On Sunday, The New York Times Magazine published a Q&A and photo spread with Dwyane Wade entitled, "Dwyane Wade Loves His Jordans and His Body Lotion".
That title tells you everything you need to know about this story, in which Wade speaks on his love for baby wipes, "the powders for my feet", traveling with two personal masseuses, and the "look book" that his stylist prepares for him before the playoffs -- which on Tuesday apparently included Mr. Potato Head eyeglasses without lenses.
We couldn't really figure out how to make fun of Wade's portrayal in this article in a way that the article hadn't already done for us. We were intrigued by the third photo in this spread, however, which showed a tiny group of books on a shelf, with the caption: "Wade collects books."
Times photographer Rudy Archuleta kindly sent us a blown-up version of the photo so we could see the titles of the books. This is what's in the D. Wade Memorial Book Collection:
Son of Promise, Child of Hope (Barack Obama's children's book)
One Hundred Years of Menswear (You didn't think we were gonna say Solitude, did you?)
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So there you have it -- the literature that Wade can bury himself in this offseason, which hopefully doesn't start tonight. LeBron James, if you're wondering, is still on Hunger Games.