You will not believe what DJ Paris Hilton did last night.
She got exposed a new collabo track with Lil Wayne. And we here at Crossfade think she just might have "bust it wide open for a Trukfit sweater." Or at least for a 16-bar feature.
In her new unreleased single, which sounds a lot like an Afrojack song for some reason (he produced it), DJ Paris gets real clubby with the Young Money weirdo while he goes off about how much he wants to spend "one night in Paris."
Woah ... Check the cut for an extremely detailed breakdown.
See also:
-Lil Wayne Pays Miami Strippers $1000 to Fight: An Extremely Detailed Breakdown
-Justin Bieber's Sex Tape: An Extremely Detailed Breakdown
-Miley Cyrus's Dubstep Sex Tape: An Extremely Detailed Breakdown
-Paris Hilton's DJ Debut Sucked Balls: An Extremely Detailed Breakdown
So, there isn't really a vido proper, but you can watch this silly mash up reel of Paris doing things like partying and looking rich, while getting your first glimpse of this hopefully-not hit.
0:00 - 0:15
Pretty little intro. Just to let you know ... This is a song for a girl.
0:16 - 1:02
Producers try really hard to fix Paris Hilton's awful voice. But alas, it still sounds like having a rake shoved up our asshole while a squirrel tries to bury nuts in our ear canals. The lyrical content is a bunch of schoolgirl tripe about "OMG, we had such a good time last night, right? Can barely remember. #Drunk." Then there's a mega-build, which leads to...
1:03 - 1:16
Hey, Afrojack! Nice to hear from you there. Another glitchy Dutch house drop from the man, it sounds literally just like him.
1:17 - 1:46
Lil Wayne goes in on the track. He starts off with, "Last night was awesome, super fucking awesome." So it becomes immediately obvious that he's trying really hard. There are all sorts of innuendos about banging Ms. Hilton in here. And we are starting to think this duet is based on some kind of real-life encounter. "Excuse my French, but fuck the cameras, I want to spend a night in Paris," indeed.
1:47 - 2:32
And now ... Back to this terrible chorus and this grating insanity that's supposed to be Paris Hilton's singing voice. Meanwhile, Weezy can be heard in the background name-dropping his crew, as if people are going to listen to this song.
2:33 - 3:21
Boom boom! Another Afrojack drop. So far, Paris has only whined out about eight lines in this whole single. And that's all she'll have! Because the song is basically over. Except for a girly-ass pink and glittery outro.
What the fuck was the point of this crap? Besides discovering that Lil Wayne could get Paris's duck all wet? Or that Afrojack still knows how to make that one noise he makes all the time?
Whoa ... That was awful.
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