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Blogs
March 8, 2012
LeBron, Wade and Udonis Publicly Recruit Peyton Manning, Also Beat the Hawks
After struggling for most of last night's game against the Atlanta Hawks, the Miami Heat finally decided to stop dicking around and began to hit their shots and play their anaconda-style defense just in time to comeback from as much as 10 points and beat Atlanta 89-86.More importantly however, be ... More >>
Blogs
March 7, 2012
Chris Bosh Returns to the Heat, Proceeds to Destroy the Nets
Sure, it was the Nets. And sure, they're amongst the worst defenses in the NBA. But holy shitsnacks, it was awesome seeing Chris Bosh back in the Heat fold, dropping his silky smooth jumpers in honor of his dearly departed GloJean and turning Kris Humphries into a human-sized lump of coal in the ... More >>
Calendar
February 2, 2012
It’s a Mad, Mad Lyfe
Sure, it was the Nets. And sure, they're amongst the worst defenses in the NBA. But holy shitsnacks, it was awesome seeing Chris Bosh back in the Heat fold, dropping his silky smooth jumpers in honor of his dearly departed GloJean and turning Kris Humphries into a human-sized lump of coal in the ... More >>
Calendar
January 12, 2012
Zoned Out
Sure, it was the Nets. And sure, they're amongst the worst defenses in the NBA. But holy shitsnacks, it was awesome seeing Chris Bosh back in the Heat fold, dropping his silky smooth jumpers in honor of his dearly departed GloJean and turning Kris Humphries into a human-sized lump of coal in the ... More >>
Blogs
January 6, 2012
The Best Revenge is Revenge: Heat Take Down Hawks in 3OT Without James or Wade
Dwyane Wade, out with a sore left foot. LeBron James, out with a sprained left ankle. The Miami Heat, having to go into Atlanta undermanned, against a Hawks team that had just beaten them at home with James and Wade.Problem? Shit and no.Enter Chris Bosh. Bosh proceeded to trample any hopes Atlant ... More >>
Blogs
January 6, 2012
Charles Barkley, Weight Watchers Spokesperson, Calls Weight Watchers a "Scam"
During last night's triple overtime showdown between the Miami Heat and Atlanta Hawks, NBA Hall of Famer-turned-broadcaster Charles Barkley opened up about his new gig as Weight Watchers' celebrity spokesperson. During a first quarter commercial break, Barkley told his TNT comrades Reggie Mill ... More >>
Calendar
December 29, 2011
Back Where We Started
During last night's triple overtime showdown between the Miami Heat and Atlanta Hawks, NBA Hall of Famer-turned-broadcaster Charles Barkley opened up about his new gig as Weight Watchers' celebrity spokesperson. During a first quarter commercial break, Barkley told his TNT comrades Reggie Mill ... More >>
Blogs
September 27, 2011
Wade, James and Bosh to Host Charity All-Star Game at FIU
Dwyane Wade, LeBron James and Chris Bosh haven't played together since the last game of the NBA Finals, and with the lockout in full effect we weren't sure when it would happen again. That's about to change. The trio is expected to announce plan for a charity All-Star game at FIU on Octobe ... More >>
Blogs
May 12, 2011
LeBron James' Clutch Balls
LeBron James has taken a lot of shit this year. Mainly because he decided to exercise his perfectly legal right to join another team through free agency. SO EVIL! And then he went and celebrated his signing with the Heat in front of the local fans with a fire works show. SO IMPERIOUS!He's also ha ... More >>
Blogs
April 11, 2011
Heat Beat Celtics, Take No. 2. Seed
LeAss Beatin'Entering this season, the expectation for the Miami Heat was that they'd give the Boston Celtics a run for their money, and topple them as the best team in the Eastern Conference. But then the Celtics beat Miami three times, taking Suck to a whole other level. Expectations became so ... More >>
Blogs
March 8, 2011
LeBron James Sued Over Atlanta Nightclub Shenanigans
LeBron James left money on the table when he decided to sign with the Miami Heat, so maybe he's trying to make up the difference with a string of paid nightclub appearances you'd expect from a Jersey Shore cast member. According to court documents, James was scheduled to appear at Opera nightclub ... More >>
Blogs
March 1, 2011
Reports: Miami Heat to Sign Mike Bibby
Headband? Check! Not Mario Chalmers? Double check!According to several reports, the Miami Heat will sign former Kings, Hawks, and Wizards point guard Mike Bibby.The Heat had to waive a player today to make room on the roster for Bibby's services.But no worries, Heat fans. If you still pine for a ... More >>
Blogs
January 19, 2011
Miami Heat Fall to Atlanta in OT, Suffer Fourth-Straight Loss
And Karmapocalypse 2011 continues.While LeBron James was all healed up from his ankle injury and back on the court, it was Chris Bosh who was forced to sit out with a bum ankle. So we all got a glimpse into a Miami Heat team sans Bosh. And the result was a 93-89 loss at home to the Atlanta Hawks ... More >>
Blogs
January 17, 2011
Bosh, Wade and James All Sit Out Practice With Injuries
How exactly would the Miami Heat play without Dwyane Wade, Chris Bosh or LeBron James? Like the reigning champs of a retirement community's summer league? Like an especially hairy WNBA team? Like the '07-'08 Heat, who went Wade-less much of the season and finished with the worst record in the NBA ... More >>
Blogs
December 9, 2010
Heat Take Down Jazz, Extend Win-Streak to Six
The Miami Heat overcame a raucous Salt Lake City crowd and a few relentless Utah Jazz rallies and came away with the 111-98 victory against the vaunted Jazz last night. It was the team's sixth straight victory after their much ballyhooed loss to the Dallas Mavericks three weeks ago when LeBr ... More >>
Blogs
December 6, 2010
Heat-hating Journalists Now Dumping on 8-Year-Old LeBron Fan
How much does the media outside Miami absolutely hate the Miami Heat? So much that they're raining on the parade of an 8-year-old boy who got to meet the players as part of a special birthday present. In fact, they're completely ignoring facts to paint this kid as a front-running fan with "terrible ... More >>
Calendar
November 25, 2010
Enforcer Down
How much does the media outside Miami absolutely hate the Miami Heat? So much that they're raining on the parade of an 8-year-old boy who got to meet the players as part of a special birthday present. In fact, they're completely ignoring facts to paint this kid as a front-running fan with "terrible ... More >>
Blogs
May 27, 2010
Dwyane Wade Will Discuss Free Agency Plans With LeBron James, Joe Johnson
With one of the most talent-loaded free-agency classes in NBA history, the upcoming off-season is like war. Now, Dwyane Wade says he, the Cavs' LeBron James, and the Hawks' Joe Johnson will convene a sort of basketball Yalta Conference to discuss postseason reorganization."[Free agency] has been ... More >>
Blogs
April 12, 2010
Miami Heat Tied for Fifth Spot in the Playoffs
We laid out the scenario for how the Heat could move up in the playoff rankings, and everything seems to be going as planned. The team is now tied with Bucs for the fifth spot, after beating the Knicks 111-98. Nice way to rebound from Friday's home loss to the Pistons, which put a crimp in their ... More >>
Blogs
April 7, 2010
Jason Taylor Meets with The Jets, Even Though He Hates Their Fans
Jason Taylor, we're not sure if Sparano and Parcells share in it, but the city of Miami loves you. We understand Big Tuna and Lil Tony don't seem pumped on the idea of bringing you back for another season with the Dolphins, but why you got to play with our emotions by reportedly meeting with the Jet ... More >>
Calendar
March 4, 2010
Punch the Magic Dragon
Jason Taylor, we're not sure if Sparano and Parcells share in it, but the city of Miami loves you. We understand Big Tuna and Lil Tony don't seem pumped on the idea of bringing you back for another season with the Dolphins, but why you got to play with our emotions by reportedly meeting with the Jet ... More >>
Blogs
February 11, 2010
News Roundup: Police Environmental Fund Used to buy SUVs
Miami-Dade public schools are on the verge of another budget crisis, one that could ultimately affect arts education. [CBS4]A fatal accident has shut down much of North-bound I-95 this morning. [WSVN]A Miami-Dade police fund set up to fight environmental crimes has been used to buy SUVs, satellite T ... More >>
Blogs
February 11, 2010
Miami Heat vs. Atlanta Hawks: Kiss the Cook
Did we just wake up in Bizarro World? Because usually when the Heat visits Atlanta, the Hawks tend to go all Cirque du Soleil on their asses with their slam dunk aerial assaults, sparking the home crowd into a frenzy and causing Josh Smith to hop up and down and act like a prick. But last night, ... More >>
Blogs
January 5, 2010
News Roundup: Son Burns Mom to Death
A 24-year-old burned his mother to death in Northwest Dade. He took off in a stolen public works truck, a police chase ensued, and he was shot and later died. [JustNews]Michelle Spence-Jones is still preparing for re-election and plans to sue Charlie Crist while she's at it. [WSVN]Cops in the Keys c ... More >>
Calendar
December 31, 2009
Clip Those Wings
A 24-year-old burned his mother to death in Northwest Dade. He took off in a stolen public works truck, a police chase ensued, and he was shot and later died. [JustNews]Michelle Spence-Jones is still preparing for re-election and plans to sue Charlie Crist while she's at it. [WSVN]Cops in the Keys c ... More >>
News
October 15, 2009
Hoops hero Rumeal Robinson lost his Maserati, machine gun, and mom
A 24-year-old burned his mother to death in Northwest Dade. He took off in a stolen public works truck, a police chase ensued, and he was shot and later died. [JustNews]Michelle Spence-Jones is still preparing for re-election and plans to sue Charlie Crist while she's at it. [WSVN]Cops in the Keys c ... More >>
Blogs
October 9, 2009
How Hoops Hero Rumeal Robinson Lost His Guns, Cars, Stripper Girlfriend... and Even his Mama's House
Robinson blew $20,000 a night on strippers, his brother claims.With three seconds left in the game and his University of Michigan squad trailing Seton Hall by one point, 22-year old guard Rumeal Robinson lined up for two all-important free throws. The NCAA Division 1 basketball title hung in t ... More >>
Blogs
July 15, 2009
Bring Lamar Odom Back to Miami
WikicommonsReports this morning say L.A. Lakers owner Jerry Buss has withdrawn his offer to NBA forward Lamar Odom after Odom's agent didn't contact Buss with an answer. The offer was for four years/$36 million or three years/$30 million. Apparently, Odom is holding out for a five-year/$50 million d ... More >>
Blogs
April 27, 2009
Prunk TV with Melo (a.k.a. Carmelo Anthony)
Carmelo Anthony spoke with Prunk TV recently at a party in Miami. He was promoting his hip-hop label, Krossover Entertainment. Melo won a gold medal in Beijing last year, but who really cares, when the Miami Heat crushed the Atlanta Hawks like a bunch of grapes on Saturday. Dway ... More >>
News
April 23, 2009
Dirty Dwyane
A look at the three nastiest allegations surrounding the Heat superstar.
Blogs
January 16, 2009
Will the Heat's Turnaround Be as Miraculous as the Fins'?
There really is something in the water lately that makes our pro sports teams stop being such gawd-awful municipal embarrassments. Last year, the Heat had its worse season since its inaugural year, which didn't help to ease the pain we were experiencing after the Fins' 1-15 season. Things have turne ... More >>
Calendar
April 10, 2008
The Final Insult
There really is something in the water lately that makes our pro sports teams stop being such gawd-awful municipal embarrassments. Last year, the Heat had its worse season since its inaugural year, which didn't help to ease the pain we were experiencing after the Fins' 1-15 season. Things have turne ... More >>
Calendar
March 20, 2008
Who Needs a Coach Anyway?
There really is something in the water lately that makes our pro sports teams stop being such gawd-awful municipal embarrassments. Last year, the Heat had its worse season since its inaugural year, which didn't help to ease the pain we were experiencing after the Fins' 1-15 season. Things have turne ... More >>
Blogs
December 21, 2007
Weekly News Wrap - Crist, Fidel, Entertainment Scabs and more
There really is something in the water lately that makes our pro sports teams stop being such gawd-awful municipal embarrassments. Last year, the Heat had its worse season since its inaugural year, which didn't help to ease the pain we were experiencing after the Fins' 1-15 season. Things have turne ... More >>
Calendar
November 15, 2007
No Time to Cool Down
We need the Heat to blaze it up
Calendar
October 4, 2007
Penny for Your Backcourt?
We need the Heat to blaze it up
Calendar
March 22, 2007
Heat It Up
We need the Heat to blaze it up
Calendar
March 16, 2006
The Pluck of the Irish
We need the Heat to blaze it up
News
February 16, 1995
In the Paint
The Heat didn't hook up with Greg "Bald Eagle" Jackson so they could sit him on the bench.
News
March 20, 1991
The Ogg Man
The Heat didn't hook up with Greg "Bald Eagle" Jackson so they could sit him on the bench.

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