Tropical Storm Fay: Rain-Soaking Little Punk or Coolest Storm Ever?
Wilma she ain't, but with Fay barreling toward the mainland and Floridians reacting with their usual mix of apathy and rage toward meteorologists, the storm has at least captured the attention of schoolkids everywhere in South Florida.
In fifth grade classrooms up and down the coast, Fay has been declared the COOLEST STORM EVER. That's some serious last-minute reprieve from the governor shit there.
For the rest of us, Fay's looking more like a rain-soaking little punk than a serious bitch, now that Miami-Dade has moved outside the National Weather Service's ominously named "cone of concern."
Even if Fay does strengthen into a full-on hurricane and make a sudden right-hand turn toward Miami, fear not: Dive bars from Club Deuce to the Abbey Brewing Company say they'll be open tonight and ready to help you drink until you don't feel feelings.
-- Tim Elfrink
Get the Weekly Newsletter
Our weekly feature stories, movie reviews, calendar picks and more - minus the newsprint and sent directly to your inbox.
- Trio Who Stole 150 Pigeons From Kendale Lakes Farm Sought By Police
Tue., May 26, 6:35 p.m.
Wed., May 27, 6:35 p.m.
Thu., May 28, 6:35 p.m.
Fri., May 29, 1 p.m.
- All Aboard Florida Trips Between Miami and Orlando Will Cost About $143
- Teen Girl Asks Cop If She Can Keep a Little Bit of the Pot He Found on Her