Every year, Miami New Times names the 12 most awful people in our community -- one per month -- and then asks acclaimed artist Derf to caricature them so you can feel better about your jerk neighbors.
Click through to meet the scoundrels who shamed the Magic City this year. Consider it our Christmas present from Riptide. Enjoy!
Both a warning not to proclaim yourself a "party princess" in your Twitter bio and, more seriously, not to drink and drive, Karlie Tomica was an underage Nikki Beach bartender who got smashed on the job, struck and killed a local chef walking along Collins Avenue on her early-morning drive home, and then drove off. She's in jail on manslaughter charges.
Alex Rodriguez was suspended for a record 211 games by Major League Baseball after a New Times investigation uncovered his ties to Coral Gables steroid clinic Biogenesis. He is still fighting that decision. Phony doctor and Biogenesis founder Tony Bosch plied A-Rod, Ryan Braun, Melky Cabrera, Bartolo Colón, Nelson Cruz, and other professional athletes with performance-enhancing drugs.
Florida International University's Pi Kappa Alpha fraternity was suspended after New Times revealed the Pikes had bragged on their private Facebook page about dealing drugs, hazing pledges, and cheating on tests. The frat bros also posted several pictures of naked women, including their girlfriends.
Miami Beach cop Jorge Mercado was put on leave and remains under investigation after fatally Tasering teenage graffiti artist Israel "Reefa" Hernandez on August 6.
Derek Medina made perhaps the most disturbing Facebook update in history by uploading a picture of his dead wife, whom he had just shot in the head, and confessing to the murder.
Sweetwater Mayor Manny Maroño strove to be the center of attention by spearheading a spurious battle against bath salts. Instead, he ended up in the spotlight for accepting $30,000 in illegal kickbacks and running a tow company racket. Maroño pleaded guilty.
Rap heavyweight Fat Joe spent his Billboard heyday wondering what's love got to do with it. But he should have been worrying more about his tax bill. He spent three months in Miami's Federal Detention Center this year for failing to pay taxes on more than $3 million in income.
While Mayor Rob Ford was running amok in Toronto, Southwest Florida Republican Congressman Trey Radel was arrested in Washington, D.C., for cocaine possession. Of course, he groveled and promised to reform. What's more surprising is that he had previously supported drug testing for food stamp recipients.
When former NBA superstar Dennis Rodman wasn't spending his free time getting drunk in South Florida dive bars, he was busy becoming an odd propaganda piece in Kim Jong-un's communist North Korea.
If you like this story, consider signing up for our email newsletters.
SHOW ME HOW
You have successfully signed up for your selected newsletter(s) - please keep an eye on your mailbox, we're movin' in!
Anthony Verdugo is the leader of the Christian Family Coalition, Miami's deceptively named main anti-LGBT group. He spent most of 2013 successfully blocking an expansion of the county's human rights ordinance that would cover transgender people. His excuse: It would discriminate against those who like to discriminate against transgender people.
Another disgraced mayor, Homestead's infamously hard-partying Steve Bateman, was also caught making money on the side. He secretly snagged a $125-per-hour consulting job with a health-care company while using his office to support its project. Bateman now awaits trial.