Chad Ochocinco

South Street Closes

South Street Restaurant & Bar, the Motown-inspired restaurant in the Design District, has closed. The restaurant's Facebook page simply states, "South Street is closed... STAY TUNED FOR WHAT'S NEXT." The phone at the restaurant went unanswered at 7:15 last night, and a call to sister restaurant Gig ... More >>

Chad Johnson Sues Websites That Leaked Pics of His Sex Tape

As if things couldn't get worse for ex-NFLer Chad Johnson, Santa delivered some coal in his stocking on Christmas day in the form of pictures taken from a leaked sex time posted online. Johnson, who was kicked off the Dolphins roster this fall after a high profile domestic violence arrest, has now f ... More >>

Miami New Times' Dirty Dozen 2012

Bad Week For Ex-Dolphins: Chad Johnson's Sex Tape Leaks, Joey Porter Goes To Jail

The Miami Dolphins didn't have the best Christmas week: Despite smothering the Bills on Sunday, they were knocked out of the playoffs yet again when the Bengals later won. But the team can at least take comfort that their holidays weren't nearly as awful as two former Fins stars.Loudmouth linebacker ... More >>

Chad Johnson Pleads Not Guilty to Domestic Battery Charge

This morning former Miami Dolphins wide receiver Chad Johnson pleaded not guilty to charges that he head butted his estranged wife Evelyn Lozada after the two got into an argument when she found a receipt for condoms in his car. The Broward State Attorney's Office had officially filed the misdemeano ... More >>

Chad Johnson Gets Evelyn Lozada's Face Tattooed on His Leg

So, um, yeah, this seems awkward and kind of unhealthy. Weeks after being arrested for assaulting his wife Evelyn Lozada, after which she promptly filed for divorce, former Dolphin Chad Johnson decided to get a giant tattoo of Lozada's face on his leg.

Chad Johnson Says He'll Do Porn If He's Cut From the Dolphins

Chad Ochocinco Johnson promised he'd go back to his old loudmouthed, impulsive ways when he became a Dolphin, and he's keeping that promise.Johnson says that if he doesn't make the Dolphins' final squad, he'll consider a career in porn.Oh, and he also said he's been hanging out with Kiss frontm ... More >>

Chad Ochocinco Johnson Promises to Be a Giant Loud Mouth This Year

Oh, thank Football Jesus! No, not you Tim Tebow. The real one. Whoever it is that answers our prayers.Chad Johnson may have changed his name back to something decidedly less crazy, but that doesn't mean he's all the sudden going to become the picture of maturity. He says that part of the reason he d ... More >>

Chad Ochocinco Is Now Chad Johnson Once Again

Sadly, the name Chad Ochocinco will never appear on a Dolphins jersey. That's because the wide receiver has changed his moniker back to his birth name, Chad Johnson. It's fitting, we guess, as he'll be playing his first professional season in his hometown of Miami. Yet, somehow we're disappointed as ... More >>

Jeffrey Loria and Stephen Ross Can Learn a Lot From Micky Arison

Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke says the Heat is the number one franchise in Miami.Jeffrey Loria and Stephen Ross need to set up a powwow with Micky Arison and P ... More >>

Miami Dolphins Replace Playbooks with iPads, Will Fine Players $10,000 for Improper Use

In a move that will save thousands of pieces of paper a year, the Miami Dolphins have stepped into the digital age and will replace their phonebook-sized paper playbooks this year with iPads. Each player was issued the Apple tablet. Though, that of course means players might be tempted to load up An ... More >>

Dolphins Players Not Thrilled About Being Filmed for Hard Knocks

Are you excited to take a behind the scenes look at the Miami Dolphins on HBO's Hard Knocks? Because the players sure aren't.  Tight end Anthony Fasano says groans echoed through the locker room when the team was informed they'd be pulling double duty as reality TV stars.

Six Best Club Parties on South Beach This Weekend

Win free tickets for Afrojack's Jacked Summer Tour at Mansion. The Marlins are barely over .500 and still six games back in the NL East. The Heat trail the Oklahoma City Thunder by a game in the NBA Finals and the Dolphins just signed Chad Ochocinco. Clearly, there's a lot to be upset about, Miam ... More >>

Chad Ochocinco Signs With the Dolphins, Tweets in Spanish

In a serious bid to bolster their Hard Knocks reality show ratings -- and an outside chance to firm up the wide receiver position a little -- the Miami Dolphins reportedly signed hometown class clown Chad Ochocinco last night. Ochocinco celebrated the best way he knew how: Updating his Twitter avata ... More >>

Dolphins Might Sign Chad Ochocinco

Chad Ochocinco was born in Miami and played for Miami Beach Senior High. His career may be about to come full circle, as the Dolphins are seriously exploring the possibility of signing the most interesting man in the NFL. Based solely on potential blog post fodder, Riptide approves of this move.

Chad Ochocinco Got Peed On By a Lion This Weekend

​Guess the lion was a Dolphins fan.Miami native, (ugh) current New England Patriot player, and possibly the most interesting football player in the world Chad Ochocinco put on his good clothes and decided to head out for a charity function in Miami Beach on Saturday. This of course being Miami, la ... More >>

Is Chad Ochocinco the Prince of the NFL?

​We don't mean "prince," as in "heir to the throne." (Though that would be awesome -- imagine how the game would be played under NFL Commissioner Ochocinco.) We mean Prince, as in "Party Like It's 1999," Purple Rain, and that un-pronounceable symbol that earned him so much ridicule back in the day ... More >>

Chad Ochocinco Shops at Urban Outfitters; We Offer Our Styling Suggestions

​We at Cultist must confess a certain fondness for Urban Outfitters, purveyors of ironic tees, man-repelling women's attire, and hipster gadgets of all sorts. There's something comforting and innocent about the atmosphere inside the store, like being wrapped in a warm blanket of nonchalance and id ... More >>

Basketball Wives' Evelyn Lozada Sues Media Take Out for Claiming She Slept With Terrell Owens

Media Take Out is basically the wild, wild West of Internet gossip. "The most visited urban website in the world" trades freely in outrageous claims. OK, its top headlines right now include questioning Tupac's heterosexuality, praising Kanye's oral sex technique, and implying that Busta Rhymes has h ... More >>

Kiki-ing and Screaming

Wiz Khalifa Broke Hip-Hop Code

Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness once made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke explains why Wiz Khalifa shouldn't settle for Kanye West's sloppy seconds.Wiz Khalifa needs to have his head examined. The b ... More >>

Thursday Night's Top Five Memorial Day Weekend Parties

Photo by Ivon David Rojas​Memorial Day weekend is officially here. And you know what that means? More ass on the beach than grains of sand, so much liquor you can't feel your face, and so many parties you can't even decide where to wild out without help from Crossfade.Kick your Thursday night of ... More >>

Chad Ochocinco to Try Out for Pro Soccer Team

Ochocinco and soccer star Christiano Ronaldo​Giving that Chad Ochocinco grew up in soccer-loving Miami, it's no surprise that he used to play the sport in his youth, but the colorful Cincinnati Bengals wide receiver is know more for his skills with his hands than his feet. Now, in the face of an N ... More >>

Chad Ochocinco Rolls Through South Beach in Super Truck, Ditching the "Ochocinco"

via Bossip​Chad Ochocinco isn't known for subtlety. The guy can't even catch lunch at the relatively low key David's Cafe II on South Beach without a healthy helping of ridiculous. Yeah, the Miami native plowed through the back streets of South Beach in a giant gas-guzzling "super-truck" this ... More >>

Bill Clinton Ate Dinner With Cameron Diaz Then Went to Ochocinco's Birthday Party

​South Beach apparently has a hot new party it boy, and his name is former President Bill Clinton. Yes, Bubba hit up the town last night in grand fashion. First, he dined with Cameron Diaz and Alex Rodriguez at Prime One Twelve before crashing football loony Chad Ochocinco's star-studded birthday ... More >>

Dolphins Beat Bengals to Remain Perfect On The Road

​The Miami Dolphins remain perfect on the road after traveling into Cincinnati and taking down the Bengals 22-14 on Sunday. They're now 4-0 on the road, and 4-3 on the season. That's the good news. The bad news? The Dolphins offense flat out refuses to score touchdowns. Dan Carpenter just kicked a ... More >>

Is Chad Ochocinco's Pigeon-Birthing Saga a Fraud?

Liberty City native and Cincinnati Bengals star Chad Ochocinco has been tweeting up a storm about the bizarre saga of his pregnant pigeon. He even expressed frustration upon learning that pigeons lay eggs and do not give live birth. Today he tweeted pictures of the newly hatched pigeon babies. Probl ... More >>

Halie305: Miami Video Vixen and Chad Ochocinco's Ultimate Catch

2 Starz Studio​If you've paid attention to recent hip-hop videos or maybe even watched VH1, then you've probably seen Halie, AKA Halie305, AKA Heather from The Ultimate Catch. A curvaceous 36-25-41 beauty from Miami, Halie's appearance (as Heather) on VH1's summer reality dating series s ... More >>

Chad Ochocinco's Pregnant Pigeon "Gives Birth," Upset When Only Eggs Pop Out

via TwitPicOchocinco's pet pigeon: "Fuck exotic birds i got an exotic pigeon, she's pit bull blue with red eyes, that's exotic! !!"​Somewhere on the list of facts everyone should know comes "birds lay eggs." That's probably just after "the sky is blue" and "the earth is round" on the obvious scale ... More >>

Chad Ochocinco's Cereal Tells Kids to Call Phone Sex Line

​In and of itself, the fact that Liberty City native and Cincinnati Bengal's star Chad Ochocinco has a breakfast cereal called OchocincO's is ridiculous enough. Of course, this being Ochocinco, the ridiculousness doesn't end there. The box implores consumers to call a phone number where they can h ... More >>

One Party United Under Hip-Hop

​Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness once made the Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke starts a worldwide political movement.Around this time last year, undercover racist movement Take America Back began to take s ... More >>

Tweets of the Week: Dolphins Player Thinks You're Gay If You Own a Blackberry

​This week's athlete heavy Twitter roundup includes Kory Sheet's take on the sexual proclivities of blackberry users, a Marlins player's chill new faux hawk, LeBron's love of college football. Also, the only Republican left who supports gay rights wins an award from a gay Republican group, and som ... More >>

LeBron James Is Now the Sixth Most Hated Athlete in America

​It's pretty clear that everyone else in the nation hates LeBron James and the Miami Heat, but now we have cold, hard numbers to back it up. The Q Score company gauges favor-ability rankings of various athletes, and after reaching a peak high of popularity last year, James is now the sixth most ha ... More >>

Dolphins Player Lost His $50,000 Earring at Practice, But Ochocinco is Coming to the Rescue

​The NFL season hasn't even begun yet, and the Dolphins are already embarrassing themselves on the field. Defensive end Kendall Langford lost a 2.5 caret diamond earring (honey, those must be fierce) and had about nine fellow Fins searching the ground for the bling.If only the Fins would work so h ... More >>

Chad Ochocinco To Appear on Basketball Wives, Dating Evelyn Lozada

​Liberty City-native Chad Ochocinco failed to find love with his own VH1 reality show, but as luck would have it he's apparently found love another star from the channel's reality TV line-up: Basketball Wives' Evelyn Lozada, the ex-fiancé of former Heat player Antoine Walker and owner of a s ... More >>

Ricky Williams Wants a Reality Show, But What Should it Be?

​Dolphins running back Ricky Williams is looking for a way to pay down some his debts and is reportedly in talks with the production company behind Chad Ochocinco's VH1 dating show to star in a reality show. No word on what the format will be, but since he got hitched last year, we doubt there'll ... More >>

Ochocinco Reminds Ohio They Still have Ochocinco, Wants to Find Someone to Go to Red Lobster With

​OK, people of Ohio, we're sorry we took your home-state superhero. But buck up -- you still lay claim to one of the best Miami-bred players in the NFL: Chad Ochocinco.Of course, Ochocinco continues to prove you can take the boy out of Miami, but you can't take the Miami out of the boy.

Rumor: LeBron Flying to Miami Tonight; Fact: Spoelstra Likely to Remain Heat Coach

​Even with a major piece of the NBA free-agency puzzle being settled this morning, rumors continue to fly while others are put to rest. That one about Pat Riley reinstating himself as coach of the Heat? As far as Chris Bosh has heard, current coach Eric Spoelstra is staying put. That one about LeB ... More >>

The Top Five Divas in South Florida Sports

The sports world is in full freak-out mode over Marlins shortstop Hanley Ramirez displaying legendary laziness in botching a play and then lashing out at manager Fredi Gonzalez for benching him. Never before have scribes busted out this many synonyms for half-ass performance-- loafing, lollygagg ... More >>

Move Over, Chad Ochocinco, Robert Battle Is Liberty City's Best Dancer

Of the many things Chad Ochocinco has given us, the best is clearly his T-Rex end-zone dance. Since then, he has taken his crazy dinosaur shuffle to Dancing With the Stars, where it's working really well for him. He's one of the five z-list celebrities still in the running!​ But he's been dethrone ... More >>

Basketball Wives: Ochocinco Throws the Worst Parties Ever

​There are a slew of talented NFL players from Miami we usually don't care too much about on Riptide unless they happen to play for the Canes or the Dolphins. Chad Ochocinco is the big exception. He is, after all, the most interesting football player in the world. He's practically a hero to us. Bu ... More >>

Chad Ochocinco Set for VH1 Dating Show, Promises Lady Gaga-esque Dancing Costumes

When Liberty City's Chad Ochocinco does something, he doesn't half-ass it. Especially when that something is utterly ridiculous. The man changed his last name to Ochocinco, after all.So when it was announced he'd make the inevitable jump to reality TV by being a contestant on Dancing With the S ... More >>

Chad Ochocinco Joins Dancing With The Stars With Pamela Anderson and Kate Gosselin

​It's really a wonder that somehow the one-man entertainment machine known as Chad Ochocinco has not been on a reality tv show yet. If there's a single player in the NFL who was made for trash television it's him. He is, after all, Esteban: the most interesting football player in the world.Well, i ... More >>

Chad Ochocinco Adds Another Notch in His Career Belt: Media Day Hack

Photo by Tim Elfrink Is that Ron Burgandy? Nope. Ochocinco reports live from Sun Life Stadium.Chad Ochocinco hasn't yet accecpted New Times' informal offer to write a 10,000-word odyssey/cover story about wearing Snuggies at McDonald's and living a double life as Esteban the Most In ... More >>

Chad Ochocinco Appears to Be Enjoying This Week's Miami Festivities

Yes, he's wearing a Snuggie.​We've long known Cincinatti wide receiver and Miami native Chad Ochocinco has a somewhat colorful personality -- we were sort of tipped off when he legally changed his last name to a bad Spanish translation of his jersey number -- but he seems to be really coming into ... More >>

The iPad: Is It Good News for the Miami Herald? Bad News for Us? No One Knows

via GizmodoiOcho​The first image most people will ever see of Apple's recently unveiled iPad displays Liberty City's own Chad Ochocinco. Interesting, but perhaps more important is that the image was party of the New York Times' app for the new machine. For months, rumors swirled that the iPad woul ... More >>

Super Bowl Strip Club Debauchery: Disco Rick Teaches You How to Politely Make it Rain

He's mellowed a lot.​Not sure if you heard, but the Super Bowl's coming to Miami. Since the Dolphins didn't make it, we care nothing about the on-field contest. Far more intriguing is the galaxy of debauchery that will be descending on our innocent city for the big weekend -- including almos ... More >>

Our Balls Are Oblong

Miami readies for another Michelle Spence-Jones acceptance speech

We Wait With Bated Breath for Michelle Spence-Jones's Next Acceptance Speech

​The best part about suspended City of Miami Commissioner Michelle Spence-Jones's preordained re-election to her vacated seat is this: She'll be able to make another acceptance speech.Her defiant diatribe a few weeks ago -- when she took office moments before being cuffed and booked on grand theft ... More >>