Tuesday, August 18, 2009 at 2 p.m.
Forget Ana, Bill, and Claudette. Miami has another storm projected to make landfall later this year: Amy Winehouse.
The last time full-time train wreck and erstwhile singer Amy Winehouse visited Miami, she married Blake Fielder-Civil (a professional Pete Doherty impersonator, according to our sources). Fielder-Civil -- excuse me, BLAAAAAKKEE -- spent time in jail, shot some unbecoming home videos of his wife that mysteriously leaked to the press, and eventually the two got divorced. So let's hope the outcome of her purported return visit goes a bit better.
The Sun reports
Winehouse plans to finish up her third album in Miami with producer Salaam Remi. He worked on the half of the album that Mark Ronson didn't, including "Tears Dry on Their Own."
The Sun also wonders if this means there'll be an Amy/Blake reunion, which they clearly do not want because Blake is "not the kind of character you want in Mothercare buying the rusks." I don't know what that means, but it sounds very menacing and very British.
Anyway, someone better notify the police departments of Miami-Dade and make sure our officers are up-to-date with the best way to handle beehived, recovering(?) druggie divas.