"I just wanna fuck your face," Mike Dece croons on "I Love U," his faux-sensual R&B collaboration with the equally crass Tropical Boy$. "Put my dick deep in your eye."
Obviously, this track is not about playing hard to get. In fact, it's about the exact opposite: getting your freak on and then browsing slutty Tumblr blogs for the next shawty in need of a pearl necklace. And in case the dick jokes didn't tip you off, the Internet-savvy, slightly seapunk production will make the message extra clear: You're in for some swag.
With Metro Zu and Denzel Curry. 8 p.m. Friday, March 30, at Sweat Records, 5505 NE Second Ave., Miami; 786-693-930; sweatrecordsmiami.com. There's no cover. All ages.
Dece has taken a little of this and a little of that from hip-hop's newest school, pairing the poetic stupidity of Lil' B with the antisocial wit of Odd Future, minus the lyrical versatility. But Dece is not preoccupied with proficiency. His platform is idiocy. In fact, one has to wonder if the MC isn't just a swag parody. Although in his defense, local spitter Spaceghostpurrp as well as the Internet-based RVIDXR KLVN collective and Miami swag crew Metro Zu have all cosigned. So we have a feeling Mike Dece is about as serious as Adam Sandler or ODB. Serious about being stupid.
The MC's official stance on the matter: "Suck my penis."