It's only a matter of time until you see "LeBron James Escort-Gate" as the title of a upcoming topic on Around The Horn. LeBron James was running just a tad late to see his good buddy Jay-Z in concert this weekend at Sun Life Stadium, so he did what any rich person would do: He cut your poor asses in line -- because LEBRON JAMES, that's why, you baby.
Well, as you can imagine, not everyone is a Heat fan, or a basketball fan for that matter, and they would like to know exactly why it was necessary for Mr. James to be escorted on the wrong side of traffic by police to his hip-hopping rapper play, because WHAT IF THERE HAD BEEN A FIRE?! In the haters' defense, police are now reporting 4,376 calls for "Waaaambulances" have been made since the incident, so it seems LeBron got lucky at the time.
The incident would never have blown up except that LeBron himself posted a video of the wrong-way escort on Instagram:
After commenters on his post began lambasting him for using the cops to beat traffic, reporters began quizzing Miami-Dade Police about the free ride.
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MDPD just issued the following statement admitting they shouldn't have let the superstar beat the mess to the stadium:
Upon further investigation, it has been confirmed that the Miami-Dade Police Department did facilitate Mr. James from one intersection to another in the adjacent area of the stadium. This was not a scheduled escort, and although all safety precautions were taken, the department has identified these actions as a violation of departmental policies. The Miami-Dade Police Department will continue to look into the matter.
Then they all ripped off their police uniforms to reveal Miami Heat jerseys, and confetti fell from the sky while they all river-danced. Consider this case solved.