Have y'all filed your taxes yet?
That Tuesday, April 17 deadline is right around the corner, folks. And unless you're pulling a Mitt Romney and keeping your change in foreign bank accounts, prepare to be fucked by the long dick of the Internal Revenue Service.
Our suggestion, file an extension and pop bottles this week with the likes of Tiësto, Oscar G, Louis Dee, and the rest of the EDM superstars who'll be spinning digital records 'round the barrier-island playground known as South Beach.
Club Life Tour. With Tiësto and Mednas. Thursday, April 12, 11 p.m., LIV, 4441 Collins Ave., Miami Beach. Visit livnightclub.com. The Led Zeppelin of EDM lands his Club Life spaceship at the Fontainebleau for the first of two Miami Beach sets this weekend.
Keep reading to find out about Tiësto's second gig.
Magic Circus. With Oscar G and Phillippe B. Friday, April 13, 11 p.m., Amnesia, 136 Collins Ave., Miami Beach. Visit amnesiamiami.com. Hometown hero Oscar G throws down a homegrown set you won't soon forget.
Link and Miami Rebels Present Mr. C's 10 Years of Superfreq. Friday, April 13, 11 p.m., Treehouse, 323 23 St., Miami Beach. Visit treehousemiami.com. How do you celebrate ten years of bleep-bloops and weeble-wobbles? With bleep-bloops and weeble-wobbles, of course. Read Crossfade's interview, "Mr.C to America: "Hijack the EDM Scene Back From Europe!"
Louis Dee. Saturday, April 14, 11 p.m., Mansion, 1235 Washington Ave., Miami Beach. Visit mansionmiami.com. If those "I Am MDC" ads needed a soundtrack, Miami-Dade College class of 1995 alum Louis Dee would get the gig.
Splash at the Pool. With DJ Roland Belmares. Saturday, April 14, 12 p.m., Surfcomber Hotel, 1717 Collins Ave., Miami Beach. Visit surfcomber.com. What's Miami Beach Gay Pride without a "gay chic" pool party?
Stafford Brothers. Saturday, April 14, 11 p.m., Wall, 2201 Collins Ave., Miami Beach. Visit wallmiami.com. Party like a storied Spanish futbol squad when Real Madrid's favorite DJs hit Wall for a one-night stand.
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Tiësto. Sunday, April 15, 11 p.m., Amnesia, 136 Collins Ave., Miami Beach. Visit amnesiamiami.com. Holy shit, Tiësto on Thursday? Now Tiësto on Sunday? What a weekend!