Chicago Bulls

  • Blogs

    October 28, 2014

    The Miami Heat Are Doomed: Five Disasters That Could Torpedo This Season

    The Miami Heat is back in your living room tomorrow night for the season opener, looking a tad different from past years but just as cocky. Slogans, campaigns, videos -- you name it; the team wants you to know it isn't going anywhere. This is still the Miami Heat, and it competes for an NBA champion ... More >>

  • Blogs

    August 28, 2014

    The Five Best Sneaker Boutiques in Miami

    When it comes to the latest and greatest in menswear coming off of Paris and Milan's runways, the average Miami dude just doesn't get it, nor does he give two shits. But when it comes to the very touchy subject of their kicks, however, Miami men could school the best of them -- that means you, NYC a ... More >>

  • Blogs

    July 15, 2014

    Dwyane Wade Re-Signs With the Miami Heat for $34 Million

    Dwyane Wade has not only announced his intentions to return to the Miami Heat, but he apparently could also end up retiring in a Heat jersey someday. Update: Udonis Haslem is coming back too. See also: Chris Bosh Is Re-Signing With the Heat; Wade Reportedly Working On New Deal

  • Blogs

    June 18, 2014

    Where's LeBron Playing Next Year? Not For These Five Teams

    Here we go again. Welcome to Lebronapalooza 2014! LeBron James, Dwyane Wade, and Chris Bosh all have until June 29th to decide whether or not they will trigger the opt-in years in their contracts, and give this Big Three thing another go at it, and Heat Nation anxiously awaits their decisions. The s ... More >>

  • Blogs

    April 17, 2014

    LeBron James Topped Jersey Sales This Season; Heat Top Team

    The Miami Heat may be entering the NBA playoffs as a second seed, but they're tops in another set of standings. For the sixth time, LeBron James' jersey was the top seller in the league. The Miami Heat, meanwhile, sold more merchandise this season than any other team.

  • Blogs

    April 11, 2014

    The Miami Heat Really Wants Second Place

    Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. Today, Luke addresses what's wrong with the Miami Heat before the big game against the Indiana Pacers. I love the Miami Heat, but right now Lebr ... More >>

  • Blogs

    March 24, 2014

    Miley Cyrus - American Airlines Arena, Miami - 3/22/2014

    Miley Cyrus' Bangerz Tour With Icona Pop American Airlines Arena, Miami Saturday, March 22, 2014 "Woo! Woooooo! I'm in Miami, bitch! I'm gonna fuck Miley Cyrus tonight! Bangerz tour! I'm gonna bang her all night!" shouted an overexcited guy in front of us. Meanwhile, much like Halloween on South ... More >>

  • Calendar

    January 30, 2014
  • News

    November 7, 2013
  • Blogs

    October 31, 2013

    Wade Sits, Heat Fall To 76ers 114-110

    Tuesday night the Miami Heat threw an elaborate "We Are The Champions" party at American Airlines Arena, a night that ended in them dominating the Chicago Bulls, and landing in Philadelphia at 3 a.m. Wednesday they woke up, had breakfast, fell down 19-0 to the Philadelphia 76ers, and got their asses ... More >>

  • Calendar

    October 31, 2013
  • Blogs

    June 18, 2013

    Game 6 Preview: The Big Three Era Comes Down To Tonight

    The term "must-win" is rather carelessly thrown about in sports. Following the Heat's Game One loss to the Chicago Bulls in the East Semi-Finals, the term popped up because one could not fathom the Heat going down 0-2 to Chicago, much less losing both home games to start the series. The reality was, ... More >>

  • Calendar

    June 6, 2013
  • Blogs

    May 14, 2013

    In Defense of Dwyane Wade's Man Capris

    Miami Heat star Dwyane Wade is no stranger to fashion provocation, but gauging by the reaction from his stroll into Chicago's United Center last night in a tailored Gucci suit that featured ankle-flashing capri pants, you would have assumed he'd shown up in a rainbow Speedo and glittery suspenders. ... More >>

  • Blogs

    May 9, 2013

    Who Is the Middle-Finger Lady Making All Miami Heat Fans Proud This Morning? UPDATED

    Middle-finger lady: Riptide salutes you, for you are truly the soul of Miami embodied. Your patterned silk shirt: Glorious. Your tan: Immaculate. Your leather purse, gold jewelry and white pants: Perhaps wrong for a basketball contest, but oh so right. And your look of pure glee as you shove your ... More >>

  • Blogs

    May 6, 2013

    Miami Heat Plays Tonight: Watch Parties at MPP and Toro Toro with Octopus & Beer,

    The Miami Heat is on, and no we're not talking about the weather. Defending champions (is it too soon to predict this year's outcome?) and our lovable hometown team swept round one of the playoffs and begins young two tonight against the Chicago Bulls. What do you have to say about that Lil' Wayne? ... More >>

  • Blogs

    April 29, 2013

    Heat Buries Bucks 88-77, Sweeps First-Round Series in Four Games

    The Miami Heat minus an injured Dwyane Wade closed out the Milwaukee Bucks Sunday afternoon with an 88-77 victory, sweeping the best-of-seven series four games to none. As was a theme in this series, the Bucks lulled the Miami Heat to sleep for three quarters, hanging around until the Heat decided ... More >>

  • Blogs

    April 12, 2013

    Ten Best Music-Related Things Under $10 to Do in Miami This Weekend

    "Everybody's working' for the weekend." Oh, Loverboy, you may have been wrong about a lot of things, but were you right about that.The weekend is finally and you can't let it go to waste because before you know it, it will disappear as quickly as Loverboy and the rest of the '80s faded away.That doe ... More >>

  • Blogs

    March 28, 2013

    Heat's Winning Streak Ends at 27 With Loss in Chicago

    If you have a heart condition or are pregnant, you should not continue reading this article due to possible health-related concerns: The Miami Heat lost. Nope, don't update your Miami New Times app; this is today's news. No need to check if today is April 1, still a few days away. It really happened ... More >>

  • Blogs

    February 18, 2013

    Fishbone Brought Furious Tsunamis of Soul to Swamp Stomp 2013 at Tobacco Road

    In the shadows of a cocaine skyline, in the bitter freeze of winter, with fewer than a legion of supporters, and a raging douchenozzle hellbent on destruction ... The seven samurai of Fishbone gathered by the river, armed for battle, and unleashed a sonic boom of future funk on the Tobacco Road pa ... More >>

  • Blogs

    January 24, 2013

    Miami Heat Worth $625 Million: Sixth Most Valuable in the NBA

    The Miami Heat are worth a cool $625 million, according to the latest NBA team valuations by That's up 307 percent since last year, or almost $200 million since 2012 when the team was valued at $427 million. Apparently that championship made a big difference.

  • Blogs

    April 11, 2012

    Heat Loses to the Celtics at Home, Falls Three Games Behind Number One Seed

    LeBron James scored a game-high 36 points last night, while the rest of the Miami Heat stood and watched as the Boston Celtics shot 60 percent from the floor in yet another listless-shit-the-bed-let's-all-go-outside-and-punt-a-litter-of-kittens-loss by the Heat.Rajon Rondo once again had his way aga ... More >>

  • Blogs

    March 15, 2012

    Dwyane Wade's Dad Ejected From Bulls Game For Dirty Mouth

    ​Apparently LeBron James isn't the only Heat star with a sometimes embarrassing parent. Dwyane Wade's father, Dwyane Wade Sr., was ejected from the United Arena last night during the Bulls-Heat game, reportedly for yelling obscenities. Jeez, what a big fucking bag of dicks. Updated. 

  • Blogs

    January 17, 2012

    NBA GM Survey: Heat Will Win Championship, LeBron Has Good Shot at MVP

    ​It's tough to find a group of people who know the NBA more than the league's own group of general managers. For the tenth year in a row, surveyed all 30 GMs to get their take on the state of the league, and 74.1 percent think the Miami Heat will win the NBA Championship. They also think L ... More >>

  • Blogs

    January 11, 2012

    Heat Blow 17-Point Lead, Lose to Warriors, Let's Everybody Overreact!

    ​While you were sleeping last night, the Miami Heat offense also fell asleep in the fourth quarter of their 111-106 overtime loss to the Golden State Warriors.It was a game of turnovers, sloppy play, Mario Chalmers dribbling basketballs off his foot, Udonis Haslem missing dunks, LeBron James ... More >>

  • Blogs

    June 13, 2011

    Las Vegas Odds Makers: Heat Favored to Win 2012 Finals

    ​Let's hope you didn't burn any of your Miami Heat championship party decorations last night, because according to Las Vegas odds makers, Dwyane Wade and company are already the frontrunners for the 2012 finals. Apparently winning last night hasn't made Dirk Nowitzki and his Dallas Mavericks favor ... More >>

  • Blogs

    June 10, 2011

    Four Facts To Help You Fake Your Way Through an NBA Finals Conversation

    Wikimedia Commons user steenslagA clown cries after getting mocked for asking what time the Celtics game was on.​The Heat are down 3-2. Dwyane Wade has a busted hip. LeBron James had a triple-double and still, somehow, looked horrible. It was a bad night.But it doesn't have to be a bad day, too. C ... More >>

  • Blogs

    May 31, 2011

    Dear America: Stop Criticizing Miami Heat Fans

    ​Dear America,We address you as ambassadors of sorts from the culturally sovereign nation of Miami-Dade. It's recently come to our attention that the "Miami Heat," a professional sporting concern that represents our city in your National Basketball Association, has advanced to a series which will ... More >>

  • Blogs

    May 26, 2011

    Five Reasons Miami Is a Better City Than Dallas

    The Dallas Mavericks earned a spot in the NBA Finals Wednesday night with their 100-96 win over the Oklahoma City Thunder, which means once the Heat finally put the Chicago Bulls out of their misery tonight, all that stands between Miami and a national title is a shaggy, horse-toothed German and his ... More >>

  • Blogs

    May 26, 2011

    Miami Heat White Hot Road Rally Tonight at American Airlines Arena

    Miami Heat The Heat Dancers and Food Trucks - that's (white) hot!​Tonight you can watch the Miami Heat finish off the Chicago Bulls at the AAA Arena. We know what you're thinking -- this is an "away" game so how are you supposed to watch it at the arena in Miami? When it's the Miami Heat Wh ... More >>

  • Blogs

    May 24, 2011

    Joakim Noah, Odd Future, and the Politics of the Word "Faggot"

    ​It's a weird week for the word "faggot," ain't it? The Chicago Bull's Joakim Noah just got fined a discounted $50,000 for addressing an unruly Heat fan as such during game three of the NBA Eastern Conference Finals in Miami on Sunday. Meanwhile, Goblin, the proper debut album of Tyler, the Creato ... More >>

  • Blogs

    May 24, 2011

    Heat-Bulls Game 4/Election-Results Live Blog-a-palooza

    ​Big night in Miami tonight. On one side, the Miami Heat hosting the Chicago Bulls in Game 4 of the Eastern Conference Finals. On the other, the Miami-Dade elections. What's a good Miamian to do? Watch the game? Check on the election results?Well, don't fret, good citizen. Just stay with us t ... More >>

  • Blogs

    May 12, 2011

    LeBron James' Clutch Balls

    ​LeBron James has taken a lot of shit this year. Mainly because he decided to exercise his perfectly legal right to join another team through free agency. SO EVIL! And then he went and celebrated his signing with the Heat in front of the local fans with a fire works show. SO IMPERIOUS!He's also ha ... More >>

  • Blogs

    April 15, 2011

    The Heat's Road to the NBA Championship

    ​The day is almost here. After one of the most scrutinized regular seasons afforded to any team in just about all of NBA history the Miami Heat are set to platy their first play-off game with LeBron James and Chris Bosh joining Dwayne Wade in red and black tomorrow. They'll face off at home ag ... More >>

  • Blogs

    April 5, 2011

    Dwyane Wade Unveils His First Pair of Signature Air Jordans

    ​For the past two years, Dwyane Wade has been just about the only NBA superstar not to have his own signature sneaker. He traded his own line of Converse kicks and apparel to take the historic honor of being the first basketball-player spokesman for Nike's Air Jordan brand sinc ... More >>

  • Blogs

    March 15, 2011

    Heat Avenge 30-Point Loss to the Spurs With 30-Point Win

    ​Just ten days ago, the Miami Heat were in the midst of a five-game losing streak that included a season sweep at the hands of the Chicago Bulls and a press conference where head coach Erik Spoelstra told everyone that his players were crying after a loss. In the mix was also a 30-point loss to th ... More >>

  • Blogs

    January 27, 2011

    LeBron Increased Value of Heat by 17%, Dropped Cavs' by 26%

    ​The Miami Heat may be the most talked about NBA team this season, but they aren't the most valuable. However, the signing of LeBron James and Chris Bosh saw the team's value increase by 17 percent since last year, according to That's the biggest increase in value over one year in the ... More >>

  • Blogs

    January 17, 2011

    Bosh, Wade and James All Sit Out Practice With Injuries

    ​How exactly would the Miami Heat play without Dwyane Wade, Chris Bosh or LeBron James? Like the reigning champs of a retirement community's summer league? Like an especially hairy WNBA team? Like the '07-'08 Heat, who went Wade-less much of the season and finished with the worst record in the NBA ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 14, 2010

    Miami Heat Already Have Shot at One NBA Record

    ​Unless the Heat somehow manage to only drop two games the rest of the regular season, the hopes that the team can match the '96 Chicago Bulls 72-win season may have to wait until at least next season. Though, the streaking squad is already knocking on the door at meeting or beating another NB ... More >>

  • Blogs

    October 19, 2010

    LeBron James Issues South Beach Edition Sneakers

    LeBron James didn't just take his talents to South Beach, he brought Nike's design team along with him apparently. The newest Nike Air Max LeBron 8 kicks come in a special edition "South Beach" color way which, of course, means they're bright turquoise and hot pink. They're fresher than a new coat o ... More >>

  • News

    September 2, 2010

    LeBron James and crazy quotes

    Dumb things people have said since the baller signed with the Heat.

  • Blogs

    August 31, 2010

    The Craziest Things Said During the Summer of LeBron

    ​LeBron James tore a hole in the fabric of the universe when he announced on live television he was joining the Miami Heat. And wow, did people say some really dumb/crazy things about it. Here's our compendium, in roughly chronological form, of the looniest and most mind-melting quotes from the Su ... More >>

  • Calendar

    July 8, 2010
  • Blogs

    March 26, 2010

    News Roundup: Estefan Joined by Other Singers in Little Havana March

    Gloria Estefan led a march in support of Cuban dissidents yesterday and was joined by Pitbull, Willy Chirino, Natalia Jimenez, and Luis Fonsi. [AP]A Miami woman is charged with trying to drown her two kids and commit suicide in a local park: "A witness told police she saw the woman on the seawa ... More >>

  • Calendar

    February 25, 2010
  • Calendar

    April 3, 2008

    Almost Done

    Heat sans Wade, Riley, or any other recognizable face.

  • Calendar

    April 13, 2006
  • Calendar

    December 1, 2005

    Rebound King

    Dennis Rodman shows his private parts

  • Calendar

    May 4, 2000

    B-Ball's Man

    Michael Jordan to the Max

  • Music

    October 3, 1996
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