Eleven Best Things to Do This Weekend

How did Memorial Day, a national holiday to honor fallen soldiers, become a three-day Spring Break full of parties, booze, and celebrity appearances? Keep it real this weekend as you venture through Miami's party scene; carry a little American flag in your pocket or at least a copy of Sebastian Junger's War.

These days, the holiday is more about the unofficial start of summer, which, Miamians, is just as somber an occasion, right? Remember August? Remember how everyone with money goes to "summer" elsewhere? We're left dangling down here like a sweaty pair of, er, nevermind. Enjoy the following weekend events:

Friday

• Shawn and Marlan Wayans hit a four-day engagement at the Miami Improv. Read our interview with the brothers here.

• A Streetcar Named Desire opens at the New Theatre. Nope, we can't stop ourselves, STEEELLLLLAAA! Look for our review this weekend.

• Stop by the Miami Science Museum for a little life aquatic with the Underwater Film Festival. Two reasons to go: 1.) It's from France! 2.) It features hometown favorites Coral Morphologic (please don't leave us for France). Get the schedule here.

• Holla! It's Day One of the Best of the Best concert on Saturday. Highlights from the lineup: Lloyd, Chris Brown, and Keri Hilson.

• Holla again! Miami's finally getting a roller derby league. Wanna throw some elbows with them? Attend this Saturday's Open House for Vice City Rollers. More info here.
  

• If the price of gas doesn't get you down, burn some petrol to get to Bill Mahr, who's performing at West Palm's Kravis Center.  (New Rule, Mahr: When scheduling a South Florida show, thou shall not pick the most northern venue.)

• Need a hip-hop chaser with your naked women? Then head to King of Diamonds for some Jeezy.

• Best of the Best Day Two, Stephen and Damian Marley serenade festival-goers at Bicentennial Park.

• Your real prom probably sucked, so take advantage of this do-over on wheels with Emerge Miami's Bike Prom.

• Since you're already dressed up and the Bike Prom ends at the Vagabond, step inside for their first ever '90s Homecoming. Get '90s fashion ideas here (bring back kinderwhore chic).
  

• Rickey Smiley, Don "D.C." Curry, George Wilborn, Rodney Perry, Donnell Rawling, Lady Roz G, and Shawty Shawty fill the James L. Knight Center for the Memorial Day Comedy Festival.