Magic City Kitty - Phone Banging
I'm in a relationship with a guy who works long hours and is often called to go out of town on short notice. I understand that this is part of the job and has been forever, but the problem is that he talks to one of his female co-workers on the phone all the time, and not always about work stuff. I have met her, in fact had her over for dinner, but I still don't like how often she calls him or the amount of time they spend on the phone. I trust my man but I don't trust her, what should I do?
Your question really should be "What can I do?" and the answer to that is, nothing. You've already had Fanny Fonecall over for dinner, which was a great plan assuming that the meatloaf and merlot was just a ruse to see if there were any sparks flying between her and your man. I'm also assuming that you're aware of the law that gives you carte blanche to whoop one's ass if they are threatening you in your home; but I do hope you consulted a lawyer before trying to pull that off, Izze. All in all, from your letter I can't see any real problem except a lack of trust and maybe the fact that you're lonely. Your man is always at work, en route to work, or talking to someone else about work and you seem to be at home twiddling your thumbs. I can't blame you for being a bit miffed about him phone-boning' some other girl, but he may label you the most ungrateful bitch ever if he knew that you didn't trust him on top of all the long hours he's clocking.
Don't think that I'm slamming your women's intuition Iz, because I'm not. You know your man much better than I do, and only you would be able to tell if something wasn't right. But what I do know is that not all men cheat, and if you're trying to make it work with this man, he deserves the benefit of the doubt. So instead of being so involved in what he's doing, take up scrap booking, watch a documentary, do something to keep yourself busy. You'll become so engrossed in your own life that you won't have time to worry about who he's texting at 4 in the morning. Of course keep your eyes open for any indecent behavior between him and this coworker, but otherwise relax, because an addiction to work is one of the more bearable, shit could be worse. And look at the bright side, at least he's not home all the time playing online sudoku and begging you to make him a cheese sandwich.
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