"Dance music has officially taken over America! This is it, dance fans! The moment you've all been waiting for!"
But then ... We here at Crossfade (like all y'all epically dedicated beat freaks) were forced to sit through a mesmerizingly glossy quarter-hour Ultra commercial.
You know, before finally finding out the fucking news.
Eventually, though, after priming us with promises of "global EDM history" (not to mention Final Kid's beautifully excruciating 14:27 recap vid of last year's undeniably epic fest), Ultra revealed its surprise ...
"Ultra Music Festival will be the first electronic music festival to take place over two big weekends!"
Twice the epicness! Twice the uhntz-uhntz!
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Ultra Music Festival 2013. Friday, March 16, to Sunday, March 17, and Friday, March 22, to Sunday, March 24. Bayfront Park, 301 Biscayne Blvd., Miami. Tickets go on sale October 17. Visit ultramusicfestival.com.