Joe Philbin

Stephen Ross Claims Tony Sparano "Damaged" the Miami Dolphins

What the hell exactly is a wrong with Dolphins Owner Stephen Ross? This is a guy who saw the public outrage over the Marlins stadium debacle, and almost immediately begins his own ill-timed campaign to seek public funds for a stadium upgrade. He's also apparently a guy who can't understand why an em ... More >>

Five Free Agents the Miami Dolphins Must Try to Sign

The NFL's free-agency period begins this Tuesday, March 12, and your Miami Dolphins -- with about $36 million in cap space -- are poised for one of the biggest offseasons in franchise history. Naturally, there's a good chance they'll fuck it up, but here are the five free agents the Dolphins should ... More >>

Dolphins Fans Disappointed With Season, Satisfied With Prime Seating Package

The Miami Dolphins ended another disappointing season Sunday, once again missing the playoffs.Rookie quarterback Ryan Tannehill did his best in his first season, though nothing near fellow playoff-bound rookies Washington's Robert Griffin III, Indianapolis' Andrew Luck and Seattle's Russell Wilson. ... More >>

Bragging Rights

Stinky Phins

Titans Obliterate Dolphins 37-3 for Worst Home Loss Since 1968

So how good do you feel about Jeff Ireland and the Dolphins' talent level today?Two weeks after a convincing victory over a floundering Jets team, the Dolphins are 4-5 and facing "must win" scenarios for most of their remaining seven games in order to salvage the season after getting completely blow ... More >>

Special Teams, Defense Fuel Dolphins 30-9 Romp Over Jets

With the SUPER COLOSSAL ZOMG! CYCLO-SNOW-FRANKEN-PERFECT-MEGA-SUPER-BLABLAZO STORM OF THE MILLENIUM bearing down on the Northeast, the Dolphins crushed the hated Jets 30-9 and rode out of town just before the storm stranded them. Bad. Assssss.

Dolphins Beat Rams 17-14 Despite Rushing for Only 20 Yards

The Miami Dolphins are 3-3 today in spite of absolutely listless performances by both teams in a boring game, a second straight game of questionable (read: crappy) officiating and the Dolphins only rushing for a total of 20 yards all game. However, the continued influence of Ryan Tannehill's burgeon ... More >>

Dolphins Pull Out Win Against Bengals Despite Abysmal Officiating

In a game that featured absolutely putrid calls on the field by the recently-returned "professional" refs, the Dolphins managed to hold off the Cincinnati Bengals for a 17-13 win. An overall sloppy game for both teams was sealed when safety Reshad Jones intercepted Andy Dalton with 1:22 left in the ... More >>

Dolphins Fall to Cardinals 24-21 in Second OT Loss In A Row

For the second week in a row, the Dolphins failed to capitalize on opportunities to close out a game and lost an overtime game they should have won. Given the "Cardiac Cards" moniker Arizona has earned as of late, you had to figure this game would get wild towards the end despite three quarters of r ... More >>

Dolphins Lose to Jets 23-20 After Missed Field Goals, Reggie Bush Injury

There was a time when kicker Dan Carpenter was responsible for the majority of the points the Dolphins scores, and could be relied upon to line up and bang out a field goal -- from seemingly any distance -- with a twirl of his flowing locks. That time is gone now.The Miami Dolphins lost to the New Y ... More >>

Miami Dolphins Obliterate the Oakland Raiders 35 - 13

Facing a below-average Oakland Raiders yesterday, it was generally believed the Dolphins had a very good chance of beating their former AFC rival and notching the first victory for both Head Coach Joe Philbin and QB Ryan Tannehill. Then Reggie Bush came out of nowhere and decided to show everyone hi ... More >>

Are You Ready for Some Football?

Your Miami Dolphins 2012 Season Drinking Game: Drink the Pain Away

Sure, things might come together for the Miami Dolphins this year. Ryan Tannehill could quickly develop into a stud. Our offense may surprise. Joe Philbin might reveal himself as a true coaching genius in his first season. The team might make the playoffs. You might win the lottery. The polar ice ca ... More >>

Reader Mail: Chad Johnson Is a Wife-Beater With No Place in the NFL

Hard Knocks, Episode Four: The Dolphins' Personality Problem

A funny thing is happening with this year's installment of Hard Knocks. Previous seasons focused on obvious, larger-than-life coaching personalities in Rex Ryan, Herm Edwards and Brian Billick, but the idea behind this year's inside look at the Dolphins was to cut out all that cute shit and pull bac ... More >>

Dolphins Coach Joe Philbin Basically Idealizes Seinfeld's George Costanza

One would hope their team's football coach's favorite fictional character was some hyper-masculine conquerer like Conan the Barbarian or Mel Gibson's take on William Wallace in Braveheart. Sure, it would make them a drag to talk to at parties, but identifying with such brave warriors would hopefully ... More >>

Chad Johnson's Dismissal Shows the Miami Dolphins Are Hypocrites

Dressing Up The Fins

Chad Johnson's Dismissal Shows The Dolphins Are Football's Most Hypocritical Team

Uncle Luke,the man whose booty-shaking madness made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke criticizes Joe Philbin for letting go of Chad Johnson.The Miami Dolphins are the most hypocritical football organization to ever b ... More >>

Hard Knocks Episode One: Thank God For Chad Johnson

Thank God for Chad Johnson. Last night, the "Look At Me" wide receiver was the star of the first episode of Hard Knocks: Training Camp With The Miami Dolphins on HBO. You get the feeling the Dolphins brain trust of General Manager Jeff Ireland and Head Coach Joe Philbin picked up the boisterous play ... More >>

Dolphins' David Gerrard Is Apparently Better Than Peyton Manning

The Dolphins lost the "suck for Luck" contest, and didn't even come close to winning the Peyton Manning, but boy they sure did come in first place in the David Gerrard invitational. And, that might not be the worst thing ever. Sports Illustrated writer Peter King claims that Gerrard is looking ... More >>

Miami Dolphins Replace Playbooks with iPads, Will Fine Players $10,000 for Improper Use

In a move that will save thousands of pieces of paper a year, the Miami Dolphins have stepped into the digital age and will replace their phonebook-sized paper playbooks this year with iPads. Each player was issued the Apple tablet. Though, that of course means players might be tempted to load up An ... More >>

Miami Dolphins Will Star in HBO's Hard Knocks Reality Show

What does a celebrity do when they need a quick jolt of publicity to revive a fading career? Reality TV, of course. What does a sports team desperately in need of some public goodwill and attention do when they're being overshadowed in their own city? Apparently, the exact same thing.The Miami Dolph ... More >>

Everyone Defending Ozzie Guillen Needs to Shut Up and Respect Capitalism

Anyone familiar with Miami wasn't surprised that Marlins manager Ozzie Guillen's comments about Fidel Castro set off a fire storm. But certain folks in the sports world were off on the sidelines scratching their heads or muttering things about how baseball managers aren't diplomats. Some are even de ... More >>

Miami Dolphins: The Worst Franchise in the NFL

​Luther Campbell, the man whose booty-shaking madness made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be. In this special edition, Luke laments the epic fall of Miami's storied NFL team.It is a tragedy what is going on with the Miami Dolphins. One of the most suc ... More >>

Tim Tebow to the Dolphins? Please, Everyone, Shut Up

​So, Peyton Manning has chosen to play for the Denver Broncos, which officially ends the reign of Tebowmania in Colorado.What does that mean for the Dolphins? The sports media has already cued up the Tebow-to-Miami talks. We'd rather they hit the kill button. Nothing about that makes sense.

Peyton Manning Won't Be a Dolphin: So, Um, Who Is Available in the 2013 Draft?

​Peyton Manning has officially told the Miami Dolphins he won't be suiting up in aqua and orange next season. It's another embarrassing failure for owner Stephen Ross and GM Jeff Ireland, and there's even some suggestions that Manning only took the meeting with the Fins as a favor to Dan Marino. O ... More >>

Yep, Manning Only Talked to Dolphins as a Favor to Marino

​How pathetic are the Dolphins' front office? They couldn't even secure a meeting with Peyton Manning on their own and had to enlist the help of Dan Marino. Yep, despite not having played for the 'Fins for 13 years and not having any official affiliation with the team, Marino continues to be just ... More >>

Manning to Miami Rumors: No One Knows What the Hell They're Talking About, But It's Not Looking Good

​How big of a mess is the Manning mania rumor mill? Well, depending on who you ask, the Miami Dolphins are either still very much in the running to land Peyton Manning's services or completely out. Let's run down the rumors. Updated!

After Pretty Much Single-Handedly Winning the Pro Bowl, Brandon Marshall Wants a Better QB in Miami

​There's a reason the Miami Dolphins pay Brandon Marshall all that money. He's a damn good wide receiver. That's a fact he reminded everyone of with his MVP performance in yesterday's Pro Bowl; the kind of performance we see far too little of when he's actually in a Dolphins jersey.After the game, ... More >>

Miami Dolphins Eyeing Peyton Manning, Really?

​The Miami Dolphins have not had a consistent quarterback since Dan Marino, who retired at 38. Twelve years later, the Dolphins are still fumbling around trying to land a franchise quarterback even half as good as he was. Signing a 35-year-old injured player probably won't to help much, but don't ... More >>

Jeff Fisher Picks Rams Over Dolphins

​After a diva-like and dramatic decision period that a so-so coach really didn't deserve, Jeff Fisher has decided he'll be the coach of the Los Angeles St. Louis Rams instead of the Miami Dolphinsnext season . This, of course, means the Dolphins' search for a new coach is basically back to sq ... More >>

Dolphins Coaching Candidate Joe Philbin's Son Found Dead in River

​On Saturday, Green Bay Packers offensive coordinator Joe Philbin was interviewing for the head coaching position with the Miami Dolphins. On Sunday, his 21-year-old son Michael Philbin was reported missing. Yesterday, police found a body in an icy river in Wisconsin. According to ESPN,  poli ... More >>

Jeff Fisher Leaning Toward St. Louis Job; Sorry, Dolphins

​Dolphins owner Stephen Ross said shortly after firing Tony Sparano that he'd be looking for a "young Don Shula." So it sort of surprised us when he went all-in on the pursuit of Jeff Fisher. The man is certainly no young Don Shula. Jeff Fisher is, well, an old Jeff Fisher. So we're not exactly he ... More >>