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South Beach drag empress Shelley Novak was forced to stop making dick joke, and start dealing with police when some guy allegedly slugged her and put a hole in her window. Maybe the fellow was a victim of one of Shelley's prick-size punch lines.
- That sort-of-creepy billboard of a naked guy you see off I-95 was defaced by graffiti bandits. Thankfully, despite the touchups, he remains naked.
- Cubans love growing pot because the most likely sentence is just probation. Yet another reason why American government trumps the Cuban government.
- Opa-locka is home to its share of fashion dictators -- flashing a bit of boxer shorts is illegal there, but an enterprising duo might have found a way around it.
- In fact, their design might be better than most of the crap that was sent down the runway at Fashion Week.
- Listicles can't agree on the quality of Miamians who have testicles.
- Also this week in useless surveys: Miami is the most relaxed town in America but has one of the worst airports in the world.
- This week in potentially usefully surveys: Marco Rubio is inching ever closer to Charlie Crist in the Senate polls.
- Hands down the quote of the week: "They're undefeated, they're probably smelling themselves, rubbing each other's balls, all that shit..."
- We'll begin with a dick joke, and we'll end with one: Here's a delightful post about fake Viagra.