Fort Myers

  • Blogs

    November 10, 2014

    South Florida's Pretty Boy Gangsta: "I Was In Prison With T.I., Same Dorm"

    Going from dirty clothes to filthy rich isn't easy, but Fort Myers' Pretty Boy Gangsta has done it by traversing Alligator Alley to Miami for over a decade. The rapper whose brother built the label and studio that made Plies famous is about to star in his own MTV music video. Working with his own ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 5, 2014

    WTF Florida Friday: Meth-Heads With Toilets, Stabber Babysitters, and Taco Bell Butts

    A lot of weird things happen in Florida. We're here every Friday morning to give you the week's weirdest. This week, that includes meth-heads armed with a toilet, a babysitter who stabbed a DILF, and a gross story about butts in a Taco Bell that probably doesn't end how you think it will.

  • Blogs

    April 18, 2014

    Sorry Florida, Stuffed Baby Alligators In Odd Poses Are About To Become Illegal

    Looking for a nice stuffed baby alligator posed so it looks like it's waving hello for your living room or bedside table? Better act fast. The Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission proposed a new set of alligator-related rules Thursday, and, in addition to suggesting changes like a new ... More >>

  • Blogs

    April 16, 2014

    Three Cops Sold Guns All Over South Florida, Sent to Prison (Video)

    In December, I received an email from a former police officer once featured in Miami New Times for blowing the whistle on dirty cops in the town of Golden Beach. Life had turned upside down for Tammy Valdes and her husband, Rafael, since she won a $233,000 judgment against the town in 2012 for unjus ... More >>

  • Blogs

    March 17, 2014

    Lawmaker Wants To Drug Test Every Single Elected Official In Florida

    On the one hand, mass drug testing laws are inherently evil and unconstitutional. But on the other, requiring the same elected officials who keep trying to force drug tests on welfare recipients and minimum wage-earning state employees would be beautifully ironic -- especially in the wake of one Rep ... More >>

  • Blogs

    November 8, 2013

    Zagat Says Python-Topped Pizza in Ft. Myers Best Represents Florida

    Zagat has declared the "Everglades Pizza" at Evan's Neighborhood Pizza in Ft. Myers as the pizza that best represents the state of Florida. The pie contains somewhat, er, original toppings, such as python, whole frog legs, and alligator sausage. It also costs $45 for a 14-inch pie. You may rememb ... More >>

  • Blogs

    July 11, 2013

    Five Reasons Today's Rappers Are Fakes

    Hip-hop has hit a new low. It's nothing but a flashy circus full of liars, cheats, and corporate scum. They all want to talk big shit about coming from the streets or representing the hood, but too many have never seen an actual corner in their lives. Not only are they liars, but they're actually h ... More >>

  • Blogs

    April 2, 2013

    Radio Hosts Suspended for Telling Gullible Floridians the Water Supply Is Tainted With Water

    In terms of humor, telling people that their water is tainted with "dihydorgen monoxide" is about on par with telling someone their epidermis is showing, but the dumb joke got two popular Southwest Florida country music radio hosts suspended.

  • Blogs

    March 13, 2013

    Miami Ranked Seventh "Trashiest Spring Break Destination" in America

    We in Miami, bitch. And we're beer-bongin' Coors Light at 11 a.m. on South Beach while riding a stolen DecoBike with our tits out, a brand-new bleeding tattoo disappearing into the crack of that fat ass, and a gut full of Starburst, naked Hooters wings, and Jell-o shots. That's why, according t ... More >>

  • Blogs

    October 29, 2012

    No Newspaper Has Endorsed Connie Mack for Senate (And They're Not Nice About It Either)

    Poor Rep. Connie Mack IV. He's trying his damnedest to turn the fact that he shares his name with his ex-senator dad into a Senate career of his own, but the latest polls show him trailing boring old incumbent Bill Nelson by anywhere from 5 to 8 points (a practical landslide for Florida's deeply div ... More >>

  • Blogs

    May 8, 2012

    Florida Boy Arrested for Pulling a Machete on Kids for Bullying Mexicans

    A 13-year-old Fort Myers boy was arrested last Friday for allegedly brandishing a machete while chasing a group of elementary school children at a bus stop. The stunt was apparently in retaliation for the younger boys' bullying the knife wielder's 10-year-old friend and for "messing with Mexicans."

  • News

    March 15, 2012
  • Blogs

    November 25, 2011

    Five Crazy Black Friday Shopping Frenzies

    ​For many Americans, this Thursday will be a day of thankful reflection over a meal the size of which a third-world family has never seen. But according to the National Retail Federation, about 152 million of those folks (that's about half the population) can be expected to line the cold shopping ... More >>

  • Blogs

    November 21, 2011

    Florida Principal Reports Two Students Kissing As "Possible Sex Crime"

    ​This really is the only logical endpoint in a state so obsessed with sex crimes that we banished sex offenders to live under a bridge and unleashed prosecutors onto sexting teens: A teacher sees two 12-year-old students smooching in gym class and tells the school's principal, who then report ... More >>

  • Blogs

    November 2, 2011

    Nine-Year-Old Girl Told Not to Eat Candy on School Bus Tells Police: "I Will F***ing Kill You!"

    ​A nine-year-old Florida girls loves candy almost as much as she hates police: a lot.What started as a request by the girl's school bus driver to stop eating candy on the bus ended with the girl getting pepper-sprayed and charged with four felonies.

  • Blogs

    August 10, 2011

    Vapiano Brickell Will Cook Your Pasta While You Watch

    Vapiano, a fast-casual Italian-food chain from Germany, is set to open this November at 1221 Brickell Ave. Already huge in Europe, the chain boasts 45 locations in Germany alone. And there are 11 Vapianos in the States.The concept is fresh fast food served in an upscale environment with cafeteria-st ... More >>

  • Blogs

    August 9, 2011

    Florida Foot Fetishist Arrested After Apologizing for Touching Neighbor's Feet While She Slept

    ​Well, you can't say Salvatore Louise Pascucci isn't a pervert without manners. The 26-year-old Port Charlotte man developed a crush on his 36-year-old neighbor and decided the best thing to do was to break into her home late at night and put his hand on her thigh and feet while she slept. He ret ... More >>

  • Blogs

    June 10, 2011

    Javarris James Arrested for Marijuana Possession in Fort Myers

    ​Well, at least he managed to keep out of trouble while he was with the 'Canes.Indianapolis Colts running back Javarris James was arrested last night by police in Fort Myers, Fl and charged with misdemeanor charges of marijuana possession. James, the cousin of former 'Canes and Colts legend Edgerr ... More >>

  • News

    November 25, 2010
  • Blogs

    November 2, 2010

    Bulletproof Tiger's Kris Huseby Talks Boxed Wine, Groupies, and Handmade CDs

    Bulletproof Tiger at play.​Kris Huseby is a local musician, chef, syndicated sports columnist, and thong-sandal model. But he's probably better known for having pounded the drums with Fireside Social and currently fronting Bulletproof Tiger. The latter band recently got back to South Florida ... More >>

  • Blogs

    October 25, 2010

    Alex Sink Picks Up Endorsement From Every Major Newspaper in the State

    In an age when the broadsheets are struggling and anyone can make their own mini-endorsements on Twitter or Facebook, do newspaper endorsements still matter? The Democratic Governor nominee better hope so. She's walked away with the support of every major newspaper's editorial board in the state. Th ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 21, 2010

    Fort Myers Cop Fired After Staging a Crime in Desperate Scheme to Propose to Ex-Girlfriend

    ​It's a story as old as time. Boy cop meets girl cop. Boy cop and girl cop date for a while. Girl cop dumps boy cop. Boy cop stages a fake crime in hopes that girl cop will show up at the scene so he can propose to her and save their relationship. Sounds right out of a fairy tale, doesn't it?

  • Blogs

    June 4, 2010

    Plies (And Young Jeezy) Cancel 2010 VH1 Hip-Hop Honors Appearances

    ​Contrary to music industry buzz, Fort Myers' hottest rapper, Plies, has just announced that he will not be performing at the 2010 VH1 Hip-Hop Honors airing next Monday, June 7 at 9 p.m. This is the first time ever that VH1 is honoring a particular geographic area for its contribution, and as you ... More >>

  • Blogs

    January 20, 2010

    South Florida Voters and Winners in the Village Voice's New Pazz Jop Poll

    ​It's January, which means it's time for another edition of the Village Voice's annual Pazz and Jop poll of music critics. Yes, it's probably the latest, high-profile wrap-up of the best music of 2009, but it's also the biggest in sheer number of voices -- some 697 voters submitted ballots this ye ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 30, 2009

    Plies Surprises Fan by Paying for Her University of Miami Tuition

    Fort Myers rapper Plies got criticized for tossing $50,000 into a crowd at a concert held by Atlanta radio station Hot 107.9 this summer.At the station's recent holiday concert, he returned, but this time instead of setting off a mellee after making it rain he brought one lucky fan onstage and prom ... More >>

  • Blogs

    November 6, 2009

    Slip N Slide DJ Purfiya Can't R.I.P. Because He's Not Dead

    via myspace/djpurfiyaDJ Purfiya with Suga Shack from Wild 98.7​DJ Purfiya is from the city of Palmetto, Florida, just south of Tampa. He's affiliated with Miami's own Slip N Slide Records as one of their official DJs.Wednesday, rumors hit the Internet -- namely Twitter -- that he had died due to c ... More >>

  • Blogs

    November 5, 2009

    Crist Denies Endorsing Stimulus Bill; Owns Up to Accepting Reality

    Capture of an anti-Crist ad paid for by the Club for Growth​Charlie Crist went on CNN yesterday and said that he didn't endorse the stimulus package. Huh? What? Riptide was there when he appeared with President Obama touting the stimulus in Ft. Myers. Even though the White House is claim ... More >>

  • Blogs

    June 18, 2009

    Study: Miami Amongst 20 Weakest Metro Areas

    via Brookings InstituteFlorida is the only state that starts with an FHere's the bad news: According to a new study of the 100 most populous metro areas in America by the Brookings Institution, the Miami area, including the rest of South Florida, is one of the 20 economically weakest metro areas in ... More >>

  • Blogs

    May 8, 2009

    Pop-ska Band After The Fact to Play Area 7 on May 17

    Fort Myers pop-punkers After the Fact will play Area 7 after streak-attacking the performers and audience at the Girls in Bands event the night before. The boys, though seemingly naked at all other shows as well as in this corresponding photo, will be dressed up as a chipmunk, pig and polar bear. Fo ... More >>

  • Blogs

    May 7, 2009

    Girls in Bands To Kick Off Area 7's Avant-Garde Series on May 16

    Area 7's new Avant-Garde Series will kick off May 16 wth "Girls in Bands," an event promoting acts that feature an experimental, noise, and/or indie sound and have at least one female member. The bands hail from across Florida, including Jacksonville, Miami, and Orlando. Curious Hair will open the s ... More >>

  • Blogs

    February 23, 2009

    Kevin Burns Has a Campaign Gimmick Too

    With a field for the 2010 Senate Race filled with a bunch of long shot candidates, everyone has to have a gimmick, because, hey, it worked for Walkin' Lawton Chiles and Bob "Work Days" Graham. Dan Gelber promises to complete 100 days of public service and buy up a million Google ads (net roots!). Ke ... More >>

  • Blogs

    February 18, 2009

    Crist Could Be Elected Ms. Florida if He Wanted, but Floridians Like Him as Gov

    Oh, that Charlie Crist -- he's so popular. Quinnipiac, always interested in exactly how popular, finds that Charlie can be pretty much elected to anything he wants. But 41 percent of Floridians prefer he seeks re-election as governor, compared to 22 percent who would like to see him run for Senate. ... More >>

  • Blogs

    February 11, 2009

    White House Edits Out Charlie Crist Hose-Grab Remark has the official "remarks as prepared for delivery" up from yesterday's town hall meeting in Fort Myers. Suspiciously missing? "Every body needs to grab a hose and that is what Charlie Crist is doing here today." It just ends with "...grab a hose!"Meaning, someone edited it out, or ... More >>

  • Blogs

    February 10, 2009

    Live From The Barack Obama Stimulus Tour

    Riptide is live today from Ft. Myers, Florida for Barack Obama's first visit to Florida as President of the United States of America. He'll be continuing the themes from his stop in Elkhart, Indiana and his first press conference last night, talking up the need for a stimulus package. The event wi ... More >>

  • Blogs

    February 10, 2009

    Is There an Ulterior Motive to Picking Fort Myers?

    Riptide just settled in at the Harborside Event Center in Fort Myers. President Obama is scheduled to kick off the next stop on his Stimulus Tour in about 30 minutes, and we'll begin the live blog then.So, why of all places is Obama in Fort Myers? The official line is that the city is suffering from ... More >>

  • Blogs

    February 9, 2009

    Get Ready to Care About Lt. Gov. Jeff Kottkamp

    Did anyone really care about Lt. Gov Jeff Kottkamp before, say, a few weeks ago? You know, when those rumors surfaced that Charlie Crist might resign to run for Senate, leaving Kottkamp as our 45th governor. All of a sudden, media attention bumped up ever so slightly. The Sun-Sentinel did a little d ... More >>

  • News

    February 5, 2009

    The Robes of Justice

    Death row inmate wants seat on state supreme court.

  • Blogs

    October 28, 2008
  • Blogs

    October 6, 2008

    Photos that won't help the "MMA is not gay!" cause

    In July, New Times columnist Elyse Wanshel opined that perhaps Mixed Martial Arts -- that sport of sweat-drenched extreme dry-humping -- is a tad bit homosexual. Diehard MMA fans, it turns out, weren't exactly pleased (by the way, thanks for the anthrax!) Well, you're all forgiven for doubting us. ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 15, 2008

    Herald Bundles Controversial Documentary with Sunday's Paper

    Miami Herald subscribers got a little more than the paper delivered to their doors on Sunday. Bundled inside was a DVD of the controversial documentary "Obsession: Radical Islam's War Against the West". The Clarion Fund paid to distribute the DVD through about 70 newspapers and magazines to subscrib ... More >>

  • News

    May 15, 2008

    Letters from the Issue of May 15, 2008

    "The public school system has created a shameful legacy."

  • News

    November 30, 2006


    Against long odds and even longer distances, a group of Miami-Dade teens competes for a shot at hockey glory

  • Recreation

    May 16, 2002


    Captiva Island

  • Calendar

    November 23, 2000

    Musical Feast

    Lumpy Sue Acoustic Musicfest

  • News

    April 20, 2000


    How to win friends and influence people, el exilio style

  • News

    November 19, 1998

    Where Man Meets Mud

    Behold the swamp buggy races, South Florida's oddest racing tradition, where the engines roar, the muck flies, and the vehicles sometimes sink

  • News

    August 20, 1998

    A Bull Market

    Interested in Miami's new minor-league hockey team? Prepare to shell out big bucks.

  • News

    February 19, 1998

    Creature Feature

    Move over, Sasquatch. Beat it, Bigfoot. It's time you met South Florida's own: The great Skunk Ape.

  • News

    May 15, 1997

    When Vicki Met Syl, Part Two

    Accused of bribery and public corruption, this power pair finds that love and justice prevail

  • News

    May 8, 1997

    When Vicki Met Syl

    Fate introduced Miami lobbyist Sylvester Lukis to a rising political star named Vicki Lopez-Wolfe. Twenty-two felony charges later, South Florida is still reeling.

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