Maybe a café cubano con el jefe: Jeezzez Kriezz ... what are Chuck Strouse and Francisco Alvarado trying to do? Get us a Cuban chief of police? Can you guys at least wait until I move to Seattle? I have very strong objections to Strouse's column about Chief John Timoney, "Johnny Be Good" (March 2). First, what was the liquor? For example, was the color golden, amberish? In that case, it might have been apple juice. Or was it more wood-tone? That could easily make it an aged Islay malt whiskey. If it had a more orangie tone, it could have been a Woodford Reserve. And if pale yellow, it could have been Glenlivet or urine. So who can say?
Please tell the girls next time to order Maker's Mark Manhattans with a dash of cherry juice.
Just don't call me Victoria: Mariah Blake, the writer of the piece "A Beastly Background" (March 2), made a beastly mess of the facts. There was no "Victoria" model produced by Ford in 1933. The last Ford model designated Victoria was a 1931 Model A. The name Victoria was not resurrected as a model designation until 1951 and was given to a two-door pillarless coupe. The year 1933 was the height of the Depression, and Ford was lucky to sell its stripped-down economy models. It was the first year, however, the V-8 was made standard in all Ford automobiles. Bonnie and Clyde wrote the president of Ford Motor Company complimenting him on the speed of their 1934 Ford and its ability to get away quickly from bank robberies.
Miami needs New Times, if only as a counterweight to the Miami Herald. Unfortunately this kind of sloppy reporting does nothing to instill confidence in the reader as to the accuracy of your other articles.
Richard H. McCormick
Editor's note: The story misidentified two models in Street Beasts' automotive replica line. The firm produces a 1941 Willys and a 1934 Ford coupe. Street Beasts does make a 1933 Ford Vicky, not a Victoria as was stated in the story.
But stay away from Danny: I recently read The Bitch column "He Likes Big Butts" (February 23), and I'd like to quickly respond about some incorrect information that was printed. The article stated, "According to Bill Randolf, who attended Columbus College of Art and Design with both Fila and the painting's purported subject, painter and photographer Erin Wozniak, the face was lifted from Wozniak's photo Open Wide."
I know it won't make much of a difference now, but I just wanted to clear up the misunderstanding: I am not a photographer, and Open Wide is a painting, not a photo.
Via the Internet
She be good: Mariah Blake's "Jesus Redux" (February 9) was an excellent article, an eye opener. Great report. Can't say enough.
They be bad: Concerning Mariah Blake's article about the man claiming to be Jesus Christ, "Jesus Redux": I don't know much about what this church preaches, but I will say this: Did the people of Jesus of Nazareth's time believe he was the Messiah? Did they believe he was God? Or did they call him a blasphemous liar and kill him? Think about it.
Juan C. Castro
He be weird: Thank you for the highly entertaining article, "Jesus Redux," about the clash of more-Jesus, more-Hell, more-money aficionados. I believe the article in itself is as groundbreaking as the Catholic Church admitting the Earth is turning around the Sun. It's a great thing, saving Nietzschean philosophers, with their scary loud thoughts, from a by-humans-initiated, go-to-Hell, burning ritual in the local market square. In the year 2006, it must be a great thing saving so many naive souls from burning in a nonexistent Hell for a nonexisting god.
After all, your article made it clear that if Jesus is love, then love must be ignorance and money, the very root of intolerance and aggression. Suddenly an afternoon at the mall appears to be such a peaceful alternative ... until G'sus shows some consistency.
God be supergood: Inevitably Mariah Blake will be one of the most recognized persons on a world-wide level and definitely a candidate for the Pulitzer Prize. It is good to know that people with judgment like Blake's are not afraid of a religious system that has manipulated the minds of those innocent believers who for more than 200 years have been abused and insulted ... believers who have been lied to, from whom the truth has been concealed, a truth that inevitably and unquestionably can be revealed only by God Himself.
It is clear that the Word for us, the non-Jews, was the gospel of the Incircumcision, a gospel the "major religious institutes" have concealed to perpetuate the traditions established by Peter, a bad man who did not submit to the instructions of God.
What will the theologians say now about the second coming of God? The years 2000 and 2005 have already passed. Might it not be that He arrived like a thief in the night?
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Miami New Times has an opening for a music editor. This full-time position entails planning and editing the weekly music section, writing feature stories and a weekly column, and working with freelancers. Qualified candidates must have strong writing and organizational skills and be well versed in Latin, hip-hop, DJ/dance, and indie rock. Applicants should send a cover letter, resumé, and five clips to Jean Carey, managing editor, 2800 Biscayne Blvd., Miami, FL 33137. No e-mails please.