Miami's Eight Dumbest Music Moments of 2014

He has an AK-47 on his face, ho.
He has an AK-47 on his face, ho.
A still from Stitches' music video for "Brick in Yo Face."

Srsly, Miami, wtf?

If you lived 2014 in the 305, you definitely saw a lot of strange headlines related to music.

As we put this bizarre year behind us and look toward the future, we think it's important to reflect upon the past. And because we at Crossfade relish absurdity, we're making special note of the head-scratchinest moments in the past 12 months.

Remember that dumb face tattoo? That race down Alton Road? Those nudes? That brick? We know you don't remember how to twerk, but what else did you forget?

See also: The 10 People Who Won't Make It in Miami

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8. Drake Versus Diddy: Knock-Out Edition

Everybody loves Drake, but nobody denies that he's the softest motherfucker in the whole rap game. Drake's the type of (expletive) to make it rain on a stripper and ask about her dreams.

It should come as no surprise, then, that when Diddy punched him in the face at LIV during Art Basel, the Canadian millionaire just turned the other cheek.

A lot of people thought the beef must have been over lady bits, but that turned out not to be the case. Apparently, it was over money, and we know that's something Diddy takes mighty seriously. That being said, Drake is the one all the girls wanna hear right now. He probably just left the club and called one of the millions of girls he's always name-droppin' in those songs. Long as his ladies love him, right?

See also: Diddy Punches Drake at LIV Miami

7. DJ Khaled Wants You to Buy Your Momma a House

OK, DJ Khaled is one of the weirdest dudes on the planet, never mind Miami. He put his acting chops on display for his latest single, "Hold You Down," but the thing is, bro cannot act.

Also, we're not sure he knows what the word "smart" means. Apparently, if you have some fake body parts and can say his name on command, DJ Khaled will give you money to buy your mom a house, buy your whole family a house, put money in your savings account, spend money for no reason, and a little extra just so you come back and ask for more.

That's a lot of money, but you know what his ass can't afford? Some decent CGI.

See also: Five Signs You Might Be a Shitty Rapper



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