Al Qaeda

Zero Dark Thirty: A Thrilling Manhunt

Obama "Bayonets" Romney In Boca Raton, But America Is Real Victim After Miserable Debate

Last night's debate was what political experts call a "turd sandwich." Barack Obama and Mitt Romney provided 90 minutes of crap, and moderator Bob Schieffer happily mashed it all together between the blandest, stalest, white-bread questions he could find.Obama supporters will say their man won the d ... More >>

Osama's Translator, Locked Up in Gitmo, Says LeBron James Is a "Very Bad Man"

Most of the world has moved on from LeBron James' decision to leave Cleveland and play for the Miami Heat, but at least one man is still mad about it. The lawyer for Muhammad Rahim, an Al-Qaeda member who served as a translator for Osama bin Laden and who is currently being held in Guantanamo Bay, h ... More >>

Kim Kardashian, Kanye West Go Hairless, Allegedly Prep Unicorn Sex Tape Sequel

Kim Kardashian's pubic preference is no secret. If you've watched her home movies with ex-boyfriend Ray J, you're fully aware that the middle Kardashian sister likes to keep things virtually hairless. However, it wasn't until earlier today that Kim's preferred method of personal grooming was broug ... More >>

Miami imams accused of funding terrorists: Hate and redemption

Ten Songs Barack Obama Should Sing Next If He Wants a Second-Term

When Barack Obama busted into a few bars from Al Green's "Let's Stay Together" at an Apollo Theatre performance, he reminded the entirety of the United States of why we elected him back in 2008: He's a total rock star! If you're skeptical, just look at the numbers. MTV reports that sales of "Let's ... More >>

Security at Port of Miami Stepped Up for 9/11 Anniversary

​Officials stress there have been no specific threats made against the Port of Miami in relation to the tenth anniversary of the September 11 terrorist attacks, but local, state, and federal agencies will step up security at the port this weekend.

Describe and Illuminate

Bill Nelson Will View Osama Death Photos, Marco Rubio Opts Out

​Regular people will probably not see Osama bin Laden's final glamor shots, the one featuring a bullet hole somewhere in his face. At least not any time soon, but a select group of congressmen will get a chance to view those photos. Because Bill Nelson and Marco Rubio serve on the Senate Intellige ... More >>

Gitmo Detainees Led CIA to Bin Laden, So Is Cuba's Worst Prison Actually Working?

Gitmo vindicated?​When I visited Guantánamo Bay on the eve of President Barack Obama's inauguration, two things seemed certain: that the hated prison would soon be shuttered and that it would go down in history as one of America's worst follies.Two years later, the camp is still running strong an ... More >>

Celebrate Osama Bin Laden's Death Tonight With King of Diamonds' Big-Booty Strippers

​Unless you've been holed up in a $1 million dollar compound without phone, internet, or cable service, you've heard the news ... Osama bin Laden is dead. Yesterday, the mass-murdering founder of Al Qaeda, Most Wanted Man in the Universe, facial-hair aficionado, evil millionaire, and general ass ... More >>

Top 10 Lines From New Times 2010 Restaurant Reviews

Sugarcane draws babes, blokes, blades, and Belkys Nerey​Eater.com recently compiled New York Times critic Sam Sifton's 15 best "burns, barbs and zingers" from his 2010 reviews. It strikes me reading these that over the past twelve months, Mr. Sifton's reviews have been meaner than mine (this is me ... More >>

Al-Qaeda: Poison the Food, Don't Toss the Bombs!

via Flickr fooosco"We got your milk and cookies right here!"​Terrorists know how to hit us where it hurts.Al-Qaeda bombed the World Trade Center, two shiny, towering examples of American capitalism. WTC was chosen partially because it was in New York, America's capital, and second because it repre ... More >>

Miami's Own Adnan Shukrijumah Becomes Osama's Lieutenant

​I was wrong. Seven years ago, at the Iraq War's start, I wrote a column expressing skepticism about the Bush administration's claim that Adnan Shukrijumah of Miramar was a top terrorist. Earlier today, reports leaked from the FBI that Shukrijumah has become Osama Bin Laden's top man on globa ... More >>

Restrepo: A South Florida soldier and his comrades, vérité-style

Riptide goes to police academy at Kaplan College in Pembroke Pines and flunks out

Banana Republican Fails at Cop School

Maybe I'll have better luck blowing this guy away.​Banana Republican is watching a projection screen inside a chilly classroom with no desks.On the screen, a police officer in a tan uniform talks to a middle-aged man in farmer duds on the side of a rural road. It looks like a scene from the TV sho ... More >>

Flapjack Flip-Off X: Miami's best pancakes

Top 10 Worst Pop Songs Ever To Go Number One on the Charts

Americans are stupid. We like stuff that sucks, lots of us at once. That's called pop culture. Later we look back on it and laugh. That's called VH1. The crappy music we once enjoyed all together as a nation is documented in the archives of the pop music charts.Thanks to the power of the Intern ... More >>

Florida's Israeli Consul General Accuses Flotilla Activists of Plotting With Al-Qaeda

First it was Hamas. Now the Gaza-bound, blockade-defying flotilla was helping Al-Qaeda too. Ofer Bavly​So claims Israel's Consul General to Florida and Puerto Rico, Ofer Bavly. "The so-called peace activists on board the flotilla with ties to Al-Qaeda and other terror organizations were interested ... More >>

New Trial Sought in Liberty City "Terrorist" Saga

Just when you thought the saga of the "Liberty City Seven" was finally over, the five men who actually ended up with convictions are asking for either an acquittal or yet another retrial. The Seas of David group was originally arrested in June 2006 for suspicion that it was plotting with Al-Qaeda ... More >>

Gitmo Terrorists Are Coming to Your Back Yard! And to the Tiny Island Nation of Palau?

As we reported in February after a visit to Guantánamo Bay, President Obama faces some pretty damn thorny decisions as he tries to close the notorious prison camp in southeastern Cuba, none tougher than what the heck to do with all the prisoners. via Wikimedia Commons.Soon coming to a backyard near ... More >>

Turns Out U.S. Interrogators Went Waterboard Crazy in Gitmo

When we toured and wrote about Guantánamo Bay a couple of months ago, the military had already tossed out any pretense that waterboarding and other torture techniques had been used on inmates. But no one really knew how often the military and the CIA decided to violate the Geneva Conventions and hu ... More >>

Guantanamo's Final Days

America prepares to shutter the infamous prison camp, and jihad looms.

The Stain of Gitmo: "We Destroyed People's Lives."

Tomorrow on newsstands, we tell the story of Omar Khadr, who is the youngest detainee at Guantanamo, the only Westerner, and a symbol of sorts. To some, he is exhibit A for all that is wrong with America's War on Terror. For others, he's an example of why the camp exists in the first place. For us, ... More >>

Mehkago NT Announces Tour

Pure crusty hardcore aggression, 305-style, hits the eastern seaboard on the heels of a No Idea split with Religious as Fuck. Mehkago NT is an admixture of some of South Florida's best known, most notorious HC/punk/sludge/metal musicians.  The band features members or ex-members of DNME, To ... More >>

Buh Bye Bush, Thanks For... Um, Nevermind

For weeks now, I've been toying with the idea of posting all of the achievements of George W. Bush on his last full day in office. Of course this was going to be satirical in nature. Noting things like how we haven't had a terrorist attack on our soil since 2001, despite the fact experts like Bob Gr ... More >>

Cheney Still Hearts Gitmo; the Senate Does Not Heart Cheney

You've got to give Tricky Dick some credit. The man sticks to his guns (even when they're clearly shooting someone in the face).Amid the Bushie farewell tour over the past week, Cheney has time and again stuck up for his administration's use of, ahem, "questionable" tactics in treating prisoners at ... More >>

In Carlos, We Trust

The boss pays you. time to pay him back.

A Taste of Gitmo in Miami

American Heroes and Zeroes at Sundance '08

Morgan Spurlock makes us look bad, plus (separate!) films on baseball and steroids shine.

Weekly News Wrap - Chavez, Imus, Iran, the CIA and more

Liberty City Seven Trial Travesty

The case against Miami “terrorists” is mired in greed and falsehoods.

Liberty City Seven Trial Begins!

The Big Valley

Penniless Purgatory

Minerva Vasquez speaks for the first time about the terrorism charges against husband Narseal Batiste

Osama’s Thug

Jose Padilla is (a) a punk; (b) a terrorist in training; (c) an unwitting pawn for Uncle Sam and al-Qaeda; or (d) all of the above

Lights! Camera! Terrorists!

The federal indictment against the so-called Liberty City 7 was TV at its finest

Pearl of the Antilles

The elephant in Guantanamo's living room gets 4200 calories a day and a Koran

Terrorist or Trickster

Did a career criminal foil a potentially catastrophic attack on Miami? Or was I just duped?

War: What Is It Good For?

In Ridley Scott's latest epic, it's good for one really stunning siege

War on War Songs

Iraq and roll don't go together well when rockers protest

Goodbye to All That

A new wave of Latin cinema says so long to the Left

The Hard Lunch Bunch

Old Miami spooks discuss former times and pending threats

Letters from the Issue of December 26, 2002

The antiwar battle continues

Judging During Wartime

What happens if you're not good or evil, but somewhere in between?

Righteous Bombers?

Miami's non-Muslim mullahs are ready to forgive Castro's accused 2000 assassins

Critic's Notebook

What's happening, what's not, at the tip of the peninsula

A Tale of Two Mosques

Both are in South Florida and both attracted terrorists, but they could not be more different

The Wake-Up Call

Hamas is as close as Ecuador. And they're arguing about American targets.