Maybe he was having "threesomes with a fuckin' triceratops, Reptar" or "fuckin' Goldilocks up in the forest/in the three bear house eatin' their muthafuckin' porridge."
But for some strange reason, Tyler the Creator, the leader of 10-member L.A. rap crew Odd Future, "woke up with a sweaty dick" today. Or was it piss? We're still waiting a follow-up tweet from Odd Future's foul mouthed -- and incredibly revealing -- capo to settle the swamp dick debate.
Until then, however, some other hip hop news.
Odd Future Wolf Gang Kill Them All (OFWGKTA) announced an East Coast run earlier today. But in typical indie music fashion, Tyler and his pack left Miami off the schedule. Basically, the crew said, 'Fuck you, 305. We'd rather play Canada. Or fucking Maryland,' when it was revealed that the West Coast collective would play Toronto and Baltimore, among other cities, during their mid-May mini-tour.
If you've never heard of Tyler, or the rest of Odd Future (Jasper Dolphin, Domo Genesis, Matt Martians of the Super 3, Left Brain, Mike G, Hodgy Beats, Taco, Syd and Earl Sweatshirt), six months ago, our sister paper, LA Weekly, said that Odd Future's lyrical matter was "XXX-rated," and the group's "visual language reflects influences they don't even know they have yet." At the time, everyone in the group was between 16 and 19 years old. Kids, really, spitting rhymes 'bout anal sex, rape, and decomposing bodies, the type of stuff nightmares are made of, real psycho shit. And we fell for their youthful charm.
But a lot's happened in six months, and the Odd Future family is all grown up now. They've polished their act, and Tyler's really taking his role as leader of the pack quite seriously.
"I want to be great, I want to be an icon," he said in a recent interview with The Drone. "I want when I die, I want people to cry -- I'm hungry for VMA's and Grammy's, that's what I'm hungry for. You know? Fuck this underground bullshit."
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OK, he's just as crazy as he was when Caroline Ryder interviewed him for LA Weekly, but Tyler's craziness is also his genius. Last month, the motherfucker jumped off a roof during a SXSW performance, and broke an audience member's nose in the process. So what? That's what it means to "swag the fuck out."