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Jay-Z, Greatest Rapper Corporate Whore Alive

Jay-Z, Greatest Rapper Corporate Whore Alive

Jay-Z is releasing pages of a book dissecting his rhymes through a global scavenger hunt powered by Bing, or something like that. So late night we went to an event at the Delano South Beach hoping to get a reaction to our revelation earlier this month that the Miami Police Department used his image to portray gangbangers on its website.

You know how that goes: Jay-z shows up, speaks for literally less than a minute, takes no questions, and then disappears forever into a pool cabana blocked by the world's tallest bodyguard as we get sloshed on free cocktails.

So instead, we're just going to do one of these posts where we write captions under a bunch of photos.

New rule: Jay-Z is no longer allowed to use photos of himself sitting on Marcy project park benches on his books.
New rule: Jay-Z is no longer allowed to use photos of himself sitting on Marcy project park benches on his books.
Ditto for flashing images of the projects on flat screens at the Delano.
Ditto for flashing images of the projects on flat screens at the Delano.
This pillow is filled with Beyonce's hair. Creepy, we know.
This pillow is filled with Beyonce's hair. Creepy, we know.
"we just bought this kid's soul for $17!"
"we just bought this kid's soul for $17!"
Jay-Z was right behind her. "I didn't get in your shot, did I?"
Jay-Z was right behind her. "I didn't get in your shot, did I?"
We entered a weird paparazzi mode during the big "unveil" next to the swimming pool.
We entered a weird paparazzi mode during the big "unveil" next to the swimming pool.
This is the single best photo of Jay-Z's ear that is publicly available.
This is the single best photo of Jay-Z's ear that is publicly available.
This photo is worth $8,000. But we are willing to negotiate.
This photo is worth $8,000. But we are willing to negotiate.
Having your lyrics' curse words bleeped out on the bottom of a swimming pool: A new level of corporate whoredom?
Having your lyrics' curse words bleeped out on the bottom of a swimming pool: A new level of corporate whoredom?

One more thing on the swimming pool lyrics. There was a little footnote "7" after the lyric "Continental sitting on blades". Footnotes! On the bottom of a swimming pool! And to think that Jaz-O probably spent last night in his Brooklyn apartment, eating Froot Loops and watching old episodes of "Rap City" that he recorded on VHS.


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