Steven Tyler Quits American Idol: "It's Time for Me to Let Go of My Mistress, American Idol"

See also "A Timeline of Steven Tyler's Transition From Sex Symbol to 63-Year-Old Grandma" and "Charlie Sheen May Join American Idol as Judge: Cigarettes, Sloppy Kisses, Other Predictions." Whoa ... Is it possible that Charlie Sheen might actually get hired as an American Idol judge? Well, we here at Crossfade...

By S. Pajot

July 12, 2012

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Whoa ... Is it possible that Charlie Sheen might actually get hired as an American Idol judge?

Well, we here at Crossfade would certainly love to see Crazy Chuck chain-smoking his way through prime time while rambling incoherently at Ryan Seacrest and even occasionally engaging in non-consensual tongue-kissing with shocked contestants.

Yesterday, "winner-winner, Sheen dinner" on Idol seemed like a joke. But right now, it's looking good.

Earlier today, Jennifer Lopez said, "It's time for me to go." And now another judge, Steven Tyler, has "decided decided it's time for me to let go of my mistress 'American Idol' before she boils my rabbit."

Uh, whatever that means.

In a statement released just a few minutes ago, Tyler explains:

I strayed from my first love, AEROSMITH, and I'm back--but instead of begging on my hands and knees, I got two fists in the air and I'm kicking the door open with my band. The next few years are going to be dedicated to kicking some serious ass--the ultimate in auditory takeover... On Nov 6, we are unleashing our new album, Music from Another Dimension on the Earth, Moon, Mars, and way beyond the stars...'Idol' was over the top fun, and I loved every minute of it...Now it's time to bring Rock Back. ERMAHGERD.

Well, have fun rockin', Stevie. But we can already smell the Tiger Blood, baby.

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