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Partying at Buck 15's Electric Lounge

A few weeks ago,as woman named Doris with a thick French accent called me at the office (305-571-72).  "I have been in America for six months," she said. "I am a DJ from Europe and I am throwing a party at Buck 15." She then told me that she had seen my Scary Mary video  and asked if I was into fetish. "My girlfriend Heather is into fetish ...maybe you would like to host the event?"

She continued, "I can't pay you, but you can drink all night for free ... and I will put your name on the flyer." Free drinks all night? "Weeh!" I answered. (That means "yes" in French, right?).

So, this past Wednesday night I arrived at Buck 15 around 11:30 p.m., and recognized Doris from her MySpace pics. She was wearing a sleeveless black Motorhead T-shirt, a spiked belt, and black leather pants. I told her that I love Motorhead. "I don't," she answered. "It's just fashion." She gave me a bunch of drink tickets and I went to the bar. As Blondie's "Call Me" played on the sound system, Heather came up and introduced herself, kissing my cheek. This seemed to make Doris a little jealous, as she walked over and put her arm around her girl. "Anything goes here tonight," said Doris. "It's a gay bar, straight bar, and tranny bar rolled into one."

We sat on a couch and watched lesbians grinding on the dance floor as

"Day Without a Gay, December 10" was discussed. Apparently, in response

to the passing of Proposition 8 (which bans gay marriages), the

nation's LGBT community had chosen Wednesday to protest, Doris said. Instead of calling

in "sick" to school or work, participants were to call in "gay" (i.e. "I won't be in

today because I'm gay").

"We are not supposed to buy anything, either,"

said a man sitting next to me on the couch, "it is supposed to affect

the economy or something." He paused. "I find that so elitist."  We

sipped our drinks and watched men grabbing each other on the dance

floor. "Those guys are creepy, especially the one wearing

the sunglasses," sad my new friend. As we walked towards the bar, he continued

talking shit. "Look at that big fat lesbian! Talk about a desperate

ho-bag." 

Doris walked over and introduced me to a tall woman. "Jason, this is

Madonna." As we shook hands, Madonna said, "I'm in the process of

getting my vagina."

The Electric Lounge takes place every Wednesday at Buck 15, 707

Lincoln Ln., Miami Beach. Doors open at 10 p.m.; admission is free.

Ages 21+ with ID. 305-534-5488; www.buck15.com.

-- Jason Handelsman


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