#ArtBaselProblems Is Now a Thing on Twitter | Cultist | Miami | Miami New Times | The Leading Independent News Source in Miami, Florida
Navigation

#ArtBaselProblems Is Now a Thing on Twitter

You know what's worse than finding out the Art Basel show you're at doesn't have an open bar?Nothing. Absolutely nothing is worse than that.This week Art Basel takes #FirstWorldProblems to a whole other level. Celebutantes and wannabe Miami hotshots have taken to complaining (ironically or not) on Twitter about how...
Share this:

You know what's worse than finding out the Art Basel show you're at doesn't have an open bar?

Nothing. Absolutely nothing is worse than that.

This week Art Basel takes #FirstWorldProblems to a whole other level. Celebutantes and wannabe Miami hotshots have taken to complaining (ironically or not) on Twitter about how miserable a weekend full of art is making their lives. So we decided to do a little top ten roundup of the most ridiculous -- and, okay, funny -- #ArtBaselProblems.

See also:
- Art Basel Miami Beach 2012 Fair and Gallery Guide

As though herpes weren't already enough of a problem in Miami. Thank you, Overheard Miami citizen, for doing your part.Wait -- A-Rod likes art?!It's called FOMO, or the Fear of Missing Out, and if you're fretting and pulling your hair out over which Art Basel show, event, or extravaganza to go to, then you're feeling it.

When Prada's your issue, I ain't got no tissues.It's a fact: All artists (and wannabes) live tortured lives. The proof is in the black clothing. Lest we forget that wannabe artists can be tortured too.Go to the drug store. Buy tanning lotion. Don't forget latex gloves, 'cause nothing ruins an Art Basel show like orange-stained hands.Because having a job is so passé.Define "need."What exactly is a "Champagne cleanse," and why would you do it? Have you been binging on Dom Perignon? Maybe Moet? Certainly Cristal.This one isn't a problem, so much as it is cure. Get over your Art Basel hangover with Will Smith's "Miami."

Follow Cultist on Facebook and Twitter @CultistMiami.

KEEP NEW TIMES FREE... Since we started New Times, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Miami, and we'd like to keep it that way. Your membership allows us to continue offering readers access to our incisive coverage of local news, food, and culture with no paywalls. You can support us by joining as a member for as little as $1.