Uber Exclusive South Beach Party at Vagabond Thursday, Bro

The Ed Hardy T-shirt. Nothing is a bigger symbol of douchebaggery in clubland than it. It's a faux-tattoo armor for those too wimpy to get real ones. Bedazzled and they achieve a whole another level of douchiness. Oh, and if you're wearing Affliction you have two strikes against you: you're...

By Jose D. Duran

October 27, 2009

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The Ed Hardy T-shirt. Nothing is a bigger symbol of douchebaggery in clubland than it. It's a faux-tattoo armor for those too wimpy to get real ones. Bedazzled and they achieve a whole another level of douchiness. Oh, and if you're wearing Affliction you have two strikes against you: you're poor and you're a douchebag.

In a what-took-us-so-long moment, Vagabond's Thursday night party (((Shake))) pays tribute to the eyesore with its "Uber Exclusive VIP Halloween" party. Partygoers are encouraged to don Ed Hardy gear in order to gain free entry this Thursday. Girls, you aren't being left out either. Make sure your ass tells everyone how "Juicy" it is by wearing your favorite Juicy Couture clothing.

But there's more: possibly fictional DJs Danner Von Martenberg (Berlin), Aaron T (back from Ibiza), and Diesto (Tiesto's brother) are all on the bill. Bottle service with pretty sparklers will be poppin' all night, God willing somebody drops five grand for a table.

We wonder how many South Beach patrons will accidentally make a detour to Vagabond and think they fit right in. Yep, douchebags.

By the way, for great moments in brotography or for costume ideas, check out TakeMyBroto.com. Sideways peace sign, y'all!

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Jose D. Duran is associate editor of Miami New Times where he primarily oversees the arts and culture and music beats. Jose joined the New Times staff in June 2008 but has been covering Miami culture since 2005. His work has also appeared in publications likeVice, Billboard, and Spin. He’s earned numerous accolades including placing first for Weekly Newspaper Contest: Business Reporting from the Florida Press Association in 2020; placing third for the Writing: Light Feature from the Florida Press Club in 2019; and placing third in Weekly Newspaper Contest: Best Obituary from the Florida Press Association in 2015. Jose holds a bachelor's degree in journalism from the University of Florida.

Contact: Jose D. Duran

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Twitter: @jose_d_duran