Hugo Chavez Stalking Simon Bolivar: Creates 3D Image, Gives Dead Leader Facebook Page
Chavez unveils his new 3D portrait of Simon Bolivar
via You Tube
We'd like to think that somewhere up in heaven, South American liberator Simon Bolivar is looking down at Hugo Chavez and thinking, "I really need to get a restraining order against this guy."
Chavez has spent the last week taking his Bolivar-stalking to new levels of creepiness. First, he unveiled a "lifelike" 3D portrait of Bolivar (created from forensics taken when Chavez ordered the national hero's body exhumed on live TV last year). Then, he gave Bolivar his own posthumous Facebook account.
Chavez has long used Bolivar as his icon of Venezuelan nationalism (even renaming the country a "Bolivarian Republic" after taking office, presumably while staring jealously at Bolivia for already taking the coolest name.)
His obsession reached a new level last week with the unveiling of the new portraits, which Chavez claims are the most accurate representation yet of what Bolivar actually looked like back in the day.
The most startling revelation, observers say, is how well the leader pulled off Hugh Jackman-as-Wolverine sideburns:
NPC Southern States Bikini, Figure, Men's Physique
TicketsFri., Jul. 7, 6:00pm
NPC Southern States Bodybuilding Championships vs. NPC Southern States Fitness & Figure Championships
TicketsSat., Jul. 8, 6:00pm
Florida Launch vs. Chesapeake Bayhawks
TicketsSat., Jul. 15, 7:00pm
Florida Launch vs. Charlotte Hounds
TicketsSat., Jul. 22, 7:00pm
Chavez followed that stunt by giving the leader, who died in 1830, his own Facebook account, the New York Times reports.
The page is light on posts so far -- apparently Bolivar's greatest wish is simply that you download some sweet computer wallpaper of his face -- and only has about 1700 followers so far.
But as Chavez works toward winning another term in office in November, a campaign he currently leads by up to 15 points over challenger Henrique Capriles, you can bet Simon Bolivar will show up again to help. Whether the dead icon wants to or not.
Get the ICYMI: Today's Top Stories Newsletter Our daily newsletter delivers quick clicks to keep you in the know
Catch up on the day's news and stay informed with our daily digest of the most popular news, music, food and arts stories in Miami, delivered to your inbox Monday through Friday.