You're high on meth, cruising around Fort Lauderdale with dilated pupils, a rocketing body temperature, and a pipe on your lap, when cops suddenly pull you over. What do you do?
Well, if you're Carlos Lopez, then the purchasing director for the City of Hialeah, you stuff that meth pipe right into your rectum and hope for the best. That's exactly what Fort Lauderdale police say happened back in December.
The trouble began for the 45-year-old Lopez, El Nuevo Herald reports, December 26 when an officer noticed a 2008 Hyundai driving slowly on a street until a group of men surrounded it.
It didn't take great detective work to suspect something was up when, at the sight of the police officer, the men all sprinted away and the car's driver sped off at twice the speed limit.
The cop eventually caught up, though, and found Lopez inside. He called a canine unit, he writes in an arrest report, when Lopez had "slurred repetitive speech," and the dog helped find a container of meth in the car.
But the cops also noticed that Lopez's pants were undone and he looked visibly uncomfortable. He finally admitted the truth, the cops say.
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"López admitted to have a methamphetamine glass pipe inside his anal cavity," the cops wrote, according to El Nuevo. "López then stated he placed it in his rectum as he was being pulled over so I wouldn't find it if I searched his vehicle."
Lopez, who was promoted to director of Hialeah's purchasing department in 2011, has been transferred to the public works department. He's due in court next month on drug charges.