The art of sensual seduction via song ain't nothin' like it used to be.
Back in the day, all it took was a few lines from Al Green's "Let's Stay Together" to not only get the panties droppin', but also have them flying through the air like graduation caps.
Contemporary R&B is a strange beast, though. A really strange beast. One that films epic music videos with absurd narratives, features sex-obsessed protagonists, and employs every possible euphemism or witty synonym for fucking. Maybe that last part was always a part of the genre.
R. Kelly should be credited with introducing meta-hilarity to ballads about bumpin'. And The-Dream refined the ridiculousness like Plato editing his notes from Socrates. But the new face of postmodern panty droppin'?
Well, it belongs to Toronto's most sensual space centaur, The Weeknd.
Last year, Abel Tesfaye became the latest artist to hit it big with a free online mixtape. His House of Balloons was a no-holds-barred, literary opus about doing drugs and getting down.
Eventually, even Drake started to pay attention. And when Drizzy is paying attention, you may or may not be doing something right, but you're bound to be making assloads of dough.
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Straight up, though, The Weeknd is definitely doing something right. If you need proof, check out the erotic space opera music video for "The Knowing." Or check out Tesfaye when he performs at Revolution Live.
Just be sure to bring an umbrella, because all forecasts point to a heavy downpour of panties.
The Weeknd. Tuesday, May 1. Revolution Live, 100 SW Third Ave., Fort Lauderdale. The show starts at 8 p.m. and tickets cost $32 plus fees via ticketmaster.com. Call 954-449-1025 or visit jointherevolution.net.