Stank Ball

The Miami Marlins’ bats have died. Both literally, in that they are made of wood that was once a living tree, and figuratively, in that the team can’t get a hit to save Ozzie Guillen’s life. Just when you thought the Fish had turned the corner with their offense in...

By Chris Joseph

June 28, 2012

[
        {
          "name": "Air - MediumRectangle - Inline Content - Mobile Display Size",
          "component": "19274298",
          "insertPoint": "2",
          "requiredCountToDisplay": "2"
        },{
          "name": "Editor Picks",
          "component": "17482312",
          "insertPoint": "4",
          "requiredCountToDisplay": "1"
        },{
          "name": "Inline Links",
          "component": "18711090",
          "insertPoint": "8th",
          "startingPoint": 8,
          "requiredCountToDisplay": "7",
          "maxInsertions": 25
        },{
          "name": "Air - MediumRectangle - Combo - Inline Content",
          "component": "17482310",
          "insertPoint": "8th",
          "startingPoint": 8,
          "requiredCountToDisplay": "7",
          "maxInsertions": 25
        },{
          "name": "Inline Links",
          "component": "18711090",
          "insertPoint": "8th",
          "startingPoint": 12,
          "requiredCountToDisplay": "11",
          "maxInsertions": 25
        },{
          "name": "Air - Leaderboard Tower - Combo - Inline Content",
          "component": "17482313",
          "insertPoint": "8th",
          "startingPoint": 12,
          "requiredCountToDisplay": "11",
          "maxInsertions": 25
        }
      ]

The Miami Marlins’ bats have died. Both literally, in that they are made of wood that was once a living tree, and figuratively, in that the team can’t get a hit to save Ozzie Guillen’s life. Just when you thought the Fish had turned the corner with their offense in May, they hit the proverbial wall face-first in June. And now the entire lineup is swinging the bat like they’re suffering from a full-body dry heave. Miami is currently ranked 14th in the National League in runs scored and batting. And when someone somehow gets on base, the team is hitting a putrid .217. That has translated into losses, which has translated into the Marlins going from being tied for first in the NL East to falling to fourth. Some blame hitting coach Eduardo Perez. Others say it’s a lack of patience from the hitters, who swing willy-nilly at anything that resembles a baseball. Whatever it is, the Marlins need to get their mojo back soon as the halfway mark approaches. You can say “It’s still early” only for so long. Maybe what this team needs is an afternoon game with the stadium roof open! Look for the Marlins to hit their way out of this slump Sunday against the division rival Philadelphia Phillies at Marlins Park (1390 NW Sixth St., Miami).
Sun., July 1, 1:10 p.m., 2012

Become A Member

BEFORE YOU GO...
Can you help us continue to share our stories? Since the beginning, Miami New Times has been defined as the free, independent voice of Miami — and we'd like to keep it that way. Our members allow us to continue offering readers access to our incisive coverage of local news, food, and culture with no paywalls.