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Mugshot Fridays: Where There's Smoke...

Every Friday, Riptide brings you the most eye-catching mugshots taken the previous week (or thereabouts) in Miami-Dade County. Yes, there is some mockery of bad neck tattoos, but also adulation directed at perps who just plain look more badass than we ever will. This is the italicized intro to that series.

Mugshot Fridays: Where There's Smoke...

Arrested: 3/09

Charges: Aggrevated Assault with a Deadly Weapon and Resisting Arrest

We all knew the cigarette industry was inundating us with subliminal messages, but now they're putting them in our mugshots? That's just ...hold on I need a cigarette.

Mugshot Fridays: Where There's Smoke...

Arrested: 3/08

Charges: We're not even the type of people who get jealous of mustaches, and yet we're jealous of this mustache.

Mugshot Fridays: Where There's Smoke...

Arrested: 3/12

Charges: Battery on a Police Officer and Trespassing

"But I didn't mean to trespass and accidentally beat you officer. It's just with this haircut sometimes I don't see where I'm going."

 

Mugshot Fridays: Where There's Smoke...

Arrested: 3/08

Charges: Grand Theft and Petit Theft

You arrested her for grand theft, and yet you're going to leave the mystery of who snatched her weaved unsolved?

Mugshot Fridays: Where There's Smoke...

Arrested: 3/08

Charges: Disorderly Intoxication and Battery on a Police Officer

The snobs at Vogue might not agree, but we're pretty sure that "I might possible be a witch" is a good mature lady look.

Mugshot Fridays: Where There's Smoke...

Arrested: 3/08

Charges: Battery

This dude is either too old or too young for this shirt, but there's no doubt he should leave the surfer bro haircut to dudes in their 20s. Don't rub that "I may be grey, but I'm certainly not balding" ish in people's face.

Mugshot Fridays: Where There's Smoke...

Arrested: 3/13

Charges: Reckless Driving and Eluding an Officer

For a second there we thought this was Roberto Benigni.

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