Carlos Boozer

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Blogs
April 13, 2012
Heat Get Nothing From Bench, Lose to Bulls in OT
Holy shit bananas, that was rough.The Miami Heat dropped a gut-wrenching loss to the Chicago Bulls 96-86 in overtime last night.And while the game is meaningless in terms of overall playoff importance, it still feels like Heat fans got their collective cocks slammed in a Metrobus door. WILL SOMEONE ... More >>
Blogs
October 20, 2011
James, Wade, and Bosh to Take Their Talents Overseas
The Miami Heat's big three are reportedly ready to pack their bags and head on a six-city international tour with a host of other NBA superstars during what would have been the first two weeks of the NBA season. Plans are still being worked out, but between October 30 and November the 9, the ... More >>
Blogs
May 27, 2011
Eastern Conference Champions! F%$# Yea!
Every single person that has ever uttered or written or tweeted or thought the word "LeBrick" can help themselves to a dick chipotle. Because with 3:12 remaining in the game, and the Heat down by 12, LeBron James obliterated the Chicago Bulls' vaunted defense like an ass-kicking machine with the ... More >>
Blogs
May 23, 2011
Don't Make Chris Bosh Angry
The Miami Heat took down the tough Chicago Bulls 96-85 in an Eastern Conference Finals Game 3 that featured tough defense, gay slurs, Miami fans berating Charles Barkley, LeBron James obliterating Kyle Korver, and Chris Bosh exploding all over Chicago's face. The Heat now have a 2-1 lead in the b ... More >>
Blogs
May 19, 2011
Chicago Bulls Have A Hollering Advantage Over the Miami Heat
Because this is the NBA and we do a lot of screaming around here!Which team will win the Eastern Conference Finals won't come down to how great the Miami Heat's big three perform or how wonderfully efficient the Chicago Bulls' bench mob execute their tenacious defensive and rebounding skills. No ... More >>
Blogs
May 19, 2011
Udonis Haslem and His Amazing Feats of Awesome
In Game 1 of the Eastern Conference finals, the Miami Heat had zero answers for the Chicago Bulls and their insane rebounding prowess, sharp shooting, monster dunks and screamy faces. But in last night's Game 2, the Heat answered with the one-two punch of LeBron James and the ball obliterating re ... More >>
Blogs
May 16, 2011
The Heat Still Can't Beat the Bulls, or Grab a Rebound
Well that was rough. Apparently Chicago Bulls head coach Tom Thibodeau screened Hoosiers for his team while Miami Heat head coach Erik Spoelstra showed his guys Atlas Shrugged prior to their Game 1 Eastern Conference Finals showdown. Because the Heat were out muscled, and out-hustled by ... More >>
News
October 28, 2010
LeBron jerseys for Miami's homeless, courtesy of New Times
Well that was rough. Apparently Chicago Bulls head coach Tom Thibodeau screened Hoosiers for his team while Miami Heat head coach Erik Spoelstra showed his guys Atlas Shrugged prior to their Game 1 Eastern Conference Finals showdown. Because the Heat were out muscled, and out-hustled by ... More >>
Blogs
February 22, 2010
News Roundup: Fins' Will Allen Gets Douchiest DUI Ever
Sources tell CBS4 that businessman Carlos Migoya will be named Miami's new city manager. [CBS4]11 wild horses in Hialeah were captured this weekend. [CBS4]Kim Rothstein was still collecting rent on houses that had been forfeited to the government. [NBCMiami]SportsDolphins cornerb ... More >>
Blogs
February 18, 2010
Looks Like Amar'e Stoudemire Might Not Be Coming to Miami ...Yet, But Boozer May
by Keith Allison via WikiCommons cc2.0With the NBA trade deadline less than an hour away, it seems that Phoenix Sun star Amar'e Stoudemire will not be making a mid-season move to Miami. Our brethren at the Phoenix New Times report that any Stoudemire trade is "unlikely. ... More >>
Blogs
February 18, 2010
No Boozer or Big Trade for Miami; Wade's OK, But Will He Stay?
It was already clear that we wouldn't be getting Amar'e, but last minute rumors that The Heat might be landing Carlos Boozer from the Utah Jazz appeared to be unfounded."That was like, huh, what?'' Jazz general manager Kevin O'Connor said this afternoon, according to the Deseret News.So that means n ... More >>
Calendar
February 18, 2010
Sometimes No Move Is the Best Move of All
It was already clear that we wouldn't be getting Amar'e, but last minute rumors that The Heat might be landing Carlos Boozer from the Utah Jazz appeared to be unfounded."That was like, huh, what?'' Jazz general manager Kevin O'Connor said this afternoon, according to the Deseret News.So that means n ... More >>
Calendar
December 17, 2009
To Booz or Not to Booz?
It was already clear that we wouldn't be getting Amar'e, but last minute rumors that The Heat might be landing Carlos Boozer from the Utah Jazz appeared to be unfounded."That was like, huh, what?'' Jazz general manager Kevin O'Connor said this afternoon, according to the Deseret News.So that means n ... More >>
Blogs
October 30, 2009
Top Five Dream Miami Heat Lineups for 2010
Photo by Keith Allison, via FlickrRunning off the pure optimism of Wednesday night's opening beat-down of the New York Knicks, I present to you the top five Miami Heat starting lineups for the 2010-2011 season.As most fans know, the Heat will have perhaps the best cap space situation in the leag ... More >>
Blogs
August 25, 2009
RE: Beasley's Tweet-cident: Time for Riley and Wade to Step Up
WikicommonsThe Miami Heat's Michael Beasley clearly has a lot of emotional problems, which were well-documented even before a bunch of people thought they saw some weed in a self-taken Twitter photo this past weekend. How extensive these problems are I can't possibly speculate. But onl ... More >>
Blogs
July 21, 2009
News Roundup
Miami-Dade Mayor Carlos Alvarez has picked a real joker to run the housing agency. Seriously, he's a part-time stand-up comedian, but he used to do the same job in San Fran, so he's qualified to run a housing agency. [Herald]Another weird FCAT tale: A school that specializes in teaching critically ... More >>
Blogs
July 15, 2009
Bring Lamar Odom Back to Miami
WikicommonsReports this morning say L.A. Lakers owner Jerry Buss has withdrawn his offer to NBA forward Lamar Odom after Odom's agent didn't contact Buss with an answer. The offer was for four years/$36 million or three years/$30 million. Apparently, Odom is holding out for a five-year/$50 million d ... More >>
Blogs
July 1, 2008
NBA Free Agency Starts Today But Everyone Knows It Really Starts in 2010
WikicommonsReports this morning say L.A. Lakers owner Jerry Buss has withdrawn his offer to NBA forward Lamar Odom after Odom's agent didn't contact Buss with an answer. The offer was for four years/$36 million or three years/$30 million. Apparently, Odom is holding out for a five-year/$50 million d ... More >>
Blogs
June 24, 2008
No Reason Not to Draft Beasley
WikicommonsReports this morning say L.A. Lakers owner Jerry Buss has withdrawn his offer to NBA forward Lamar Odom after Odom's agent didn't contact Buss with an answer. The offer was for four years/$36 million or three years/$30 million. Apparently, Odom is holding out for a five-year/$50 million d ... More >>
Calendar
December 20, 2007
Bottling Boozer
WikicommonsReports this morning say L.A. Lakers owner Jerry Buss has withdrawn his offer to NBA forward Lamar Odom after Odom's agent didn't contact Buss with an answer. The offer was for four years/$36 million or three years/$30 million. Apparently, Odom is holding out for a five-year/$50 million d ... More >>
Music
January 25, 2007
The Week in Weird
Sax fiend Kenny G to wed all five members of Agnostic Front!
Year End
December 23, 2004
Up From the Underworld
This year, blood-soaked extreme metal took its rightful place in the world of heavy music.

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