Channing Crowder

Are You Smarter Than a Miami Dolphin?

The Party Crasher - Grand Opening Party of The Park Sports Club

Ex-Dolphins All Up In the Super Bowl

Dolphins Lose, Pennington Sucks

Don't Be Afraid to Make Them Punt or Anything

The Patriots punted once in the entire game during yesterday's 48-28 win over the Dolphins. Once. New England's offense totaled 530 yards -- the most the Dolphins defense has allowed since 1995. You could still catch brand new episodes of Seinfeld the last time the Dolphins allowed that many yards. ... More >>

News Roundup

LocalGetting laid off individually is so trite. The new trend is to be part of a mass layoff. Unfortunately, all of your friends are doing it. [Herald]We're number one! This time in highest health-care costs in the nation. [Herald]Miami Commissioner Marc Sarnoff will bring up a resolution at today's ... More >>

Ra Sushi Introduces "Fins Roll" for Dolfans, But Is It Worth $12?

image via Ra SushiGet your roll on​What's teal and orange and goes down easy? No, unfortunately we're not talking about the Dolphins cheerleaders, we're talking about the new "Fins Roll" at Ra Sushi.It's an eight-piece spicy lobster roll topped with fresh salmon and avocado, drizzled in spicy mayo ... More >>

Gag Green

image via Ra SushiGet your roll on​What's teal and orange and goes down easy? No, unfortunately we're not talking about the Dolphins cheerleaders, we're talking about the new "Fins Roll" at Ra Sushi.It's an eight-piece spicy lobster roll topped with fresh salmon and avocado, drizzled in spicy mayo ... More >>

News Roundup

A local wedding dress shop owner gave away 100 wedding dresses to brides who just lost their job. [Herald]Manny Diaz's plan to remake Virginia Key has been pushed back, meaning it won't come to fruition while he's in office. [Herald]Carnival is coming to Downtown Miami this weekend. [SFLTimes]Channi ... More >>

Miami Dolphins Preview: Grudge Match

​Tonight is the Judgment Day, Hour of Reckoning, massively hysterical, Road to Armageddon, cats-and-dogs-living-together apocalyptic showdown between the Dolphins and Jets at Land Shark Stadium. Here are three key factors:1. Rex Ryan Knows How to Stop the Wildcat, Can Eat an Entire X ... More >>

Channing Crowder On The Saints: "Probably Smelling Themselves, Rubbing Each Other's Balls"

via Deuce of DavenportThe downside of tattoos is that there's no denying when pictures like these hit the web.​The Dolphin's Joey Porter hasn't quite lived up to his trash talker potential this season, probably due to injury, but that's okay because it seems linebacker Channing Crowder is more tha ... More >>

News Roundup

Here's how The Herald cleaned up Channing Crowder's "They're undefeated, they're probably smelling themselves, rubbing each other's balls, all that shit..." quote: "They're probably smelling themselves, rubbing each other's [back]." Come on, since when is back a proper substitute for balls? [Herald] ... More >>

Miami Dolphins Implode Against New Orleans Saints

​When a team leads 24-10 at the half while having forced three turnovers, combined for five sacks and rushed for 128 yards and four touchdowns, that team will, more often than not, end up the victor. But this is the Miami Dolphins. Normal rules need not apply. This is Suck Country. The Fins could ... More >>

Top Ten Ways Ted Ginn Can Repay the City of Miami

For a more thorough and humorous review of every Miami Dolphins player who shat himself during yesterday's 46-34 loss to the New Orleans Saints, see Chris Joseph's post from this morning. I care only about my boy, Ted Ginn, Jr., who managed to sneak past Darrelle Revis two weeks ago against the Jets ... More >>

Ten ways Ted Ginn Jr. can repay Miami for the Dolphins' loss to the Saints

For a more thorough and humorous review of every Miami Dolphins player who shat himself during yesterday's 46-34 loss to the New Orleans Saints, see Chris Joseph's post from this morning. I care only about my boy, Ted Ginn, Jr., who managed to sneak past Darrelle Revis two weeks ago against the Jets ... More >>

Miami Dolphins Lose: Hauntingly Familiar

​When Vontae Davis started off the game with a leaping interception that can only be described as Fuck Yea!, the consensus feeling was the Dolphins were going to make this one interesting. Maybe even pull off the upset. Alas, it was not to be. The Patriots were able to show us, once again, that th ... More >>

Miami Dolphins Win: Never Say Die!

​Just when you thought they were good and dead, the Miami Dolphins pull off one of the most satisfying, Scarlett-Johansson's-knockers-in-your-face awesome victories of the 2009 season. It came thanks in large part to Chad Henne, Vontae Davis, and a Dolphins team that simply won't die.On their firs ... More >>

Miami Dolphins' Tony Sparano is a conservative coach who takes huge risks

​Just when you thought they were good and dead, the Miami Dolphins pull off one of the most satisfying, Scarlett-Johansson's-knockers-in-your-face awesome victories of the 2009 season. It came thanks in large part to Chad Henne, Vontae Davis, and a Dolphins team that simply won't die.On their firs ... More >>

News Roundup: It Dropped Below 50 Degrees, Emergency!

The Coast Guard called off the search for two boaters who went missing of the coast. [NBCMiami]It got really really cold yesterday, how cold was it? Apparently cold enough to warrant this long article. [Herald]Kool & the Gang performed in Cuba on Saturday. Our apologies to th ... More >>

Drink Up Tonight's Heat Game 3 with T.O. Michael Beasley and Lawrence Taylor

Photo: Marc Serota​NFL greats Terrell Owens, Lawrence Taylor, Channing Crowder, Ray Buchanan and Matthew Hatchette will show up on a commercial for Title Sports Drink during tonight's game three of the Miami Heat playoff game -- and on the draft shows starting today on  ESPN and the NF ... More >>

Miami Dolphins Draft Wrap-up

​The Miami Dolphins entered the NFL draft with a plethora of needs, most notably at outside linebacker, safety, nose tackle and tight end. They spent their first pick on a defensive end, while pulling the ole switch-a-roo on us and moving Randy Starks to the defensive tackle position. PING! Defens ... More >>

Channing Crowder "Couldn't Give A Damn" About Pleasing Dolphins Fans

via Deuce of DavenportGo choke on a poison apple, Crowder.With Joey Porter long gone Channing Crowder took the spot of the Dolphin's top trash talker. Now with Tedd Ginn Jr. out of the way (thankfully), The Sun-Sentinel's Omar Kelly seems worried that Crowder could also take the place of the fanbase ... More >>

Dolphins Receiver's Truck Found Crashed and Abandoned on I-595

​According to the Palm Beach Post, a pickup truck belonging to Miami Dolphins receiver Brian Hartline was found crashed and abandoned on I-595 earlier this month. Authorities say Hartline's truck crashed into another abandoned vehicle that was parked on the side of I-595 in the early-morning ... More >>

Dolphins Rookie A.J. Edds Blows Out Knee

​Things had been running pretty smoothly for the Miami Dolphins since training camp began last Friday. Chad Henne is looking sharp, Will Allen is looking fluid, and newly acquired Pro Bowl wide receiver Brandon Marshall is downright blowing shit up. But all the good times and double rainbows came ... More >>

Your Miami Dolphins 2010 Football Season Preview

TARGET ACQUIRED!​Are you ready for our completely meaningless and arbitrary predictions for the upcoming Dolphins season? Well this is it. The Riptide 2.0 Miami Dolphins 2010 Football Season Preview. Are you ready to get your ass blown off with some seriously capricious and utterly subjective prog ... More >>

Miami Dolphins Rookie Jared Odrick Could Be Out a Month

​It appears that the Miami Dolphins have lost first-round pick Jared Odrick for a month, maybe more. Odrick, the Dolphins' rookie staring defensive end, suffered a hairline fracture in his right fibula during last Sunday's game against Buffalo. The Dolphins won't discuss the outcome of an MRI take ... More >>

Defeat the Douchebags

​It appears that the Miami Dolphins have lost first-round pick Jared Odrick for a month, maybe more. Odrick, the Dolphins' rookie staring defensive end, suffered a hairline fracture in his right fibula during last Sunday's game against Buffalo. The Dolphins won't discuss the outcome of an MRI take ... More >>

Gisele Bündchen Comes to Town to Root for Tom Brady's Hair

via JustJared​Normally, thanks to their semi-ridiculous effort to enlist B-listers as co-owners the Miami Dolphins have the biggest star power in their rooting section. That's not true when the New England Patriots come to town and Tom Brady brings his wifey Gisele Bundchen. The Brazilian sup ... More >>

Dolphins Get Hosed, Lose Heartbreaker to the Steelers

​Just when you think the Miami Dolphins can't get screwed any harder. Just when you think this team has seen the worst of its ball-clobbering misfortune, comes a loss like yesterday's 23-22 cockpunch against the Pittsburgh Steelers. Not only did the officiating crew take a monumental shit on the D ... More >>

NFL Is Too Soft For the Rest Of the World

​Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness once made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke addresses the NFL's crackdown on helmet-to-helmet hits.The No Fun League needs to stop fining defensive players for helme ... More >>

NFL helmet hits are OK

​Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness once made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke addresses the NFL's crackdown on helmet-to-helmet hits.The No Fun League needs to stop fining defensive players for helme ... More >>

Dolphins Suffer First Road Loss

​The Miami Dolphins lost their first road game of the season Sunday, falling 26-10 to the Baltimore Ravens, a team that is exactly like the Dolphins in every way except without all the interceptions and missed tackles and special teams blunders and dropped passes. The Dolphins are now 4-4 on the s ... More >>

Dolphins Say They'll Submit Video Showing McClain Spitting on Crowder to the League

​Despite giving up over 400 yards in Sunday's loss to the Ravens, along with throwing three interceptions, scoring only one touchdown, and not forcing Baltimore to punt all game long, the most important news item for the Dolphins remains that Channing Crowder got spit on in the face by Ravens full ... More >>

Miami Wins, Jets Coach Intentionally Trips Dolphins Player

​If you like low scoring games with shitloads of punting, dropped touchdown passes, coaches tripping players running down the sideline, corner backs with hands of stone, and really repulsive quarterback play, then Sunday's showdown between the Miami Dolphins and New York Jets was right up your all ... More >>

David Letterman Rips Jets' Trip-happy Coach in Top Ten List

​Jets strength training coach Sal Alosi has already been fined and suspended for the trip seen 'round the world. Though, it's likely he'll never be able to totally live it down completely. While sports blogs, ESPN talking heads, and, of course, Channing Crowder have already ripped into the guy, la ... More >>

Channing Crowder Hints He May Have Sold Memorabilia at UF

​The Ohio State Buckeyes are still reeling from a memorabilia-for-tattoos scandal that caused coach Jim Tressel to resign and star quarterback Terrelle Pryor to leave for the pros. Though, there's plenty of people out there who don't think the idea of players selling or trading memorabilia is all ... More >>

Dolphins Cut Channing Crowder

​So long, Channing Crowder. According to CBS Miami, the Dolphins have cut the always entertaining linebacker. A former Florida Gator, Crowder was drafted by the Fins in 2005 and has played his entire pro career in Miami.

Ten Things Channing Crowder Can Do Now That He's Retired

​After six seasons with the Miami Dolphins, Channing Crowder has announced his retirement from football after being cut from the team last month. Yet Crowder is only 27 and has his entire life in front of him. It's not too late for our favorite Fins loudmouth to find a new passion in life, and we' ... More >>

Channing Crowder Rips Chad Henne, Plans to Get Drunk at Dolphins Games

​Though he announced his retirement last week, former Miami Dolphin Channing Crowder says he is open to returning to the game next season after the birth of his first child. Don't expect the Fins to come calling. Bridges have been burned. He ripped both quarterback Chad Henne and general mana ... More >>

Channing Crowder: "I Don't Like Henne... I Just Don't Like the Guy"

Sure, Channing Crowder is no longer a member of the Miami Dolphins, but he seems to be determined to keep his position as the team's biggest loudmouth. The temporarily "retired" linebacker was on the Joe Rose Show this morning on WQAM and unleashed some harsh words for Dolphins QB Chad Hen ... More >>