Dr. Michael Salzhauer is a damn good plastic surgeon. He's pretty damn controversial, too, thanks to his many publicity stunts. Earlier this year, he attained Internet infamy with a music video entitled "Jewcan Sam (A Nose Job Love Song)." Critics called him anti-Semitic.
Now he's at it again with a spoof of the hit song "Boyfriend" by Justin Bieber. "Hey girl, let me suction you," raps Dr. Schnoz. "I don't need triple whoppers but I see that you do." But the lyrics aren't the only think edgy about the video. To promote it, Salzhauer is offering free Botox to anyone who posts the parody on his or her Facebook page or Twitter account, so long as at least five people "like" the link.
Read more about Salzhauer's risky pursuit of viral video fame in this week's feature, "Boob Tube." Or click through to see Dr. Schnoz's video as well as our behind-the-scenes footage of Miami's wackiest, most controversial surgeon.
New Times hung out with Salzhauer for months while writing the feature. We sat in on several operations, including one in which Dr. Schnoz was offering a woman free chin implant surgery so that Inside Edition could film the whole thing.
Here's an excerpt. But be forewarned: it ain't for the faint of heart:
Salzhauer slices a one-inch cut into the bottom of her chin. There isn't much blood. An assistant removes a clear silicone disc from its sterile packaging, dunks it in iodine, and hands it to Salzhauer. The doctor deftly slips the implant under the muscles like a chef stuffing a Cornish game hen. He hums classical music to himself as he eyes his work from several angles. Satisfied, he sutures the implant into place and closes up the wound with catgut. "Oh yeah, she looks a lot better," a male anesthesiologist says enthusiastically.
Next, Salzhauer moves on to his specialty. "We call this 'unzipping the nose,' " he says, snipping the tissue between the nostrils and peeling back the nose like a satin evening glove. A bloody stump of cartilage glows strawberry red beneath the lights.
Salzhauer is a skilled surgeon, but he's skating on thin ice with his scandalous publicity stunts. Case in point, his latest music video, entitled "If I Was Your Surgeon." He posted it online a little over a week ago with the offer of free Botox to anyone who helped it go viral.
"I've already had a couple of patients tell me: 'Momma needs a new pair of shoes and some Botox. I'm going to share the hell out of it,' " Salzhauer says.
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SHOW ME HOW
We hung out with Salzhauer while he was shooting the spoof at the Dezer Car Museum. Here is our exclusive behind-the-scenes footage, including Dr. Schnoz explaining what really happens when we get old and fugly and how he would fix Hillary Clinton's neck waddle.
For more on Dr. Schnoz, check out this week's cover story. But sorry, no free Botox for those who share the story on Facebook or Twitter.