Six Shitty Music-Inspired Video Games, From Miley Cyrus to Motley Crue and 'N Sync
A team effort with video game and culture mag Kill Screen, Soundplay is a series of beautiful and enigmatic online games based on the music of M83, Cut Copy, Matthew Dear, and others. They've done a wonderful job of matching the music with the images on screen, as well worked lyrics into the actual plot of gameplay.
Kudos to Pitchfork and Kill Screen for getting music games right. But this is the first real win in a long line of awful pop music gaming mishaps.
Check out these six shittiest of video game fails.
6. Hannah Montana DS
Is your child totally obsessed with the inane antics of part-time pop star, part-time teenager Miley Cyrus? Well, now your child can play at being Hannah Montana, even while pooping! This game would be way cooler if it included salvia trips and penis cake.
5. Lady Gaga Tap Tap Revenge
Since dumb people with smart phones like tapping screens ad nauseum (and because Lady Gaga's little monsters will pay anything to support their mother's designer shoe habit), this video game exists. For just $4.99, you too can take 12 of Gaga's greatest hits, smash your thumbs, and pretend you're not a commercial whore conned by idol worship.
4. Michael Jackson Moonwalker and Wii Experience
Jackson is such a music mogul, he gets not one but two shitty video games! The first offender, Moonwalker for arcade and later Sega home edition, starred the "Bad" man adventuring and fighting random hoodlums in the streets, beating them to death with his magic dance moves. The second, posthumous release turns the 3D Imax Experience into a take-home video game much like all other Wii dance games, except this one brings the magic of the late King of Pop into your home, forever.
3. Britney's Dance Beat
Back when DDR was console king, PS2 released a button-mash version with all the star's slutty hits as a soundtrack. Your little girl can play along as an auditioning back-up dancer for Britney, while singing lyrics like, "I may be young/But I've got feelings too/And I need to do what I feel like doing." Head-shaving not included.
2. Mötley Crüe: Crüe Ball
As if hair metal wasn't offensive enough, the '80s wildest crew took it up a notch with a totally exciting version of pinball. It's all your favorite Mötley Crüe hits in 8bit form, with none of the alcohol or tits. No hip-checking allowed.
1. 'N Sync: Get to the Show
The absolute, hands-down worst musical video game goes to this confusing snoozer for Gameboy Color. You play the ultimate boy-band's number-one fan, and you've got to drive their tour bus to an epic concert. But first you have to stop to buy them flowers and keep people in the hotel quiet for them. This game was as horrible as 'N Sync sounded. What's even going on here? We want a money-order refund from the '90s.
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