A real-life episode of Burn Notice essentially played out this weekend at a Miami Beach hotel, complete with a mysterious shooting death, a hastily evacuated foreign head of state, a deathly bad odor, and a hazmat team.
It's not clear whether Bruce Campbell was involved -- but frankly, we're not ready to rule it out considering how little information has emerged to clear up what in hell was going on at the Miami Beach Resort & Spa.
The trouble began around 10 p.m. Saturday, according to the Miami Herald, when a T-shirt-clad man drenched in blood called police to report his friend had just been shot on the 11th floor.
When the cops got off the elevator, they were hit with an odor so horrific they fled back to the lobby and called a hazmat team.
Just to make things more interesting, the prime minister of Belize was at that very moment delivering a keynote speech to a packed room of dinner guests -- right next door to a rowdy wedding reception in the adjacent banquet room. Oy!
The Secret Service hastily evacuated Prime Minister Dean Barrow while the hazmat teams moved in. This led a few news sources in Belize -- which were understandably confused by the baffling turn of events -- to briefly post items online that Barrow had been shot.
Meanwhile, the rest of the hotel's 1,000 other guests were also led outside, including poor bride Felicia Rameriz, who was hustled out of her reception during her second dance and left to cry on the curb in her wedding dress, according to the Herald.
If you like this story, consider signing up for our email newsletters.
SHOW ME HOW
You have successfully signed up for your selected newsletter(s) - please keep an eye on your mailbox, we're movin' in!
The hazmat guys eventually decided there was nothing harmful in the air, and the police brought all the guests back inside for interviews about the shooting.
Which leaves us all with only a few lingering questions.
Who was the shooting victim? Was it murder, suicide, or an accident? What the F smelled so bad that seasoned homicide detectives went scurrying for the door, calling hazmat teams, and evacuating the prime minister of Belize?
Other than that, everything makes perfect sense. We'll update the post when we learn any new details.