Every once in awhile Mother Nature fucks up real bad and rolls a poor three-faced freak off the reproductive assembly line. We've all seen kittens and piglets and even human babies with five eyes, two and a half mouths, and one kaleidoscopically malformed nose. Back in the dark ages, these anomalies of the animal kingdom were the unholy products of curses cast by satanic cults and evil covens. In modern day America, they're generally considered the mutant offspring of a poisoned environment.
But there's another theory ... What if Roofless Records and all those other mad scientists involved with monthly freakfest Strange Days have been quietly toiling away in a shady, underground genetics lab, manufacturing Mother Nature's next batch of biologically distorted hellspawn? Sure, it sounds paranoid, illogical, and outright delusional. But Dr. Moreau seemed pretty cool at first, too. Didn't he?
If you like this story, consider signing up for our email newsletters.
SHOW ME HOW
You have successfully signed up for your selected newsletter(s) - please keep an eye on your mailbox, we're movin' in!
So, maybe Roofless isn't actually a front for deranged bio-engineering experiments. Perhaps it's just a record label full of party people, interested in nothing more nefarious than offbeat fun and experimental music. And that's probably the case. But when you go see Cop City/Chill Pillars, Skeleton Warrior, Moon Dust Plus, and Lesson Lesson Lessen Relearn tomorrow night, watch out. 'Cause if you see a braying, yellow-eyed equine chimera chilling in a corner with a Colt 45, it's time to fucking bounce.