Dear Taylor: A dumpster is not a mailbox.
Dear Taylor: A dumpster is not a mailbox.

Taylor Swift at American Airlines Arena April 10

Of the many things Taylor Swift is known for, her extremely dedicated fan base has to be the most notorious. (It's totally not, and you know what is, but let's just go with it.) Unfortunately for them, it was recently revealed that instead of their fan mail reaching her beautiful blue irises, it might have ended up heaped inside a nasty Nashville dumpster. But we did some dumpster-diving and saved the letters.

XOXO forever: Hello! You may be wondering about the beautiful precious gems I have used to decorate this letter to you! They were my mother's. Don't worry — she's not dead. Haha! But your songs inspired me not to take any nonsense from anyone, so I took my parents to court and got divorced from them and I got to keep a lot of her stuff. Cool, right? So these jewels are just as much mine as they are yours, because you are my inspiration and gave me the strength to be a legal adult at 14! So dope. Mary Mayhem

Fellow feminist 4 life: The one and only Tay! (May I call you that? Hehehe.) Hey, girl! Hey! My name is Julie and I have been a fan since day one. (But who hasn't been? LOL.) I am writing to you now, however, because your resilience, music, and beauty have recently inspired me to become a feminist! Yay! Me and some other T. Swift fans made an official feminist club on our school campus, and you are our idol, of course. Please visit us. It would mean the world to us all. Our first male sacrificial ceremony is tonight! It will be so much fun. Love ya, girl! Julie from Oberlin, OH


Taylor Swift: The Red Tour

Taylor Swift: The Red Tour: 7 p.m. Wednesday, April 10, at American Airlines Arena, 601 Biscayne Blvd., Miami; 786-777-1000; Tickets cost $45 to $105 plus fees via All ages.

Love from Nebraska: Taylor Alison Swift! Where can I even begin?! I am such a huge fan. As a single momma, I am just so touched by your music and soul. And when I'm allowed to see my children on every other weekend, I only let them listen to your music!!! I wrote your name in buttons on this letter because I sew. (I'm a sewstress!) They are red for your album and white because that's what we are, and that is good!!! Kathy

Meetin' in Eden: My dearest Taylor, I am so sorry all those bad men made you cry on your guitar and fall down in the desert. I wish we could meet because I would love you right! We could run away together and make our own paradise. Maybe like the one I made right here on the paper! Giraffes! Cherry trees! Hippos! Flowers! Snails! Gold! And silver for our wedding rings! OK, let me know. Love you, baby girl. Jason

Climbing the love tree: Hi, Taylor! My name's Becky. And this is a love tree full of owls sitting close because they're in love. You are the very pretty owl at the end of the branch all alone because boys don't treat you right! And I am the owl pointing at you because you are so beautiful and talented! But don't you worry, because one day we will both find the love! That's why we are sitting on the love tree, silly! Becky

"We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together ": Yo, we figured if we covered this note in enough dumb shit and glitter, you'd read it. Please stop writing to us and about us. Thanks. Harry Styles, Conor Kennedy, Cory Monteith, Jake Gyllenhaal, Taylor Lautner, John Mayer, Zac Efron, Joe Jonas, Chord Overstreet, Toby Hemingway, Lucas Till, Eddie Redmayne, and Garret Hedlund


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