Don Ed Hardy

Tattoo Nation Is Beautiful and Often Majestic

Six Signs EDM Has Totally Sold Out

Did you know EDM is a big moneymaker? Nothing sells better than sex, drugs, and uhntz uhntz. And now, thanks to modern technology, you don't even have to be a respectable, talented DJ to cash in on the molly moola express. Corporations are dying to sign contracts with these party professionals. No ... More >>

Applebee's Is The Hottest New Nightclub in Central Florida

In continuing evidence that Florida nightlife outside of Miami is a sad, depressing suckfest full of streaky highlights and Ed Hardy bought at the TJ Maxx, Applebee's is the hottest new club in Central Florida. Yes, Applebee's, the suburban restaurant staple that's known for cluttering its walls wit ... More >>

ShipRocked Cruise Announces 2012 Lineup: Godsmack, Five Finger Death Punch, P.O.D.

​Thanks to South Florida's various ports, the region has become the epicenter of the music cruise phenomenon. We've already battled through the Bruise Cruise, uhntz-uhntz-ed aboard Hard's Holy Ship!, and even done time (and drugs) on a boat loaded with hippie music fans. But a few of Crossfade' ... More >>

Jose Reyes to the Marlins: The Conflicting Emotions of A Miami-Residing Mets Fan

​I was in the stands at Shea Stadium in 2006 when Endy Chavez, God bless his tiny heart, made this heroic catch in the NLCS' Game 7 to seemingly seal the Mets' glorious destiny. That was the last time I've ever experienced joy. Three innings later, Carlos Beltran was frozen by an Adam Wainwright ... More >>

Pitbull Makes GQ's "Least Influential" List, But Not Ours; Meet Miami's Five Least Influential

​​In the December issue of GQ magazine, our hometown boy Pitbull is the only Miamian to make the list of the "25 Least Influential People Alive." Tim Pawlenty claimed the top spot and others on the list with less clout than the Cuban-American rapper include actress Gwenyth Patrow, deposed E ... More >>

Cocaine, Pick-Pocketing, and Pissing Into Trashcans: What Really Goes on Inside Clubs

September's fatal shooting at Nocturnal got us wondering: What really goes on behind the velvet ropes in Miami's most chichi clubs? Our sickly journalist physique hardly qualified us to infiltrate the tanned and Ed Hardy-clad world, so instead we requested 12 months of police reports from one SoBe h ... More >>

Sunny Isles Beach gangster Jason Eibinder brags on Facebook

Man in Ed Hardy Shirt, Fanning Self With Cash, Winking, Might Not Have Gotten That Money Through Legal Means

​Whatever happened to the stoic Eastern European mobster? You know, the Viggo Mortensen type who communicates via grunts, cryptic tattoos, and the bludgeoning end of a fire extinguisher? Meet 22-year-old Sunny Isles Beach luminary Jason Eibinder, arrested in January for his role in a massive Rom ... More >>

Vancouver Riots: At Least Miami Heat Fans Didn't Burn The City Down After Dallas Won

via You Tube​Professor Charles Barkley, a noted sociologist and all around portly fellow, recently proposed a hypothesis that the Miami Heat "have the worst fans."Chuck, you might want to watch some video of what went down in Vancouver last night. Because we're pretty sure that burning your city's ... More >>

Dallas Mavericks vs. Miami Heat Game 1: Winning Time

​If you're a fan of low scoring games, low-percentage shooting and sleep depravity, then Game 1 of the NBA Finals was the game for you!LeBron James scored 24 while Dwyane Wade added 22 and Chris Bosh went for 19 as the Miami Heat took down the Dallas Mavericks 92-84 to take the first game of the b ... More >>

Fashion Freakouts on Memorial Day Weekend

​Out on the streets of Miami Beach during this long Memorial Day weekend, there were some innovative, crazy, stupid, and jaw-dropping ensembles. This year, the hipster look was in full effect and preppy getups were peppered in among more revealing garb. Gender-bending hair was all the rave wit ... More >>

Miami Heat's Number One Fan Wears Uggs

via SportsGrid​At recent Miami Heat home games, there have been not only groans and "ugh"s in the stands, but also Uggs. As in those ugly furry boots that University of Miami sorority sisters wear with miniskirts any time the temperature dips below 70. Those crimes against footwear really have no ... More >>

Miami Heat's Number One Fan Wears Uggs

via SportsGrid​At Miami Heat home games lately there have been for than a few of groans and "ughs" in the stands, but there have been literal Uggs. As in those ugly furry boots that University of Miami sorority sisters put on with miniskirts any time the temperature dips below 70. Those crimes aga ... More >>

Ten Things Not to Wear to an Art Basel Miami Beach Club Party

via terminallaughter.caFat guy Suspenders = Faux pas​Art Basel is in full swing by now. There are oversized mollusks all over the freaking place! But in addition to the "art," come some of the very best parties, like, ever.Case in point: How To Dress Well and Toro y Moi tomorrow night at Bardot. ... More >>

Skulls For Your Wrists

Gino Cabanas's work of genius doesn't pay

Jersey Shore: One of The Situation's Miami Hookups Gives Her Side of the Story

via BWE​Remember Annabelle DeSisto? She was the girl this season The Situation picked up at club Space, only to refuse to smoosh with him and dropped the classic line, "I never said anything about checkers old man." She also happens to be a former Miss Teen Florida. Well she gave her side of the s ... More >>

Jersey Shore Damage Report: Farewell Sweet Guidos

via MTV​Our long, local nightmare is over. Actually, it was more like a slightly upsetting drunken fever dream, but whatever the case last night we said "So long, farewell, auf Guido-sehen, goodnight" once and for all to our most infamous temporary residents: the cast of Jersey Shore. Amazingly, d ... More >>

Dances with Guidos: Snooki's Hair Whipping vs. The Situation's Fist Pumping

Snooki's magical glasses return! ​The gripping finale of Jersey Shore season two airs tomorrow, and with the crew heading back to the series' eponymous location for season three we'll have to say goodbye to our favorite guidos. So, obviously, we must treasure these last precious moments we have wi ... More >>

Jersey Shore Damage Report: Exit Angelina

via MTV​Sadly, time is winding down to the Macaroni Rascal's tour of destruction in Miami, but last night the journey ended for Angelina. Yes, the life-sized rat in a mini-dress and bad mascara decided to once again pack up all of the extra Swiss cheese and various shiny things she found around th ... More >>

Jersey Shore Damage Report: You Made Your Dirty Tampon Bed, Now Sleep In It

​After last week's special VMA edition scheduling confused us, we're back once again recapping the poignant take of the descendants of Italian immigrants trying to make it in the tropical melting pot of Miami Beach. Yes, it's Jersey Shore damage report time! Last night we learned never to leave ou ... More >>

Big Pink and Co.: Hangover Helpers in Miami

It's 3:30 a.m. and you're on your way home from a night out. Your speech is slurred and you're sweating Grey Goose. No one is laughing at your jokes or joining in on your renditions of Lady Gaga's "Bad Romance." Worse, you're starving. So where should you direct your designated driver?  In no s ... More >>

The Jersey Shore in South Beach Drinking Game

​Are you prepared for the most important night in Miami pop culture history? MTV unleashes the second season of Jersey Shore tonight at 10. It follows everyone's favorite guidos as they hook up, drink, and fight their way through South Beach. This might bring a tiny bit of shame to our fair city, ... More >>

Free and Open

Jersey Shore Cast Must Get Medical Clearance Before Coming to Miami

​So Jersey Shore is officially coming to South Beach for season two, but before the cast mates arrive, they'll have to undergo a series of medical tests.We're not sure if it's for our safety or theirs. Lord knows what kind of health havoc they could wreak on our great city. I mean, they each ... More >>

Where in the World Is Renyel Pinto? Part Two

Have you seen this man?​The saga of Renyel Pinto, fugitive Marlins reliever, continues. In November, Riptide reported that the rotund Venezuelan pitcher had skipped court dates in both Miami-Dade and Broward counties and was being chased by an arrest warrant and a $6,000 summary judgment as ... More >>

Q&A With DJ MGA, of Fox's Shuffle Tuesdays

​This interview is with up-and-coming local DJ Matthew Andrews, a.k.a. MGA. Folks might know him from some downtown hotspots like the Vagabond, where he pops in for the occasional Friday set. His main gig, though, is holding it down in South Miami, at the long-running Shuffle Tuesdays party at Fox ... More >>

Way Cooler than Cookie Monsters

Whiskey Tango: For the "Good" White Trash

​ Night Watch is a regular feature about bars and clubs by nightlife columnist Tara Nieuwesteeg. We walked in to Whiskey Tango All American Bar and Grill (1903 Hollywood Blvd, Hollywood; 954-925-2555; whiskeytangofl.com) to the sounds of an atrocious cover band playing "Summer of '69" and grabbed ... More >>

Night Watch Visits the Whiskey Tango All-American Bar and Grill

​Night Watch is a regularly-occurring feature about bars and clubs by nightlife columnist Tara Nieuwesteeg.When we walked in to the Whiskey Tango All American Bar and Grill (1903 Hollywood Blvd, Hollywood Call 954-925-2555 or visit whiskeytangofl.com), we were assaulted by the sounds of an atroc ... More >>

Moron of the Week: Self-Destructive Ponzi Baller Sean Healy

Photo via MySpace.com Never mind the fact hat he dresses like a club promoter. If your investment manager has a MySpace page, get a new investment manager.​Forget Flagler, Tuttle, and Brickell. We need to start naming streets and bridges after a historical figure whose legacy is honored eve ... More >>

Uber Exclusive South Beach Party, Bro

Review: Hori Smoku Sailor Jerry Screening at Miami Art Space, October 27

Photo by Arielle CastilloJacuzzi Boys played after the drink-sodden film screening.​Hori Smoku Sailor Jerry ScreeningMiami Art Space, Wynwood, MiamiTuesday, October 27, 2009Better Than: Shopping for remaindered Ed Hardy clothes in that sad sample sale/clearance trailer on US1 down south.The Review ... More >>

Uber Exclusive South Beach Party at Vagabond Thursday, Bro

Ed Hardy must die.​The Ed Hardy T-shirt. Nothing is a bigger symbol of douchebaggery in clubland than it. It's a faux-tattoo armor for those too wimpy to get real ones. Bedazzled and they achieve a whole another level of douchiness. Oh, and if you're wearing Affliction you have two strikes against ... More >>

Celebrate Sailor Jerry's Tattoo Legacy Tomorrow With a Documentary, Jacuzzi Boys, and Free Booze!

​Here's a last-minute heads up: Tomorrow night is the local screening of Hori Smoku Sailor Jerry, the new documentary about the life and times of the tattoo legend. Born Norman Keith Collins, he became the go-to ink man in Hawaii, where he developed his singular style on the bodies of hard-living ... More >>

400 Ways to Get Your Party On

Good luck lurks at Scully's Tavern in Kendall

Shiso Cool

Consider this sushi joint a neat place for a drink and really great bar snacks.

Fashion: The Other White Meat

Fashion Week Swim 2010: KRELwear Goes Neon, Chloe Gets Sexy at W, Gansevoort Disappoints

Jipsy/NefariousGirl.comKRELwear show at Miami Splashion at LIV.Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week Swim cannon balled into town last night, so expect another stream of parties, models, fashion and debauchery in the middle of our slowest season, during one of our country's greatest economic depressions. The f ... More >>

Txts from Last Night: a 305 Odyssey

via Just Making ConvoDon't have Twitter yet but want to make your drunken cell phone-written ramblings available to the public? Well, luckily Txts from Last Night is here. The site collects weird, user-submitted text messages from anonymous sources only identified by their area code. I don't know ho ... More >>

Rainy Day Musings #12 and 35

You Can Change The Spelling, But...The Z Ocean Hotel, formerly known as The Regent and home to Table 8 Restaurant, has opened Zushi Flirt -- formerly Flirt Sushi, which went out of business rather quickly after opening at Washington Avenue and 12th Street three years ago. Owner Marko Radisic still h ... More >>

Head Spins: DJ La Trice

Kicking the model beat on Lincoln Road.

Miami According to Brooklyn: Tattoo Conventions are for Jackasses

To read past installments of Miami According to Brooklyn, click here. With the tattoo convention coming up this weekend in Miami, I want to talk about how these conventions are full of jackasses. I used to work for Eulogy Recordings, one of sponsors of it, and Madball is playing on Saturday - that's ... More >>

Tales of Breakups at Splitsville, South Miami's New Bowling Alley

Anything involving preying mantises and Madonna can't be boring.

Last Night: Smashing Pumpkins at Mizner Park Amphitheatre

Over The Weekend - Swim Week, Jamie Lidell and Poplife

Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week Swim Recap

Dress to Dis

A $2000 suit with cheapo pants. Yikes!