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DJ Khaled Christmas and Miami's Six Best Holiday 2012 Parties

Only boring people spend the season singing silly songs in the company of loved ones while getting stuffed full of fruitcake, sucking back Manischewitz, and forging lovely lasting memories.

So be cool like Crossfade. Go get so wasted that you forget it's Christmas! Uhntz-uhntz with the Matzo crowd! Headbang through the holidays!

See also:

-Too Short Raps for Jews: "It's Hanukkah, Baby, Now Move That Ass Over"

-A Skrillex Christmas and Ten Outrageous Light Displays Synched With Crappy Music

-DMX Goes Hard on "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer" Cover, Shuts Bing Crosby Down

DJ Khaled Christmas and Miami's Six Best Holiday 2012 Parties
Photo by Ciara Osorio

Candyland. With Stanton Warriors, AK1200, Juan Basshead, and others. Friday, December 21, 10 p.m., The Vagabond, 30 NE 14th St., Miami; 305-379-0508; thevagabondmiami.com. Tickets cost $20 plus fees via wantickets.com. Ages 21 and up. WTF is that rumble? Well, it isn't St. Nick, Rudolph, and the rest landing on NE 14th Street for a nog stop. Just Candyland unleashing that yuletide bass.

DJ Khaled's We The Best Christmas Party. Saturday, December 22, 11 p.m., Cameo, 1445 Washington Ave., Miami Beach; 305-532-2667; cameomiami.com. Tickets cost $30 plus fees via wantickets.com. Ages 21 and up. Unlike Santa Claus, when DJ Khaled squeezes into a red suit, shouting, "Ho! Ho! Ho!," he ain't just bein' a jolly good fellow. He's calling for "Bitches & Bottles." 'Cause homie got a seasonal thirst.

 

DJ Khaled Christmas and Miami's Six Best Holiday 2012 Parties

Space's Holiday Spectacular. With Boris. Saturday, December 22, 10 p.m., Space, 34 NE 11th St. Miami; 305-375-0001; clubspace.com. Tickets cost $20 to $40 plus fees via wantickets.com. Ages 21 and up. When enjoying a so-called "Holiday Spectacular" in Space, be careful, beat freaks. Ecstatic celebrations in zero gravity can cause decompression sickness, barotrauma, and extreme dehydration.

This Xmas, shred like Eddie the Head.
This Xmas, shred like Eddie the Head.

Jingle Bell Rock Metal Fest. Presented by Gorrilla Music. With Stone Heads, Tabula Rasa, Infrofuse, and others. Sunday, December 23, 9 p.m., Churchill's Pub, 5501 NE Second Ave., Miami; 305-757-1807; churchillspub.com. Cover costs $12. Ages 21 and up. Celebrate a metalhead Xmas at Little Haiti's scuzziest rock club. Peppermint Jäger shots. A trip through the merry mosh pit. Maybe even a Fraser fir in flames.

 

MatzoBall. Presented by Society of Young Jewish Professionals and JDate. Monday, December 24, 8 p.m., LIV, 4441 Collins Ave., Miami Beach; 305-674-4680; livnightclub.com. Tickets cost $30 plus fees via wantickets.com. Ages 21 and up. How do Jews spend Christmas time? Either eating Chinese food, checking out the new Barbara Streisand flick, or enjoying some MatzoBall, "a night of high-energy networking and matchmaking for singles ages 21-49 years of age."

Diplo. With Vice, Ruen, and Jessica Who. As part of Dirty Hairy. Wednesday, December 26, 11 p.m., LIV, 4441 Collins Ave., Miami Beach; 305-674-4680; livnightclub.com. Tickets cost $40 to $60 plus fees via wantickets.com. Ages 21 and up. If you've never heard of Dipmas, it's the annual commemoration of the birth of Wes Pentz, when ladies buss it open, bros rock a festive turtleneck, and the whole world rejoices! As Diplo himself would say: "Express yourself!"

Follow Crossfade on Facebook and Twitter @Crossfade_SFL.

Use Current Location

Related Locations

miles
Space

34 NE 11th St.
Miami, FL 33132

305-375-0001

www.clubspace.com

miles
Churchill's Pub

5501 NE 2nd Ave.
Miami, FL 33137

305-757-1807

www.churchillspub.com

miles
Cameo

1445 Washington Ave.
Miami Beach, FL 33139

305-532-2667

www.cameomiami.com

miles
LIV

4441 Collins Ave.
Miami Beach, FL 33140

305-674-4680

www.livnightclub.com

miles
The Vagabond - Closed

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