Hey Roxanne, wanna spend a few hours with Sting, getting stripped down and raw?
And no, unfortunately, we're not talking about running a bath, lighting a circle of fertility candles, and prepping for a private exhibition of the former Police frontman's mastery of tantric pleasure principles.
We're referring to nothing more exotic (or explicit) than a perfectly family-friendly concert in a very public place. And specifically, Sting's newly announced Back to Bass tour, which includes a Miami show at the Fillmore Miami Beach on November 12.
Sting's Back to Bass Tour 2011 Schedule
*Additional dates will be announced
October 21 The Wang Theatre, Boston
October 26 Tower Theater, Philadelphia
October 29 Constitution Hall, Washington, DC
November 1 Massey Hall, Toronto
November 5 Rosemont Theatre, Chicago
November 6 Fox Theatre, Detroit
November 12 Fillmore Miami Beach, Miami
November 16 Verizon Theatre, Dallas
November 17 Verizon Wireless Theater, Houston
November 20 Wells Fargo Theatre, Denver
November 22 Comerica Theatre, Phoenix
November 28 The Wiltern, Los Angeles
December 2 Nob Hill Masonic Center, San Francisco
December 5 The Paramount Theatre, Seattle
December 8 Queen Elizabeth Theatre, Vancouver
According to press release blurbage, Sting will be backed by "a five-piece band in an intimate theatre setting ... performing songs spanning his dynamic and enduring solo career, from his 1985 debut The Dream Of The Blue Turtles to his latest release, Live in Berlin, plus a selection of The Police's greatest hits."
Plus, a three-disc box set, Sting: 25 Years, and a live DVD, Rough, Raw & Unreleased, will be released on September 27 "to commemorate the 25th anniversary of Sting's solo career."
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So, aside from stripping down, getting raw, and dropping lame puns, the Back to Bass tour promises to be a celebration of Sting's quarter-century spent pushing the boundaries of elevator, er, rock music.
Hmm ... Sounds like maybe it is time to turn on that red light, Roxanne.
Sting's Back to Bass tour. Saturday, November 12. Fillmore Miami Beach, 1700 Washington Ave., Miami Beach. The concert begins at 8 p.m. and tickets go on sale for at 10 a.m. on Friday, September 19, via livenation.com. Call 305-673-7300 or visit fillmoremb.com.