The Craziest Features of Miami's Planned Skyscrapers
Miami's latest condo boom is not meant for those who simply need a roof over their head. No, most of these skyscrapers are aimed firmly at the world's 1 percent. Twenty-four-hour access to a basic fitness center and a decent pool just don't do it for these folks when it comes to amenities.
Developers are in a race to outdo themselves to produce extravagant gimmicks to set their projects apart. Some of them are kind of cool. Others are, well, a bit bizarre.
One Thousand Museum's Underwater View
Architect Zaha Hadid's plan for the crown of One Thousand Museum bravely answers the question: What if you could see the view from the top of a 700-foot skyscraper, but, like, while you were underwater?
Though the tower will already be eye-catching for its exoskeleton-like design, the rooftop pool might ultimately be the most talked-about feature. The entire pool deck takes up the top two floors of the 61-floor building, and the west-facing wall of the pool will be made of glass. Meaning, with goggles on, you'll be able to see across Miami-Dade County straight to the Everglades while you're underwater. Of course, the cheapest unit in the building starts at $5.5 million.
Paramount Miami Worldcenter's Rooftop Soccer Field
OK, this is kind of cool, but we patiently await the day when we can write the headline "Soccer Ball Flies off Worldcenter, Destroys Porsche Below." But this is nothing compared to the next Worldcenter feature.
Worldcenter's Rooftop "Yacht"
While the soccer field will be on a lower-level rooftop, this thing will apparently be on the very tiptop of the tower. Yes, it's a deck specifically designed to look like a cruise ship.
Biscayne Beach's Fake Beach and Paraiso's Beach-Less "Beach" Club
No one tell the tourists, but there are no real beaches in Miami. Yes, there are beaches across causeways in Miami Beach and Key Biscayne. Meanwhile, mainland Miami is separated by water by nothing more than a concrete seawall. That hasn't stopped developers from trying to pull some confusing marketing stunts.
First, there is Edgewater's planned Biscayne Beach, a building that's nowhere near a beach but gets its name because the developers plan to cover a portion of a pool deck in sand.
Also in beachless Edgwater is the Paraiso project's "Beach Club," which again is nowhere near a beach but, according to some renderings, will be littered with trucked-in sand. The four-tower project will also feature a beach-entry pool. Renderings aren't exactly clear on what that means, but typically it involves sand around the edge of a pool.
Porsche Design Tower's Robotic Garage
One would expect a condo building named for Porsche to be car-centric, and this under-construction Sunny Isles Beach tower doesn't disappoint. It will feature a unique robotic car garage in which elevators lift residents' cars to their own personal spaces near their units. The total cost for the garage alone: $560 million.
Oceana Bal Harbour's $14 Million Jeff Koons Sculptures
Jeff Koons is an artist beloved by rich people and loathed by art critics. Naturally, his work is being used to hawk condos at Oceana Bal Harbour. Developers bought two sculptures from the artist for $14 million, and each resident will receive a mini-stake in their ownership. "Some [buyers] appreciate art," Mark Zilbert, president of Zilbert International Realty, told the Wall Street Journal of the sculpture, "and those who are new to wealth, as long as they know it's expensive -- they love it."
Follow Miami New Times on Facebook.
Get the ICYMI: Today's Top Stories Newsletter Our daily newsletter delivers quick clicks to keep you in the know
Catch up on the day's news and stay informed with our daily digest of the most popular news, music, food and arts stories in Miami, delivered to your inbox Monday through Friday.