In an effort to needlessly destroy as many trees as possible, Creed frontman Scott Stapp will release his memoir on October 2.
The book, titled Sinner's Creed, will be released in hardcover and ebook. But there are no current plans for an audiobook. This is most likely because the target audience does not care much for recorded sound.
But what do we know? After all, the press release for the book calls Stapp "a rock and roll visionary." So maybe the book will be an awesome read.
More likely, however, you'd have a better time soldering your face to a chair and setting up shop at a chili cook-off. Seriously, the olfactory equivalent of Creed's music is having an acidic fart blown straight into your face.
Oh, whatever. It's hard to get worked up over something like this crap. Like, it's great that Stapp beat his addictions and depression. It's fantastic that a publicist gets to pay rent because of "the true story of a man living on the edge at full tilt." (See Chapter 3: The Scoliosis Brace, My Own Prison.)
There are so many worse things than Creed in the world, like homelessness and a lack of clean water in developing nations. But just because you've got a place to live and all the energy drinks you can stomach doesn't mean you have to smile every time someone rips a wet one right in your gob.
So, to recap, if you've memorized all of your cereal boxes and worked through everything Roberto Bolaño wrote by October 2, give Scott Stapp's shitty book a try. Creed's tour hits Melbourne on August 30 and Pensacola on August 31. But again ... whatever.
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Bonus: If you've never read this story about Scott Stapp trying to get some tail at a Denny's in Gainesville, check it out. He's a total doofus.