Jersey Shore

No Name #2 at the Electric Pickle March 1

Now That’s What We Call a Music Festival

South Beach transsexual's interesting traffic court defense

U-Haul-Careening Transgender Woman Bashes Blood Bank Bus, Makes Strange Defense In Court

Jozy goes for a Sunday drive​"I'm a hot, sexy chick, and I don't like people fucking with me." Such is the battle call of "Jozy" -- born Ira Deford -- a preop South Beach transsexual who this month took a historic stand in traffic court after bashing the side mirror of a blood bank's bus. J ... More >>

Ten Pop Topics That Need a Beavis and Butt-Head Bunghole Ripping

MTV.comYou might remember Beavis and Butt-Head as the greatest minds of Generation X. The adolescent twosome took a hard look at '90s music videos. They were thoughtful cultural commentators who said "huh, huh, huh" a bunch.The goofy duo are returning to television this October. And creator Mike Jud ... More >>

Will Cook for Sex and Other Cookbooks to Buy for Dad on Father's Day

Dad will thank you for this.​Father's Day is Sunday and with it comes the usual array of stunningly bad gifts. We only assume that dad receives such terrible item as ties, cheap cologne and Izod polos because he never complains about them. Men like to eat and sometimes that means fendi ... More >>

Ten Photo Highlights From Aqua Girl Pool Party

Photo by Ciara Osorio​After a half-week's worth of happy hours at the Palace, girl-on-girl bowling, traffic jams, and Havana nights, Aqua Girl 2011's hottest, wettest, and wildest six hours took place this Saturday when the annual lesbian, bisexual, and trangender fest stripped down to its bikini, ... More >>

Community theater comedy: Just the Funny and Confessions of a Jewish Shiksa

Photo by Ciara Osorio​After a half-week's worth of happy hours at the Palace, girl-on-girl bowling, traffic jams, and Havana nights, Aqua Girl 2011's hottest, wettest, and wildest six hours took place this Saturday when the annual lesbian, bisexual, and trangender fest stripped down to its bikini, ... More >>

Def Jam Millions

Photo by Ciara Osorio​After a half-week's worth of happy hours at the Palace, girl-on-girl bowling, traffic jams, and Havana nights, Aqua Girl 2011's hottest, wettest, and wildest six hours took place this Saturday when the annual lesbian, bisexual, and trangender fest stripped down to its bikini, ... More >>

Ten Things Not to Wear to an Art Basel Miami Beach Club Party

via terminallaughter.caFat guy Suspenders = Faux pas​Art Basel is in full swing by now. There are oversized mollusks all over the freaking place! But in addition to the "art," come some of the very best parties, like, ever.Case in point: How To Dress Well and Toro y Moi tomorrow night at Bardot. ... More >>

Boxing Morena

via terminallaughter.caFat guy Suspenders = Faux pas​Art Basel is in full swing by now. There are oversized mollusks all over the freaking place! But in addition to the "art," come some of the very best parties, like, ever.Case in point: How To Dress Well and Toro y Moi tomorrow night at Bardot. ... More >>

What Joyce Kaufman Actually Said About Hanging Mexican Immigrants

C. Stiles​Riptide doesn't usually care much about what goes on in Broward and Palm Beach. Hell, we've got a sister blog up there to deal with this stuff, however I guess we've decided to make an exception for Tea Party fav Representative-elect Allen West. He's just named right-wing Broward radio h ... More >>

Will Castro and Unique Autosports: DJ Khaled and Miami's One-Stop Shop for Celebrity Rides

​Will Castro and Unique Autosports are both brands in themselves. Unique, once based in New York and now Miami, encompasses a car customization business as well as cable TV titles for the Speed Network and Spike TV. Boasting celebrity clients like Diddy, the cast of the Jersey Shore, 50 Cent, and ... More >>

Sander Van Doorn at Eden Terrace September 17

​Will Castro and Unique Autosports are both brands in themselves. Unique, once based in New York and now Miami, encompasses a car customization business as well as cable TV titles for the Speed Network and Spike TV. Boasting celebrity clients like Diddy, the cast of the Jersey Shore, 50 Cent, and ... More >>

The Funk at Caffe Vialetto in Coral Gables

Photo By Danielle AlvarezThe Funk "This dessert is the funk!"No, Short Order has not let the cast of Jersey Shore in on our dining research. The most popular dessert at upscale, Coral Gables fusion eatery Caffé Vialetto is named "the Funk." And rightfully so. The other most ordered sweet item is ca ... More >>

Christy's Mega Shrimp Cocktail

Photo by Danielle Alvarez​Christy's in Coral Gables serves shrimp that look as juiced up as the male stars of Jersey Shore. Locals often frequent the upscale eatery on the corner of Ponce de Leon Boulevard and Malaga Street simply for the shrimp cocktail. It gives new meaning to the famed oxymoron ... More >>

Forget "Miami-Wade": Name the County After These True South Floridians

Midwesterner.​The Dwyane-Wade-please-stay groveling continues with the county commission voting to rename our municipality Miami-Wade County. Ho-hum. It's like Miami officials have observed all of the crazy stunts Cleveland is pulling in trying to persuade LeBron James to stay a Cavalier, and ... More >>

State Attorney's Office Closes Assault Case Against Jersey Shore's Sammi

Sammi "Sweatheart" has evaded justice.Now that the Jersey Shore scourge has left our fair shores (only to be replaced with the possible threat of something slightly less crude and greasy) it seems the entire city, even the criminal justice system, is ready to be done with them completely.  ... More >>

Best of Miami 2010: Best Twitter Feed

In anticipation of the upcoming Best of Miami issue hitting newsstands June 17, here is a sneak peek at one category and its winner.​@AlfredSpellmantwitter.com/alfredspellmanMany people familiar with 31-year-old Alfred Spellman probably don't realize the wealth of knowledge and topics that the Ra ... More >>

305 Live: Flo Rida, Iceberg, Mayday and More in Local Hip-Hop News

Photo by David "Dro" Rosario​Flo-Rida teams up with the ultra-trendy David Guetta to releases his latest single off his upcoming album The Only One. The song is also featured on the Step Up 3D soundtrack. The song is called "Club Can't Handle Me" where Flo handles the main vocals and David Guetta ... More >>

Ten Dirtiest Hotels in America List Includes Two on Miami Beach

via Trip AdvisorThe lobby of the Parisian. ​Cleanliness is next to Godliness, and according to a recent list by Trip Advisor two Miami Beach hotels are devilishly dirty. The website's list of the ten dirtiest hotels in America includes two right here on Miami Beach.The Parisian Hotel & Suites ... More >>

Eighty Percent of Cocaine Contains Chemical That Will Rot Your Flesh

​We've seen some coke heads practically descend into a zombie-like state where they become completely devoid of normal human emotion and only fixate on their next fit like they were in a George Romero movie looking for brains (pure, uncut Bolivian marching brains). Well, now co ... More >>

Album Review: Trina's Amazin'

​New Times writer Esther Park wrote a profile of Trina and the activities surrounding the release of her triumphant fourth album, Amazin'. Read it here.TrinaAmazin' (Slip-N-Slide Records) "Who is Trina?" -- that's the first thing you hear when you press play on Amazin', the fifth full-length s ... More >>

Sun-Sentinel Wants to Know if You'd Like to Watch People Die

​Hey, you. Yeah, you over there. You look like a man who enjoys watching a video of people being beaten, maimed, tortured, maybe even killed. Yeah, I can tell that about ya. Listen, I know a guy who might be able to get some of those kinda films, but it might look bad for a guy like me giving ... More >>

Morons of the Week: Murderer Haunted by Text Messages, Tea Party Protesters, and Cesar Carasa

We had some strange and creepy ones this week. Let's get down to it: Isn't Google image incredible?​5. Paul Edwards, busted for murder by his alleged victim's beyond-the-grave text message. So cops investigating a missing female sent their top suspect, her boyfriend and Miramar reside ... More >>

After Jersey Shore Leaves, You Can Stay in Their Hotel Room for Just $2,000 a Night

​The Herald ran a story this weekend on Jersey Shore and other reality shows on South Beach, which we promptly ignored because reading the Herald is literally a job to us, and we don't work on the weekend. Not at this price. Anyway there is one little detail we'd like to highlight, lest it be comp ... More >>

"Outrageous Chongas and Bros" Being Cast for Jersey Shore-Like Reality Show

​Thanks to Jersey Shore, the era of ethnocentric reality-TV trash is upon us, and it was only a matter of time before someone decided to mine the potential reality-TV gold that is Miami's vast chonga community. We're 99 percent sure this isn't an April Fools' Day joke.Beach Pictures, the productio ... More >>

Comedian Chelsea Handler on Thongs, the Jersey Shore, and Why God Loves Sushi

E! EntertainmentChelsea Handler, comedian, producer, author, and host of Chelsea Lately, loves the little things in life like sex and Belvedere vodka. She also has a pretty big month. Her latest book Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang is #1 on the New York Times bestseller list. Her other two books -- Hello, ... More >>

Jersey to SoBe: Midnight House Mafia Holds Sway at Gemma Lounge

John HoodDon't think for a second that this house throwdown has anything at all to do with the knuckleheads from that inexplicably popular show Jersey Shore; in fact the keen cats behind this action are about as far-removed from those dimwits as one could get and still be in the Garden State. The li ... More >>

Bad Girls Club Is in Town, Still No Update on Jersey Shore Arrival

Two very different types of situations​Browsing the weekly listing of film permits issued in Miami-Dade sometimes yields interesting results. For instance, Vogue will apparently shoot photos in Haulover Park. Yes, that's home of the nude beach.It also seems the Miami-set fifth seaso ... More >>

Ritz Carlton Seeks Tanning Butler; Jersey Shore Not Welcome to Apply

courtesy of the RitzToken tanning butler Here is a job that exists only in Miami: tanning butler. And the Ritz Carlton South Beach has lost theirs. Boo hoo.But that's good news for the masses of sexy, needy unemployeds currently lollygagging in our beaches. The hotel is looking for a new one. Only m ... More >>

Six Questions With Music is a Weapon

Jeffrey Delannoy​Music is a Weapon has been making some noise for a couple of years. This coming Saturday they will be rocking the Vagabond alongside local Spanish-language punks G2 and Dutch DJ's Saskia Rocks and Geza Weisz for the big-top party Cirque Excentrique; featuring "Party Monster" ... More >>

Jersey Shore Cast Must Get Medical Clearance Before Coming to Miami

​So Jersey Shore is officially coming to South Beach for season two, but before the cast mates arrive, they'll have to undergo a series of medical tests.We're not sure if it's for our safety or theirs. Lord knows what kind of health havoc they could wreak on our great city. I mean, they each ... More >>

WMC 2010: Mad Fools Party with Buraka Som Sistema, Kill the Noise, Jokers of the Scene at Electric Pickle March 27

J-Wow of Buraka Som Sistema (front) making his Miami debut during WMC.​Finally, here it is. Poplife has announced its annual WMC party, and not a moment to spare -- cutting it close there kids. This year Miami's perennial hipster party is teaming up with Mad Decent and Fool's Gold to bring you Mad ... More >>

Yelp Hosts a South Beach Dive Bar Dash Tomorrow

CC by 2.0, via Lana_aka_BADGRL on Flickr​Ever made a run for it in the name of alcohol? The people behind the Miami chapter of Yelp.com want to see if you can really hang. Every month the Yelpers plan pub and bar crawls, rotating neighborhoods and themes. First up this year was South Miami, with a ... More >>

Richard Vission

CC by 2.0, via Lana_aka_BADGRL on Flickr​Ever made a run for it in the name of alcohol? The people behind the Miami chapter of Yelp.com want to see if you can really hang. Every month the Yelpers plan pub and bar crawls, rotating neighborhoods and themes. First up this year was South Miami, with a ... More >>

Kiss My Cocktail: Pop My Cherry from Burger & Beer Joint

Photo by Riki AltmanBurger & Beer Joint's Pop My Cherry​No, B&BJ doesn't probably sell lots of whipped cream-topped adult milkshakes to the biker dudes and Jersey Shore/Ed Hardy-wearin' wannabes when they stroll without their bitches, but you can imagine how sexy it would be to share one o ... More >>

He Loves Sherry and So Do You

Photo by Riki AltmanBurger & Beer Joint's Pop My Cherry​No, B&BJ doesn't probably sell lots of whipped cream-topped adult milkshakes to the biker dudes and Jersey Shore/Ed Hardy-wearin' wannabes when they stroll without their bitches, but you can imagine how sexy it would be to share one o ... More >>

He Loves Sherry and So Do You

Photo by Riki AltmanBurger & Beer Joint's Pop My Cherry​No, B&BJ doesn't probably sell lots of whipped cream-topped adult milkshakes to the biker dudes and Jersey Shore/Ed Hardy-wearin' wannabes when they stroll without their bitches, but you can imagine how sexy it would be to share one o ... More >>

"Fidel" Supports Conan. The Guy Who's Really to Blame for NBC's Mess? Miami's Own Jeff Zucker

​Man, it seems like everyone has an opinion on NBC's Conan O'Brien/Jay Leno disaster. Even, apparently, Cuban dictator Fidel Castro.Just about every late night show has devoted most of its monologue to the situation, and O'Brien's tonight show is no different. Last night, among his many bits, Cona ... More >>

Bruce Springsteen Show Canceled Tonight due to Death of Danny Federici

​Man, it seems like everyone has an opinion on NBC's Conan O'Brien/Jay Leno disaster. Even, apparently, Cuban dictator Fidel Castro.Just about every late night show has devoted most of its monologue to the situation, and O'Brien's tonight show is no different. Last night, among his many bits, Cona ... More >>

Tin Chefs

The disconnect between a culinary student's white-collar dreams and the restaurant world's blue-collar reality

Forever Missing

For more than two decades Donna Weaver has been trying to solve the mystery of her husband's disappearance, but the U.S. government insists it's a secret

The Education of Shawn Lewis

Lesson #1: Hard work and an aptitude for computers can make a young man rich. Lesson #2: Some rich young men take to South Beach like fish to water. Lesson #3: South Beach is the shark. A young man with money is the bait.

Crazy Nutty Asian Place

Beatlenut

He Got Derby

Beatlenut

Calendar for the week

Beatlenut

Calendar for the week

Beatlenut

Born to Win

Bruce Springsteen bounces back with his first release of the Nineties - and we've got an exclusive pre-release copy!