Quick, what would be the single most embarrassing way for superstar guard Kyrie Irving to utterly upstage his Cleveland Cavaliers partner-in-crime LeBron James?
If you said "abruptly quit the team, abandon LeBron, and flee to Miami to play for Pat Riley," congratulations! Because this seemingly insane scenario straight out of the seamiest fantasies of some Kendall fan who burned his Number 23 jersey two years ago... might actually be coming true?
Here's what we know in a truly crazy late-Friday breaking bit of sports madness: Multiple very well-sourced NBA types — including LeBron muse Brian Windhorst and all-around NBA sage Adrian Wojnarowski — are reporting that Irving has told the Cavs he wants a trade.
Why would Irving bail on Cleveland fresh off his latest Finals appearance? Well, Windhorst writes that Irving "no longer wants to play alongside LeBron James" and wants a team where he "can be more a focal point."
The story has some extra juice because the Cavs organization seems to be in total freefall at the moment. LeBron has already bitched publicly about the lack of free agents signed this offseason, and loathsome team owner Dan Gilbert fired his general manager and somehow has yet to fill the job again.
So assuming Irving actually does want to flee this mess and peace out on LBJ, where would he go?
That's where it gets interesting for Heat faithful. Take it away, ESPN NBA reporter Chris Haynes:
ESPN Sources: On Kyrie Irving front, Cavs were given four preferred landing spots: New York, Miami, San Antonio, Minnesota.— Chris Haynes (@ChrisBHaynes) July 21, 2017
The Heat don't seem to have the most natural options to trade for a legit superstar like Irving, but that hasn't stopped Miami fans from rushing to their NBA Trade Machines faster than Pat Riley could pull up "Gilbert" from his phone's contacts list:
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This could all be some bargaining move by Irving or his agents, but — at the moment — it feels like every bridge between Irving's home and downtown Cleveland is heartily aflame and about to crumble.
Whether the road out of Ohio could actually lead to South Beach remains to be seen, but the LeBron haters of Dade County couldn't dream up a more fitting revenge on the King.