Six Reasons Wynwood Is Better Than South Beach

F@^k the Beach! Melissa Connery would rather party in Wynwood.
F@^k the Beach! Melissa Connery would rather party in Wynwood.
Photo by Laurie Charles

Justin Timberlake's "Suit & Tie" was blasting from the outside speakers of Shots Miami as ladies in black shorts, sandals, and colorful skirts wearing straw wajiro bonnets and afros, and guys in denim jeans, t-shirts, and sneakers rockin' Mexican sombreros and Santa Claus hats crowded the bar for F@^k the Beach Friday.

There's no denying that South Beach's lavish charm and celebrity-studded bashes is what attracts world-class acts and globe-trotting beat freaks ... But sometimes you wanna have an equally fun, booze-filled night without having to deal with dreadful parking, block-long lines, and prissy people.

And those partying it up in Wynwood all agreed on one thing ... Here are six reasons why Wynwood is better than SoBe, according to the party animals at Shots Miami.

See also:

-Five Ways to Get Drunk at Art Walk

Friendlier crowd = better vibes
Friendlier crowd = better vibes

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No Drama and A Friendlier Crowd

"There is no cover and no lines," said Melissa Connery, who was sitting outside with her posse.

"The people are friendlier, the drinks are cheaper, and the bartenders are nicer and actually talk to you," she went on. "And the music is better," she added as a mix of old-school hip-hop and dance songs, including Notorious B.I.G.'s "Big Poppa," played in the background.

It's all about 'em shots for "Eze Nnadi" and Stacie.
It's all about 'em shots for "Eze Nnadi" and Stacie.

Blow Jobs and Viagra More Intimate Encounters

"Do we have to prefer Wynwood over the beach?" asked Eze Nnadi (or so he said he was) who was sitting with his lady friend Stacie.

As he was about to go on a SoBe rant, a waitress wearing fishnet stalkings and booty shorts brought out the Blow Job and Viagra combo for the Couple's Shot that the two had ordered.

As the waitress explained to Nnadi and Stacie how the thing worked (Stacie would have to place the Blow Job between Nnadi's legs and shoot it up using nothing but her mouth, and Nnadi would have to say "I need a hard on" before swallowing the Viagra shot), the two gave each other a confused look, and then just went with it.

"You won't get that at the beach."

"I guess that's why Wynwood's better," fessed Nnadi.

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