E!'s Ice Loves Coco Is So Cute We Wanna F$#% Our Shoes!
Are you too cool to watch E!'s Ice Loves Coco? No effing way.
Firstly, Ice T is motherfuckin' awesome and Coco's body is banging. Secondly, the rapper, metalhead, and Law & Order badass proves to be a superinteresting guy, both at home and under the big lights. Thirdly, Coco is more than just a supernaturally powerful ass; she's also a go-getter and a quirky character.
Like a lot of other reality TV, the main male figure is the key to Ice Loves Coco's winning formula. Example: Without Bruce Jenner's sage words and calming presence, the Kardashians are simply a flock of fighting hens. And Ice is that guy for this show. He is a humorous, fatherly dude. He knows himself. He knows the lady he married. He gives good advice.
His wife of ten years, Coco, is writing a book titled Angel about a lady who shapeshifts to solve mysteries. She has a clothing line called Licious. She's obsessed with shoes. And with Ice's help, she produced a song called "Shoe Freak."
During the recording, she had to say "I love my shoes" four or five times. And Coco, feeling inspired, asked if she could get freaky. Singing into the mic, she purred, "I love my shoes, I love my shoes," before suddenly blurting out "I want to fuck them!" There was silence in the studio for about five seconds. And then Ice laughed loudly. She wondered if it was too much. But he simply said, "How can it be too much for me when I'm Ice motherfuckin' T?" Too cute.
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Meanwhile, the defining moment for Coco was her trip to the dog park with Ice and their bulldog, Spartacus.
Just a few minutes after arriving at the puppy playground, a lady who's had doggy beef with Coco sauntered over with her mutt. Ice called the canine a "crackhead dog." And true to his name, crackhead dog went crazy, hopped the fence, and escaped the park, speeding in circles toward the street. Like a superhero, Coco leapt, in her pink mule heels, over a stone wall and sprinted after crackhead dog. There was a short struggle. But ultimately, she saved the pup.
This is the instant when Coco revealed herself to be a truly good person, rescuing her nemesis's pet. So c'mon, how can you not love Coco? She's the mommy to Ice's daddy.
On last night's show, Coco asked Ice to attend salsa classes with her. (Quote of the night: "You have to become close really, really quick. It [salsa class] is like going to the gynecologist.") And even though he joked about being an expert at avoiding things he doesn't want to do, Ice took his lady to class and entered the studio with style, doing a little twirl in his green "glacamole gator" shoes. Really ... How cute is this stuff?!
Yes, these guys may look a little funny. He's the aging rapper, she's the blonde bombshell. But they're chill as shit. Ice loves Coco and Coco loves Ice. There's definitely something to be learned by watching these two kooky celebrities.
Ice Loves Coco airs Sunday at 10:30 p.m. on E!
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