Drug smokin', Lower East Side squattin', dumpster divin' crust-metal pop-punk crew Leftover Crack is a band that's mastered the art of branding.
For 14 years, these dudes have made themselves synonymous with unwashed, disgruntled vagabond youth culture, playing left-field ska-punk laced with death ... More >>
Given Florida's swing state importance, large population and Southern-but-not-quite status, you'd think that someone from this state would have been on a national presidential ticket by now, at least as a running mate.The media is currently rife with speculation that Senator Marco Rubio could be Mit ... More >>
Cheney: Locked, loaded, and ready to pop off.Everybody knows that former Vice President Dick Cheney is old, sick, and possibly evil. But is he a pimp?
Yes, indeed. And despite the fact that Cheney is a 70-year-old end-stage heart failure case who's contemplating a transplant while being kept ali ... More >>
Dubya is in Miami! To be more exact, he's downtown at the Miami Book Fair International, shilling his new memoir, Flapjacks: My Favorite Breakfast Treat. No, that's not right. Decision Points! It's all about the Decider's finest moments of deciding, apparently.Riptide is here, too, to bring you t ... More >>
Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness once made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke dissects the worldwide UFO conspiracy.A propaganda campaign to prepare us for the next big war is underway. But this time ... More >>
It's a travesty. An outrage. Mess with Jorge, Josh, or Freddi -- but don't fool around with Hanley.At 11 a.m. Tuesday, April 13, Florida Marlins wunderkind Hanley Ramirez awoke from graceful slumber to find somebody had vandalized three of his matching white vehicles parked in front of his seven- ... More >>
To hear former Vice President Dick Cheney tell it, if Florida voters don't elect Marco Rubio as our next senator, we'll soon live in a socialistic hellhole where terrorist attacks are scheduled every hour on the hour. Yes, the scariest vice president in history officially endorsed Rubio ... More >>
via BBJThe flashy cars, the speedboats, the trendy clothes, the bling-bling. Yeah, maybe dudes in Miami are trying to compensate for something.Online love glove store Condomania sells rubbers in 76 sizes that keep you covered no matter if you're packing a plantain or a beer can. The product has b ... More >>
Eventually, we're all going to end up unwittingly shooting one of our friends. It happens. It happened to Dick Cheney and his hunting buddy. It happened to Charlie Sheen when he inadvertently capped then-fiancée Kelly Preston. It happened to Plaxico Burress and his thigh. Now the Marlins' Jose ... More >>
We know Alan Grayson only has a tenious connection to our local readership, but important news on our favorite hot liberal mess has just come to our intention: He has told former Vice President Dick Cheney to, and we quote, "STFU."Dick Cheney occasionally pops out of his underground torture dungeon ... More >>
Let's just get this out of the way: Riptide is the last place you'll read any criticism of Alan Grayson, the U.S. representative from Orlando, for his raging political Tourette's syndrome.We wish more politicians would jump on the Grayson crazy train. What's better than hearing your local rep of ... More >>
Of all the outrages perpetrated at Guantanamo Bay -- which New Times explored in depth earlier this year on our visit to the prison camp in southern Cuba -- one of the strangest has to be the military's music-based "futility technique."via Wikimedia CommonsIn case you've succeeded in washing the ... More >>
I didn't want to put up another pix of LeMieux's face, so in its place is the greatest picture of all time. Remember when Mel Martinez deemed his primary opponent Bill McCollum as the "new darling of the homosexual extremists?" Well, now he's being replaced by the new new darling of the homosexua ... More >>
Sorry to be so GitMo heavy today, but ehgads there is a Guantanamo Bay video game in development. Yeah, we thought the idea of escaping from GitMo was and idea best reserved for fiction, and apparently we were right.
T-Enterprises, the British software company developing the game, says Ren ... More >>
The Herald's Marc Caputo was wondering if Dick Cheney ever crawled out of the hyperbolic chamber that keeps him alive in the torture dungeon basement of his demon castle, located somewhere southwest of Hell, and decided to campaign on Charlie Crist's behalf in the Senate race, would Charli ... More >>
When Barack Obama announced Joe Biden as his running mate, America responded with a resounding, "oh, ok." He's an experience, competent guy, don't get us wrong. And by all accounts he made some serious contributions to getting the cabinet together, but it seems that Mr. Biden has returned the Vice P ... More >>
So you're a 16-year-old girl, and you desperately want to break off the illicit internet romance you've sparked with a 44-year-old vampire. What do you do?
The only logical thing you can do: tell him that you're secretly a member of an elite vampire-hunting unit and that staying together would ... More >>
Dodging this shoe was like the most awesome thing President Bush has done in years. It kind of makes you remember why so many Americans wanted to have a beer with him in the first place. [AFP]Myriam Marquez wrote this horribly mean thing about Charlie Crist's wedding, and failed to make even one ... More >>