Chris Joseph

On stage this week: Making fun of Broadway and tree-hugging a-holes

Miami Dolphins Fire Special Teams Coach John Bonamego

Whether or not you actually knew the name of the Dolphins special teams coach John Bonamego before last night's bumbling loss to the Patriots, by the end of it you knew you wanted him fired. It might not be the same as erasing the soul crushing failures of last night's game from you mind, but with l ... More >>

Miami Prepares to Worship Brandon Marshall for the Next Five Years

​It's official, the Dolphins signed talented but sometimes controversial Brandon Marshall to a $50 million, five season contract making him the highest paid receiver in NFL history. We were hoping the Fins would have some big trick under their sleeves this off season, and this apparently ... More >>

Top Ten of the Decade: Miami Sports Moments

Riptide 2.0's regular sports commentator and FinsNation blogger Chris Joseph looks back at the top ten Miami sports moments of the decade. Low points like the Miami Dolphins crappy performance and the after-thought known as the Florida Panthers didn't make the cut. Sorry. ​10. Canes BaseballCoach ... More >>

The Dolphins' Ass-Kicking Prowess Has Gone International

Holy sugartits is this a magical time to be a Dolphins fan! They're just displaying all kinds of dexterity in the ass-kicking department, as they did yesterday when they flew into Canada's Rogers Centre and delivered a beatdown to the rival Buffalo Bills. The Fins defeated Buffalo 16-3 in front of ... More >>

Because Sometimes Winning Ugly Beats Not Winning At All

Once again, the Miami Dolphins had to pull unicorns and rainbows out their asses to keep from losing to a two-win team. But pull the magic from their bottoms they did, as they took down the hapless St. Louis Rams 16-12, for their seventh win of the season. Drive killing penalties, a stagnant runnin ... More >>

Don't Be Afraid to Make Them Punt or Anything

The Patriots punted once in the entire game during yesterday's 48-28 win over the Dolphins. Once. New England's offense totaled 530 yards -- the most the Dolphins defense has allowed since 1995. You could still catch brand new episodes of Seinfeld the last time the Dolphins allowed that many yards. ... More >>

Dolphins Manage to Beat Back Old Crappy Self, Win Fourth Straight

Holy crap. That was close. For a while there, it seemed as if we were witnessing the return of the Shitphins. With just 4:30 remaining in a game that the Dolphins had been leading in all day, Oakland’s John Lee Higgins ran a Miami punt back 93-yards to pay dirt, giving the Raiders their first ... More >>

The U is in First Place, Jim Kelly Still an Insufferable Douchebag

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

Dwyane Wade and the Miami Heat Overcome Slow Start, Giant Chinese Guy

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

Dolphins Hold Off Seahawks

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

Dolphins Are Now Balls Deep in the Hunt

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

A Cold Wet Dose of Reality to Our Collective Groins Courtesy of the Houston Texans

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

The Dolphins Would Like to Invite the Naysayers to Eat a Dick Sandwich

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

Marlins Upgraded to a Category 5 Shitstorm

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

Dwyane Wade: International Purveyor of Awesomeness

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

Dolphins’ New Beginning Starts Off With Old Familiar Ways

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

Marlins Make a Trade… for Arthur Rhodes?

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

Manny Ramirez a Marlin? -- UPDATED

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

The Marlins Believe You’re Just Being Silly If You Think Any Lead Is Safe Against Them

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

Marlins' VandenHurk Throws No Hitter! (Not Really)

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

Jason Taylor Traded to the Redskins

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

Scott Olsen Won Last Night, Dogs and Cats Will Now Commence Living Together

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

Hanley Ramirez and Dan Uggla Are All-Stars

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

Trial For New Marlins Stadium Starts Next Week

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

NBA Free Agency Starts Today But Everyone Knows It Really Starts in 2010

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

Miami Heat Draft Recap: The Ghost of Harold Miner Has Been Exorcized

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

Open Letter to Pat Riley

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

Thanks to Shawn Marion, the Heat Now Have More Options

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

No Reason Not to Draft Beasley

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

Hanley Ramirez Is Just Like You, Except More Awesome

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

Lehan Suffers Apparent Ankle Dislocation (Derek Hagan Still Not Injured).

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

Bill Parcells Is Good At Drafting

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

Calvin Pace Will Break Windows With His Arm In New York

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

Combine Talk - I Like Gholston More Than Long. There I Said It.

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

Combine Talk: Jerry's Got a Hankerin!

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

Howie's Kid a Dolphin?

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

Dan Henning is the New Dolphins OC

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

Bowles To Be the New Defensive Coordinator?

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

Shocking News Break: Brian Gaine Quits Cowboys

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

Clever Headline: Parcells Looks to "Gaine" a Top Dallas Scout

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

Sparano Offered Coaching Job?

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

Meet the New Nerdy White Dude, Same as the Old Nerdy White Dude

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

Shine On You Crazy Mormon

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

Cleo Lemon Won't Go Away

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

God Hates the Dolphins

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

Today's Arkansas-LSU Matchup Offers Promising Draftees

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

Either Cam Cameron Is Retarded, or John Beck Sucks

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>

The Wrath of Cam

Don’t look now but the Miami Hurricanes are in first place in the ACC Coastal Division. Couldn’t decide between watching the Canes getting their mojo back or 30 Rock last night? That’s what the "previous channel" button on the remote is for (or, for those of you still living in a world where ... More >>