Who's straight fiending for some beats?
Well, with just 31 hours, 29 minutes, and 55 seconds till it's time for you and 150,000 other furry-booted beat freaks to crash the gates at Ultra Music Festival, you will soon be overdosing on the uhntz-uhntz.
In the meantime, though, there's no reason to stay at home, napping, chilling, and fanatically hydrating for this weekend's three-day rave on the Bay.
Circo Loco. With Seth Troxler, Matthias Tanzmann, David Squillace, Ellen Allien, Clive Henry, and others. 11 a.m., Surfcomber Hotel, 1717 Collins Ave., Miami Beach; 305-532-7715; surfcomber.com. Ages 21 and up. Yes, Circo Loco's official mascot is a crazy, afro-rocking, tongue-wagging, googly-eyed clown. But believe us, facepaint at a pool party is straight stupid. After only a half-hour of swimming, sweating, and uhntz-uhntz-ing, the makeup will melt, bleed into your eyes, and you'll end up functionally blind. So just stick to a swimsuit, snorkel, and glowsticks.
Skrillex's OWLSA Miami. With Zedd, Kill the Noise, Dillon Francis, Koan, Alvin Risk, and others. Thursday, March 22, noon, Raleigh Hotel, 1775 Collins Ave., Miami Beach; 305-534-6300; raleighhotel.com. For VIP passes, email email@example.com or firstname.lastname@example.org. Ages 21 and up. Slip into some Skrillex-approved poolside attire (skinny jeans, dirty t-shirt, black nailpolish) and dubstep down to the Raleigh's pool for a party with the ex-screamo kid and his OWLSA label crew.
Sharam. With Nicole Moudaber, Layo & Bushwacka, Ahmet Sendil, and others. 10 p.m., SET Nightclub, 320 Lincoln Rd., Miami Beach; 305-531-2800; setmiami.com. Tickets are sold out. Ages 21 and up. Straight outta Iran, Deep Dish cofounder, Yoshitoshi Recordings mastermind, and 42-year-old disc jockey Sharam's gonna be dropping dance-floor bombs on South Beach.
Sebastian Ingrosso and Alesso's Calling Miami. With Otto Knows. 11 p.m., Wall Lounge at W South Beach, 2201 Collins Ave., Miami Beach; 305-938-3131; wallmiami.com. Eight-person table reservation costs $7500 plus fees via wantickets.com. Ages 21 and up. If you're feeling extra Swedish after leaving the Masquerade Motel, go blow $8000 on another six hours of poppin' bottles and coppin' beats with Mafia man Sebastian Ingrosso and fellow meatball-eater Alesso.
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Tiësto. With Cedric Gervais. 11 p.m., LIV, 4441 Collins Ave., Miami Beach; 305-674-4680; livnightclub.com. Tickets cost $425 plus fees via wantickets.com. Ages 21 and up. It probably won't be as epic as shooting corks at the pilot of the Tiësto jet with Swedish House Mafia. Still, though, according to Crossfades' very own poll, this Dutch DJ is the Led Zepplin of EDM. So we can always hope, hope, hope for groupies humping sharks at 169 BPMs.